


The Blue Lion Nightclub

by Shiro_Kabocha



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Ashe is a bartender so some alcohol use but not much, Dimitri owns a nightclub and the Blue Lions all work there, First Kiss, Flirting, Grinding, Hand Jobs, Light Angst, M/M, Making Out, Oral Sex, Pining, thigh fucking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-27
Updated: 2020-02-13
Packaged: 2020-10-29 07:10:51
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 55,511
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20792690
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shiro_Kabocha/pseuds/Shiro_Kabocha
Summary: Modern AU where Ashe tends bar at the popular nightclub The Blue Lion and has a small (huge) crush on the bouncer, Dedue.  When the club's primary bartender up and quits without warning and Ashe is left on his own, who will help him keep up with orders behind the bar?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I'm not usually a big fan of AUs, but for some reason this idea would just not leave me alone. I hope it's as good here as it is in my head!

Ashe hissed as lime juice found a cut on his finger, otherwise ignoring the pain to toss the cut lime into a bowl tucked beneath the counter. He was way behind his usual bar prep and it was Friday night, so in exactly thirty minutes, the bar would be flooded with orders. He and the other bartender would be too swamped to cut limes later, so he worked through the pain, grabbing another lime and cutting it into quarters. As he worked at the mindless task, he listed off all his other to-do items in his head: Salt the margarita glasses, check the pressure in the taps, line up the popular mixers so they were close at hand, set out the bowls of chex mix on the bar, ready more steins for frosting in the freezer. Bartending school had only taught him how to mix drinks; it hadn't taught him all the pre-work that went into an opening shift. Still, he was grateful to have a job at all.

He'd be more grateful if the senior bartender would show up, though.

"All alone tonight?" The cheerful inquiry startled Ashe, nearly causing him to cut himself as he sliced the next lime. "Oh, sorry! I didn't mean to startle you!"

"It's nothing!" Ashe smiled, looking up as he tossed the lime into its bowl. "I should have been paying attention. Hello, Annette. Are you just getting here?"

"Yep!" Annette was one of the few veteran servers at the club, one who could still maintain a cheerful air while putting up with none of the customers drunken antics. She was tying on an orange apron over the standard black dress that served as her uniform. "Is there anything I can help with? Looks like you're way behind!"

"Well, Caspar hasn't shown up yet, so I'm trying to do everything myself," Ashe admitted. "You haven't heard anything from him, have you?"

"No, sorry." Annette shrugged. "I had to block his number after he kept texting me to ask me out. But I can help until he gets here! What can I do?"

Ashe hesitated; he hadn't been working at the popular nightclub The Blue Lion for very long, but even he knew Annette's good intentions usually came with a side of clutzy disaster. Still, though, he was way behind... "Would you mind filling the bowls with chex mix? I could really use the help."

"I'm on it!" Annette declared, pumping her fists in the air as she spun around to grab the pre-mixed bags of chex mix. Ashe had to lunge after her and catch the mixers her elbow knocked from a shelf. "Sorry! I'm sorry!"

"No worries!" Ashe assured her, smiling as he set the mixers back on the shelf.

"My, Annie, you should really take care when moving about in such a narrow space." The soft, kindly voice came from Mercedes, the coat-check girl as well as the friend who had helped Ashe get this job that he didn't quite feel entirely prepared for. "Some of those bottles of liquor cost more than your weekly paycheck."

"I know, I'll be careful," Annette promised morosely. And then she nearly dropped the stack of bowls she was setting on the counter to fill. Blushing sheepishly after Ashe helped her set them on the counter, she began filling them with fastidious care.

"Good evening, Mercedes," Ashe said, greeting his friend as he began salting the never-ending queue of margarita glasses. "It must be getting close to opening time if you're here."

"Yes, and there's quite a line outside already." Mercedes eyes swept the bar, taking in Annette's "help" as she spilled a handful of chex mix onto the bar. "Did Caspar call out for the evening?"

"I sure hope not," Ashe said, trying for a laugh that stuck in his throat like a sob. "I haven't been doing this long enough to be on my own yet."

"I can help!" Annette said cheerfully, scraping up the mess she'd made on the counter. "I've been serving drinks long enough to know how to make them!"

Mercedes and Ashe exchanged a patiently doubtful look. "What would the other servers do without you, Annie?"

"Maybe I could just do both!"

Ashe cringed inwardly at the thought of Annette trying to both mix and serve drinks; he doubted they'd have an unbroken bottle left behind the bar by the time the night ended. "That's kind of you, Annette, but I'm sure Caspar is just running late. He'll be here soon."

"Speaking of someone being here soon." Mercedes flicked her eyes to the employee entrance across the open floor that would soon be full of crashing bodies, thumping music and flashing lights. Ashe felt his cheeks burn as a familiar tall, broad-shouldered bouncer stepped inside. "Annette, when you're finished here, would you help me set up the coat-check?"

"Yes, of course!" Annette put her elbow in one of the bowls, spilling its contents across the counter. "Oh! Why is this so hard?"

"You know what, Annette, I'm pretty well caught up now, thanks to your help." Ashe smiled brightly as he lied; if anything he was farther behind than ever and running out of chex mix. "Why don't you go help Mercedes and I'll finish getting the bar ready?"

"Are you sure?" Annette asked, sweeping her latest mess into a trash bin.

"I'm positive."

"Well, okay then." As Annette bounded off after Mercedes, the club's bouncer sidled up to the bar, taking a seat at the end.

"Good evening, Dedue," Ashe said, keeping his eyes low as he finished cleaning crumbs off the counter. "Would you like your usual?"

"If it isn't any trouble." That low rumble of a voice sent shivers down Ashe's spine that he didn't quite know how to define. Rather than embarrass himself by trying to speak, he nodded and busied himself with pouring a tall glass of club soda garnished with a twist of lime. He set it on the counter before the bouncer with a smile and the briefest flash of eye contact before he felt his cheeks warm. Ashe hurriedly turned away to finish his bar prep.

Dedue never spoke much, but ever since Ashe had started working the bar--almost a full month now--Dedue had come in a few minutes before the start of his shift and requested a club soda with lime, drinking it at the bar while the bartenders set up the bar for the night. He never said much, even when spoken to, and when Ashe had asked about him, Caspar had only said Dedue was "a weird dude." Annette said he was trustworthy and Mercedes said he was kind but all Ashe knew of him was that his green eyes were gorgeous and the pitch of his voice, no matter how soft-spoken, resonated through to his bones. He'd also learned not to trust himself around knives or delicate glassware whenever Dedue sat at the bar, due to his shaking hands, so Ashe busied himself with checking the flow of each of the taps.

Without Annette or Caspar to fill the void with chatter, the silence was a physical presence stifling the air over the bar. Ashe felt pressured to say something, but what? He cleared his throat, shot a glance down at Dedue, felt his ears burn as the tap he'd pulled coughed and gasped before spitting out a stream of beer, then quickly closed his mouth again.

Dedue silently sipped his club soda.

Just say something, Ashe urged himself. You know he's really nice, even if he doesn't talk much just--say hi or something!

He caught himself, covering it with a cough, when he started to say "Good evening" again. Gah, why was this so hard?!

"Um, Mercedes said there's a line outside already," Ashe finally managed to say, although he couldn't make eye contact. "Guess it'll be busy, huh?"

"Mm." A simple utterance of agreement. Not much to go on.

"I suppose you haven't heard anything about Caspar coming in late tonight?" Ashe asked hopefully.

Dedue shook his head.

Ashe sighed. "Well, maybe everyone will be too interested in dancing to want drinks." He laughed nervously. "I know that's not realistic, but I can hope, right?"

For a moment, it looked as if Dedue might speak. He shifted on his bar stool, the cords of his throat worked and his mouth started to open--then the main doors of the club crashed open, allowing in a dull roar of noise as well as four people each wearing an outfit that easily cost as much as Ashe's rent on his studio apartment.

The tall blond at the apex of the foursome was the club owner and basically local royalty: Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd. He was scrolling through his phone as his second-in-command, a blonde woman with severely short-cut hair, spoke a steady stream of words into his ear. Dimitri nodded blithely as the two men behind them struggled to pull the doors shut. Well, the redhead was lingering, talking to someone Ashe assumed must be a gorgeous woman by the amount of charm Sylvain was oozing. After a long enough delay, Felix, as dark and dangerous-looking as a black mamba, yanked him away from the door by his collar and slammed the doors shut. Every night the four of them arrived just before opening like celebrities on a red carpet, using the crowded main entrance rather than the back door the rest of the employees slithered through when beginning their shifts.

Ashe didn't know much about Dimitri other than the fact that he seemed nice when he wasn't busy--which was always. Dimitri and Mercedes were old friends, which was how Ashe had gotten the job he knew he wasn't fully qualified for. He worked hard to be worthy of it, though, as the pay was far better than he'd get anywhere else in the city. Most of the time, he tried to stay under the radar with Dimitri, letting Caspar handle any conversations concerning a broken ice machine or a delayed order of tequila. Now, unfortunately, Ashe had no such shield. His eyes tracked the group as they crossed the empty dance floor like a well-trained battalion, all stopping short when Dimitri halted and looked towards the bar.

"Ashe, good evening." The friendly greeting made hope well up inside Ashe just before it was dashed: "You'll be manning the bar yourself this weekend. Caspar quit unexpectedly and I can't take any interviews until Monday."

"O-oh." Panic rose in his chest like an icy wave cresting to a frothy peak. "Is there someone else who can help out? I-I'm afraid I'm still not as skilled as Caspar at keeping up with the drink orders."

"There isn't anyone to spare," Ingrid put in quickly. "We lost two servers to that Black Eagle club at the end of the street, in addition to Caspar."

"At least they haven't managed to steal any of our customers yet," Sylvain put in with a roguish grin. "At least, not the pretty ones."

Felix gave a disgusted sigh and rolled his eyes, a shadow behind the three shining stars of the club.

"You'll manage, though, right?" Ingrid continued. "It's just three days."

Three of the busiest days of the week, Ashe though. No, he wasn't ready for this much responsibility on his own. But there wasn't anything else for it, so he smiled and nodded. "Of course, I--"

"Could I help?" The soft, low rumble felt like the shifting of the earth beneath Ashe's feet, yet it was comforting rather than disconcerting. All eyes turned to Dedue sitting at the end of the bar. "I can’t help much with the mixed drinks, but I can pour beer and soda. Would that be enough to help?"

Ashe let out a breath that made him dizzy. "It really would, if you could just--"

"I'm sorry, Dedue," Dimitri cut in. He actually looked it, too. "But I need on you on the doors. There isn't anyone else who can work crowd control like you can."

Dedue cast a look over at Ashe that he read as something like regret. Ashe felt his heart sink; however was he supposed to manage the bar all on his own?

"I'll work the door." The unexpected salvation came from Felix, one hand set against his slender waist in grim disdain. "Sylvain can help, too. It's not as if you really need us in here."

"Hey, why am I getting door-duty?" Sylvain asked in protest. "I'm the official party-starter on the dance--"

"I need you to decide which people are pretty enough to bypass the line," Felix replied, digging an elbow into Sylvain's side. "Come on. It's nearly time to open."

"Well, if you two are sure..." Dimitri wasn't given much of a choice as Felix dragged Sylvain off towards the main entrance. He shot a look at Ingrid, who merely shrugged. "I guess that means you can help at the bar tonight if you want to, Dedue."

"I do. If that's alright?" The question was pointed at Ashe, rather than the club owner. Ashe swallowed hard as those soul-searing green eyes met his.

"Y-yes, that would--would be a big--a large--a-a-a help." Ashe hoped his face didn't look as red as it felt. He just about choked on his own saliva as Dedue stepped behind the bar, easily picking up where Annette had left off filling bowls of chex mix. Dimitri and Ingrid drifted away towards the DJ table, where Set A-Flame, the club's usual DJ pair, was performing their sound-check. Ashe skittered to the far side of the bar, giving Dedue plenty of room to work. It was suddenly hard to think with Dedue standing so close, a solid mass of muscle and subtle cologne and pheromones all clamoring at once for Ashe's attention.

I have to say something, Ashe told himself, Or else he'll think I didn't want his help.

"Ah, um, it was...really nice of Felix and Sylvain to offer to work the door," Ashe said, eyes low as he set out the mixers, flipping each one over quickly to ensure the pour spout was properly attached. "And--of course it was really nice of you to offer to help me out, too! I, um, I'm still kind of new at this."

"You're good at it, though." The soft-spoken compliment had Ashe staring up in surprise. He'd always known Dedue was much taller than him, but the difference seemed greatly exaggerated now that they stood nearly shoulder-to-shoulder (more like should-to-elbow, really) in the narrow space behind the bar. Dedue had a small smile on his face. "If you keep working at the basics, you'll master this skill in no time."

"Ah, thanks." Ashe felt his blush like a sunburn. He ducked his head and ruffled his hair. "I guess I do make a mean club soda with a twist sometimes."

He'd been hoping to hear the bouncer laugh--Ashe wasn't sure he'd heard so much as a chuckle from him ever--but instead he felt an ominous drop in his stomach as a looming shadow fell over him. He looked up, swallowing, as the club lights dropped into spinning, colorful flashes.

"You should let me stand by the taps," Dedue suggested. "I won't be much help with the actual mixed drinks."

"Ah, yes, of course!" Ashe did the best he could to step past Dedue without touching him, but the space was too narrow and their hips just brushed as they switched places at the bar. Ashe started to stammer an apology, but just then music began to flood through the speakers, thudding in his chest and rattling the floorboards. Speech was made all but impossible so Ashe merely blushed and shrugged. Dedue scanned the carefully arrayed glasses, garnishes and bottles behind the bar, familiarizing himself with everything. Ashe busied himself uselessly with spacing out the bowls of chex mix, tucking a few beneath the bar to replace the ones that emptied the fastest.

Ashe had thought that sharing such a small space with such an immense person--whom he had an even greater crush on--would have been awkward, but as the club doors opened and the bar was soon rushed for orders, he couldn't think about anything more than mixing drinks. As always, he started out a little stiff, sometimes pouring too much or too little of a single ingredient. Caspar had been a master at working the crowd, flipping bottles behind his back, yelling cheerfully over the music and sliding drinks down the bar with smug confidence. Ashe didn't quite have that finesse yet, but as the night went on, he fell into the rhythm that allowed him to work a little more freely, smile a little more easily and put his own creative spin on mixing drinks.

Every so often a server would duck behind the bar and drop off a hastily scrawled drink order, which Ashe would have to peer at in the yellow light beneath the bar to interpret. He'd call out the tap orders to Dedue as he hurried to mix up the drinks, all with the appropriate garnish. His one clear memory of the night was of his fingers brushing Dedue's as he passed over a beer mug to set on an order tray. A roving spotlight had passed over Dedue's face and Ashe could have sworn the kind giant was smiling.

Dedue proved a quick study and was more than willing to help pour shots of tequila or simple drinks either neat or on the rocks, leaving only the mixed drinks, the blended drinks, and the layered shots topped with whipped cream to Ashe. It was hectic and Ashe couldn't quite please the crowd the way Caspar could, but they kept up. Barely. It wasn't until shortly after midnight that Ashe felt as if he were allowed to draw a full breath. By now, most of the club's patrons were buzzing pretty hard, if not drunk, and many were beginning to think about sobering up to get safely home in a few hours. It was the ebb of the tide, where the few drink orders placed were all for water, soda or coffee. With a relieved sigh, Ashe began wiping down the counter with a damp rag, cleaning up the inevitable spills, crumbs and squirts of citrus.

While it was calming down at the bar, the party was still pounding out on the dance floor. When Ashe looked out over the crowd, he would catch the occasional glimpse of Dimitri mingling with quests, always with Ingrid close behind, sometimes making conversation but more often than not, keeping an eye on the business through the screen of her phone. Usually Sylvain was the one out on the dance floor, keeping the party going and the drinks flowing, but his absence didn't seem too missed.

The club roared and shook as a favorite song blasted through the speakers, its siren call luring drinkers away from high top tables and their seats at the bar. Servers took advantage of the guests' absence to clear away drinks and wipe down tables. One server in particular caught Ashe's eye, swaying and bobbing to the beat of the song, smiling wildly as she danced. Annette wasn't graceful by any means--in fact, Dimitri had had to ban her from dancing while carrying a tray of drinks after she'd dropped one too many of them--but she was bright and enthusiastic and catching the beat from her, Ashe found himself moving to the rhythm as well. Not full on dancing, no, but tapping his heel and nodding his head as he continued mopping up behind the bar.

Ashe didn't even notice he'd started dancing until he slid his cloth the length of the bar and bumped up against a dark-skinned hand resting atop it. He glanced up, blushing as he apologized.

"Sorry, I, um, like this song?"

"I can tell." Was Dedue smiling? It was impossible to tell in the strobing lights. "Did you ever come here to dance before you started working here?"

"Ah, no." Ashe forced a smile. He'd never even set foot in a club before he'd started working at the Blue Lion. "I'm afraid life's kept me too busy for dancing or anything like that. But it's nice to get to experience it now."

Dedue looked thoughtful and simply nodded once without replying. Wordlessly, he helped Ashe stack dirty glasses into the dishwasher and collect empty mixers, citrus rinds and scattered pour spouts, putting everything back where it belonged. Cleaning up after a busy night was the part Ashe was most familiar with as a bar tender: Caspar had decreed it the job of the bar-tender-in-training--mostly, Ashe suspected, so Caspar could keep collecting tips while avoiding the unpleasant task of taking out the garbage--but Ashe had never minded. Closing down the bar meant his night was that much closer to being over.

"It's probably alright if you wanted to go," Ashe offered as Dedue helped him replace a keg in the taproom behind the bar. "I'm really very grateful for your help, but there won't be much else to do for the night except serve water and coffee. I wouldn't want to impose too far on your kindness."

Ashe felt like he was being studied by those deep, green eyes. "I don't mind finishing the shift with you."

"Oh, um--" Ashe was all set to blush and blunder his way through a response when someone thumped their elbows heavily across the bar.

"Whew! That was actually kind of fun!" Sylvain tossed his hair out of his eyes, grinning over the bar at Ashe and Dedue. "Don't know why I haven't worked the line before. Can I get a shot of Fireball?"

"Of course!" Ashe spun away to pour the shot, missing the moment when Felix sidled up beside Sylvain. He did catch Dedue's soft question as to whether everything had gone alright without him.

"Oh, well, Felix did start one fight." Sylvain hooked a thumb over his shoulder at his predatory shadow. "But other than that, it was fine."

"It wasn't much of a fight," Felix put in, nodding to Ashe as he handed over a shot of Jack Daniels single-barrel whiskey. "And it wouldn't have been anything at all if Sylvain hadn't been trying to get his girlfriend's phone number."

Sylvain flicked a wrist dismissively as he threw back his shot, then slammed the glass back onto the bar. "She wasn't all that into him, if you ask me. And how was I to know he'd throw a punch? No one ever starts a fight when Dedue works the line."

"Well, that's because Dedue is...Dedue," Ashe finished lamely, realizing he couldn't very well talk about Dedue while standing right next to him. Embarrassed and trying to hide it, he collected the empty shot glasses and washed them in the sink. Thankfully, rather than ask Ashe what he'd meant, Dedue had noted Felix's scuffed knuckles with an admonishing frown. He scooped up some ice and wrapped it in a paper towel, pressing the cold compress to Felix's hand.

"Thanks, but this is nothing," Felix replied, taking the ice anyway. "And I don't mind a fight every now and then; it keeps me sharp."

Dedue frowned and said nothing. Ashe thought he understood though: If Dedue had been outside, that fight never would have occurred. There was a reason Dimitri had hired a near-giant as his bouncer. Most people were too intimidated to pick a fight with him.

After a bit of banter over the bar, Sylvain and Felix swirled away into the crowd, disappearing into the flashing lights and thudding bass. Ashe went back to straightening up the bar and pouring coffees. If Felix and Sylvain were finished with door-duty, that could only mean that the club would be closing in another hour or two. While he enjoyed his work, there was little more that Ashe looked forward to than going home and closing his eyes for a few short hours. As Dedue stooped to pick up an empty keg, his shoulders bulging with muscle beneath his black v-neck shirt, Ashe amended that thought: Some precious few things were much better than sleep.

The thudding of the music slowly petered out, the lights becoming incrementally brighter until all the creatures of the night fled to the coat-check, retrieving their belongings before beginning the stumble back to their homes. Ashe was always grateful for the dim, steady light that suffused the club once everyone had left. He felt certain that the ceiling lights would have seared his retinas after so many hours of working in the near darkness. As it was, he felt nearly deafened by the absence of the bass.

Ashe was just lifting racks of steaming glasses out of the dishwasher to cool and dry on the counter when Dedue gathered up the four heavy trash bags to take outside.

"No, no, I'll get those," Ashe assured him quickly, taking care to set the rack down so it wouldn't tip over. "It's a long walk out to the dumpster and you've done so much for me tonight already."

Dedue looked from the trash bags over to Ashe. "It would take you two trips to carry all of this."

"I don't mind! Really." Carrying out the trash had been Caspar's least favorite part of the job, so it had fallen to Ashe to do every night. While he didn't love lugging the often-leaking bags down the alley, he didn't mind it too much. He liked catching a few breaths of the outside air, so different from the air inside the club. "Please, um, at least let me help you? The lid on the dumpster is kind of heavy."

It was a lame excuse, really. Dedue didn't need Ashe’s help to carry the trash any more than he needed Ashe to lift the lid of the dumpster, but he nodded all the same, taking three bags and leaving only the smallest one for Ashe. Together they pushed through the side exit (Ashe propping the door open with a brick) and made their way down the fenced-off alley. It smelled like old fried food and a cacophony of different beers, but Ashe had long grown used to the scent. He hefted up the lid of the dumpster and held it open for Dedue. After dropping his bags inside, he took Ashe's trash bag from him and tossed it in after.

"Ah, thanks." Ashe was grateful for the darkness covering his blush. Honestly, how could he get so embarrassed when their hands had brushed over a trash bag of all things?

"Ashe." Hearing his name in that deep, bone-shivering voice nearly made him gasp out loud. He looked up into his own wide-eyed reflection inside Dedue's eyes. "Do you mind if I ask you a question?"

"Yes. I mean, no. I mean--" Why did he always manage to sound like an idiot whenever he spoke to Dedue? Taking a breath, he finished: "I don't mind. Please ask."

It was hard to tell if Dedue was offended or inquisitive. "Do I intimidate you?"

"Wh-what?" Ashe blinked.

"I've been told I'm intimidating," Dedue explained. "I don't mean to be. I suppose it's a combination of my height and my face, along with the fact that I don't speak much. It's helpful for my job, but I'd hate to think that I intimidate you."

"N-no! Not at all." Actually, when they had first met, Ashe had felt intimidated by the large bouncer, but it hadn't lasted past Dedue's first soft-spoken "hello." It was Ashe's pure physical attraction that had him stuttering and shying every time Dedue happened to look his way. But he certainly couldn't admit that out loud! "I actually really like talking with you. To you. At the bar. Before opening." There he went sounding like an idiot again. "It's just...hard to talk once the club opens."

This time Ashe was sure he saw a small smile on Dedue's face. "I like talking with you, too." There was a shuffling silence between them. Ashe knew they should be heading back inside--he still had a few closing chores to finish at the bar--but all he wanted was to spend a few more minutes outside, watching the street lamps highlight the features of Dedue's face. "If you're interested, I know a good pho place that’s is still open after your shift ends."

"Oh!" Ashe felt hot blood fill his face so quickly that he nearly felt faint. Yes, he was interested! Yes, he wanted to go! But... "I...I'm really sorry, but I can't. I have to get home."

"I see." Though his tone didn't change, Ashe thought he heard disappointment in Dedue's voice. "Perhaps another time."

"Yes. Perhaps." Ashe ducked his head. Maybe one day he'd have time for himself. Time for friends, time for pho, time for, perhaps, something more. This wasn't that time, though. "I should...we should go back inside. A few guests left their tabs open and I have to set their cards aside for Ingrid."

"Of course." Dedue led the way back inside. The club still smelled of cheap perfume, sweat, frivolity and very faintly of vomit. Ingrid was already standing behind the register, closing out the till for the evening. As she crunched the numbers, Ashe collected the orphaned credit cards, placing them inside an envelope for Ingrid to contact their owners with later. The rest of closing up the bar was simple minutiae: wiping down the counters, rinsing off the bar mats, recording what had been depleted over the course of the night so that more could be ordered.

"Here's the total of tonight's credit card tips," Ingrid said, scrawling a number on a strip of receipt paper. "How do you want it divvied out between you two?"

"Fifty-fifty is fine for me," Ashe said immediately. That was actually better than his usual split with Caspar, which had been 60-40 as Ashe was still the junior bartender.

"No. Give them all to Ashe," Dedue said, working the air out of a recently replaced keg. "I didn't help that much."

"What do you mean you didn't help that much?" Ashe asked, surprised. "I couldn't have kept up at all without you! Fifty percent of the tips is the least I can do. Unless you want more? I don't mind going back to the sixty-forty split I had with Caspar."

"No," Dedue insisted. "All I did was pour beer and soda all night. You were the bartender; you deserve all the tips."

"Okay, well, I don't have time to sit and listen to the two of you argue, so..." Ingrid popped open the register and counted out a stack of bills. "I've cashed out the tips, but don't get used to this. This is reportable income, you know."

"Oh, um, you don't have to--" Ashe started, but Ingrid just shook her head.

"It's after two in the morning. You two figure out what you're going to do with the cash. Preferably before the rest of us leave for the night." She finished setting up the register, then left with a bag full of cash and receipts. The stack of tips lay like a verdant, green hill on the counter between Ashe and Dedue.

Ashe swallowed, shifting nervously from foot to foot. "Please take your half? Really, I couldn't have done any of this on my own. I was panicking when Dimitri said I'd be on my own tonight. And you did a lot more than just fill beer and soda orders. Really. So, please?"

Dedue met his gaze with a flat, unreadable expression. "You must have taken a bartending course in order to get this job, is that correct?"

"Er, yes?" Ashe still remembered the sting of the cost of that course. He still hadn't paid the whole thing off yet; every paycheck just chipped away at the balance sitting on a credit card he shouldn't have qualified for.

"That means you are qualified to mix drinks and accept payment," Dedue explained, still deadpan. "I have no such qualifications. You performed all the duties of the bartender and therefore deserve all the tips."

"I understand what you're saying, but it still isn't right." Just looking at the mound of cash made Ashe's insides twist with guilt. Yes, he'd worked for it, but he still didn't feel he'd earned it. Slowly, he came to a decision. "I'll accept all the tips just this once if you'll do something for me."

Dedue's eyebrows rose a fraction of an inch, which was just about as startled as the giant ever looked. "What's that?"

"Will you--" Ashe stammered, losing his courage partway through his request. He looked away and started again. "Could you please continue to work the bar with me? Just until Dimitri hires a new bartender?"

Ashe held his breath, unable to look up until Dedue answered. "I'll have to check with Dimitri. But I don't mind helping for as long as you need it."

"Great!" Ashe beamed, nearly dizzy with relief. "We'll call tonight your first night of training, so you don't earn any tips. But starting tomorrow, you'll take fifty percent. Got it?"

"What? No, I--"

"If you're helping me, that makes me the lead bartender and you a trainee. Right?" Ashe grinned, knowing he'd already won the argument. "If you acknowledge that I'm the lead, then you have to do as I say and take the tips I say you've earned."

"But..." Dedue's brow furrowed. His shoulders rose and fell in acceptance. "That's not necessary. But I will abide by the lead bartender's instruction."

Ashe chuckled and blushed. He fully expected that whatever bartender Dimitri hired to replace Caspar, they would have more experience than Ashe did and would likely assume the role of lead bartender over him. Ashe didn't mind that at all--he was still new to the job, after all. He couldn't perform the fun tricks other bartenders could, nor had he mastered the art of sympathizing with customers in order to up-sell them shots or overpriced drinks. But right now, with a pocket full of cash and a few nights working alongside his favorite coworker, Ashe's life was looking pretty bright.

"We should exchange phone numbers," Dedue suggested as Ashe began flicking off the under-counter lights behind the bar. 

"Um, what?" Ashe asked, surprised. He'd fantasized about asking Dedue's number in the past. And by "in the past" he meant: just about every single time Dedue sat at the bar prior to his shift, sipping his club soda and lime.

"In case Dimitri finds a replacement before tomorrow," Dedue insisted. "I can let you know."

"Um, okay." Ashe felt the tips of his ears burn hot as he recited his number to Dedue. A moment later, his phone dinged with a text message: A single smiley face from an unknown number. Ashe felt like his heart might just about burst. "Th-thank you. Please, uh, let me know if...if anything changes."

"You too," Dedue said. His arm brushed Ashe's shoulder as he passed, on his way to the exit. "It's late. We should go."

"Y-yes!" Perhaps they weren't going out for pho, as Dedue had suggested earlier, but other than that, it had been an almost perfect night. As the group of Blue Lion employees split up to go their separate ways for the night, Ashe glanced back over his shoulder. It might have been a trick of the light, but he swore he saw Dedue stealing a glance back at him as well.

~*~^~*~

Ashe was only able to close his eyes for two hours before the alarm on his phone sounded. With a groan, he pushed himself up from the well-worn secondhand sofa where he'd propped himself up in a corner after returning home. He hadn't even bothered with his pillow or a blanket, as he'd known how little time he'd had before he'd fallen asleep. He walked to the only door inside the apartment, knocked once, then went inside to wake his brother and his sister, who still slept in bunkbeds that were too small for each of them. As they fought over the bathroom, Ashe made up a quick, nutritious breakfast and some instant coffee.

He'd been sixteen when they'd lost their parents in a freak kitchen fire of the restaurant they owned. Social services had wanted to put Ashe's siblings into foster care, but he'd protested vociferously, stating he could take care of them. The insurance money on the restaurant hadn't covered much--the funerals and a few months’ rent on a studio apartment in the shady side of town--so Ashe had quit school and started working. The new owners of the restaurant allowed Ashe to stay on staff, but as a kitchen helper, not as a server or a cook. Still, he'd been grateful for the arrangement that allowed him to keep what remained of his family together.

Five years later and his brother and sister were getting close to graduating high school. His sister had wanted to drop out when she turned sixteen and get a job to help the family, but Ashe wouldn't hear of it. Each of them were at least going to finish high school. After that, they could move out, or get jobs or try for local scholarships to go to college. If Ashe could ever pay off the credit card that sheltered his debt to bartending school, he'd help either of them pay for a technical school or skill to help them with job placement.

Tonight's tips were going to help with a big chunk of that debt. Ashe couldn't help smiling as he touched the wad of cash in his pocket, even as his brother and sister stormed into the tiny kitchen, still arguing brutally with each other. He fed them each an omelet and half a piece of toast, then hurried them to collect their schoolbags. As a rare treat, he gave them each enough money to buy lunch for the day, earning an awed silence before he pushed them out the door. To club goers and partiers, it might already be the weekend, but for school children, Saturday was just another day.

Maybe I can take them out to a nice dinner tonight, Ashe found himself thinking as he splashed some water on his face and finger-combed his hair. He smiled ruefully at his own reflection even as he thought it; if he had money to spare, it really should go towards the credit card balance first. No time for niceties like family lunches.

Shortly after his brother and sister were on their way to school, Ashe left the apartment as well, treading the familiar path to the restaurant his family once owned. It wasn't open yet, but there were a myriad of chores to be done even so early in the morning, so Ashe tied on an apron and got to work scrubbing pots that wouldn't fit in the dishwasher and peeling vegetables and cataloging the inventory in the huge walk-in refrigerator. All chores he used to do back when he thought, one day, the restaurant would be his.

Ashe still held a dream in his heart that, one day, he would buy the restaurant back. But even he didn't dare admit to himself what a fragile dream that was.

The restaurant's new owner showed up a bit before opening in the early afternoon and paid Ashe for the hours he'd put into preparing the kitchen. Years ago, he'd asked about working there officially as a server or a cook, but the owner had been so obviously uncomfortable by the notion that Ashe had laughed the whole thing off as a joke. He didn't want to risk losing the one thread to his parents' restaurant that he still had, even if that meant taking less pay and working in the background.

After he got home, Ashe crashed out on the couch, catching a few short hours of sleep until the bickering of his brother and sister roused him. As he cooked dinner, he helped with homework and listened to the day-to-day problems of teenagers, offering advice and sympathy. He tried to provide as normal a home-life as possible for his brother and sister, but it was tough juggling two jobs, parental duties, chores and proper sleep. At least he'd finished bartending school; that had been a particularly difficult time as it had him out of the house in the evenings, when his siblings needed help with their homework. He'd lost a lot of sleep back then--in fact, he was just catching up on it now. It had been worth it, though, as it had earned him his best paying job yet.

It helped to work alongside people he counted as friends, too. He hadn't had much of a social life since he'd quit school to work full time. Mercedes had always been a kind and supportive friend, but Ashe had come to love Annette's cheerful, if clumsy, helpfulness. Dimitri was distant but kind as a boss, and Ingrid could come off as a little cold sometimes, but Sylvain was personable and friendly and Felix seemed dependable. And then, of course there was...

Ashe nearly sliced off the tip of his finger as he cut down carrots for stir fry. He pushed thoughts of Dedue out of his head and focused on making dinner. He'd be seeing him shortly; there was no reason to dwell on the color of his eyes right now.

After dinner, Ashe left the clean-up to his siblings while he showered and dressed for his shift at the nightclub. Caspar had always dressed nicely, wearing mostly black with bright red highlights, but Ashe wasn't able to afford flashy clothes. Instead, he dressed in black jeans and collared shirts, usually bought second-hand, but he made sure they were gently worn. The shirt he selected for tonight's shift was a dark blue--one of his favorites because it seemed to shimmer in certain light. It had been quite the find at the secondhand store and he didn't wear it often to keep it from getting worn. He told his reflection firmly that he was _not_ wearing this shirt for Dedue; he was wearing it because he felt like wearing it.

His reflection told him quite frankly that he was lying.

Ashe spent a few last minutes in the apartment impressing the importance of finishing homework over playing video games upon his brother and sister (which he was certain fell upon deaf ears, but he tried anyway) then left for work. The sun was only just beginning to set, painting the normally dull gray buildings with brilliant orange light. For some reason, Ashe's heart felt light and there was a spring in his step. He enjoyed his job--truly, he did--but he'd never quite looked forward to it as much as he was tonight.

"My my, don't you look cheerful," Mercedes said as Ashe slipped in through the employee entrance. She and Annette had arrived just ahead of him and had paused inside the entryway to apply some make-up (apparently the lighting in the bathroom was terrible, or so Ashe had been told). Mercedes’ smile was just a little teasing as she eyed Ashe up and down. "You look very dashing tonight."

"Ah, it's just the shirt," Ashe said, trying to wave away the blush in his cheeks. "I, ah, haven't had a chance to do laundry, so--"

"No, it's not the shirt." Mercedes set a finger against her chin thoughtfully. "I think it's actually the smile you're wearing."

"The--" Ashe covered up his mouth, unable to hide the burn of his cheeks.

"Don't cover it up!" Annette protested. "You look so happy! That smile takes years off your face."

"Now now, Annette, that's not nice," Mercedes chided. "Ashe isn't so old that he needs to hear that."

"But he always looks so tired and serious," Annette argued. "He actually looks his age for once."

"Oh, look!" Mercedes pointed. "Ingrid is here early tonight. You should ask her if we can do her make-up."

"Oh! Yes!" Annette turned, kicking up her heels as she bolted down the corridor towards her next victim.

Mercedes turned back to Ashe. "I'm sorry about her. She means well, she just doesn't say the right thing all the time."

"No, I know that." Ashe forced a laugh, trying not to think about the shadows he knew were under his eyes. "And she's right anyway, so I can't really be mad about it."

"It still wasn't very nice," Mercedes said sympathetically. Her kind smile brought an ache into Ashe's chest. "I know it's been rough for you these past few years, Ashe. I just hope you take the time to enjoy something for yourself for once."

"I'm fine," Ashe assured her. "It was rough for a while, back when I was taking that bartending course, but it's all good now. Really."

Mercedes looked doubtful, but her smile was indulgent. "I still think it could be better, if you'd allow it." She leaned in for a one-armed hug, resting her forehead against Ashe's for a brief moment. She was his oldest friend and the one person who stuck by him when he'd lost everything; Ashe found himself blinking back tears as Mercedes drew away.

"Now that won't do," Mercedes chided. "Let's get to work and stop acting like a pair of saps."

"Right!" Ashe replied, rallying himself. Once Mercedes’ back was turned, he swiped quickly at his eyes. It was Saturday, the club's busiest night. He didn't have time to be feeling overwhelmed with emotion.

The club always seemed larger when it was empty and well lit. The DJs were still just setting up their equipment and servers were spreading out the high top tables around the bar. Ashe greeted a few before stepping behind the bar and beginning his usual pre-opening tasks. He was slightly disappointed that Dedue wasn't already there, but then again, the bouncer usually started his shift an hour later than Ashe's, so he wasn't too concerned.

By the time Ashe was biting his lip to keep from cursing the acidity of lemon juice, Ingrid appeared to set up the cash register for the night's business.

"Did Dimitri call you to let you know the situation?" Ingrid asked, not looking up as she counted out stacks of bills.

"No, he didn't." Ashe felt his stomach sink. Was it possible that Dimitri had already found a new bartender? Would Dedue be working the front door tonight instead of helping at the bar?

Ingrid huffed a sigh. "He probably didn't think it was important for you to know. I think you should be kept in the loop, though."

Ashe's throat suddenly felt tight. He braced for the bad news.

"Dimitri has three interviews lined up already on Monday, but until then he's agreed to let Felix and Sylvain work the front door so Dedue can help you behind the bar. Personally, I think it's a bit of a liability having Felix work the front door, as he has a tendency to go off sometimes, but as long as Sylvain's there to keep the peace, it should be alright in the short term. What's wrong? You look like you might cry."

"No! No, I just--I got some lemon juice in my eye." Ashe gestured to the lemon he was slicing, trying not to feel weak with relief. Dedue was still going to be working with him for the rest of the weekend!

"Oh. Be careful," Ingrid advised. She finished counting out the till, then slid it shut. "It'll be busy, so if you need any help, send a server to come get me. I can't help with drinks, but I can run the register if you need it."

"Thank you, Ingrid." Ashe smiled gratefully. "I'll do my best."

A rare smile from Ingrid. "You always do."

The moment was broken by Annette tripping over nothing as she called out for Ingrid to let her put some make-up on and Ingrid just about vaulted the bar to escape. Ashe laughed as Ingrid ran directly into Mercedes, whose kind smile looked just a touch sadistic as she led Ingrid away to apply "just a touch" of make-up. When he turned back to the work in front of him, he nearly jumped out of his skin to find someone standing at the bar in front of him. He swallowed, eyes tracking up and up before they locked with dark green ones, peering down at him.

"G-good evening, Dedue." Ashe tried clearing his throat--it had come out a little high. "Um, did you want your usual club soda before you start?"

Dedue stared down a moment longer, making Ashe's skin itch uncomfortably beneath his clothes. He found himself irrationally worried that he'd forgotten to brush hair, or maybe there was a piece of food in his teeth and that was why Dedue was staring, but surely one of the women would have said something to him if that were the case. Right?

"My apologies for not thinking to ask this sooner," Dedue started, the timbre of his voice resonating in Ashe's very bones. "But is there some sort of dress code that I should adhere to while working behind the bar?"

"Wh-what?" Ashe stammered, taking in the black muscle t-shirt that clung to every line and ridge of Dedue's chest and shoulders. "N-no, what you're wearing is perf--Gorge--" Ashe turned his head to cough loudly into his shoulder. "What you're wearing is fine, Dedue. Really."

"I can wear a collared shirt tomorrow," Dedue offered, gesturing to Ashe's own button-up.

"No, that's not, um... It's more like I..." The last thing Ashe wanted was to admit that he couldn't afford the types of expensive-label clothing that everyone else seemed to prefer, so he compensated by dressing nicely. "I just like this color, even though the shirt's a little overly formal. What you're wearing is just fine for bartending."

Ashe's mouth went dry as shoulders broad enough for him to sleep on rose and fell in a shrug. "I just wore my usual bouncer clothes. I should have thought to wear something different."

"I really mean it, your clothes are fine," Ashe insisted. Better than fine, really. Ashe was going to have to pinch himself if he caught himself staring. "If you’re ready, I could really use some help."

Dedue nodded and rounded the counter, sidling up close enough that Ashe could feel his body heat. Or maybe that was just his own blood running hot. Ashe set Dedue to filling bowls with chex mix, then surreptitiously slid away from him so he could continue slicing fruit without fear of injuring himself. After that, Ashe showed Dedue how to salt the rims of margarita glasses and tasked him with preparing at least twenty to start--margaritas were one of their most popular drinks, especially at the beginning of the evening. Ashe worked on creating spears of fruit as garnish for drinks, then set them on trays inside the chiller to keep them fresh. Though they worked in silence, it wasn't uncomfortable. Ashe caught Dedue looking over his way once and smiled back cheerily.

"It really means so much, you helping me out like this," Ashe said. Then he chuckled. "I'd like to say I'd do the same for you, but I'm afraid I'd be a terrible bouncer."

"It's not easy," Dedue murmured, head down as he worked.

"No, of course not! I didn't mean to imply that it was." Ashe licked his lips as he stole a glance over at Dedue. "You must spend a lot of your free time working out for this job."

"That's not the hard part," Dedue replied, his expression a twinge regretful. "The fights are easy--most often people posture, but never throw a punch. The hard part is telling someone they can't come in because they don't meet the dress code, or that they don't fit the...vibe of the club."

Ashe cringed inwardly; he had no misconceptions about the types of people who didn't meet the "vibe" of the club. He himself probably couldn't get inside if he wanted to party for a night. "Well, nightclubs have always thrived on exclusivity. I bet some people have learned to expect rejection."

Dedue looked troubled. "Even knowing that, it never gets easier. Or choosing who gets to come in and who can't. It gets...wearying."

Ashe kept his eyes low, focusing on his fruit spears. "I didn't know about all of that. From that perspective, it almost makes my job look easy by comparison."

"I didn't say that," Dedue said quickly enough to make Ashe look up. "People kept shouting drink orders at you all night last night, and some of them were quite rude when they didn't get their drinks right away. I imagine that must have been very stressful to you."

"Actually, ah, it's not so bad." Ashe chuckled softly, thinking of corralling his brother and sister when they were younger and more prone to screaming and tantrums. "I can only make so many drinks within a certain time and I'm well aware of my limits. Each guest only waits as long as it takes for me to get to their order. I can't do any more than that, so I don't let it bother me when they get upset."

Dedue fell still, his deep green eyes once more resting heavily on Ashe. There was something in that look that made Ashe feel as if he were the only person in the room--the only person in the world. It chilled and warmed him at the same time. Finally, Dedue spoke: "That's very--"

But whatever it was, Ashe never found out, because just then the lights of the club dimmed sharply enough to make Ashe feel like he was falling. The front doors of the club crashed open, disgorging Dimitri, Felix and Sylvain from among a throng of amped up party-goers. Ingrid was already there to greet them, shoving a tablet in Dimitri's hands and demanding that he make a decision about something.

"I'll get to it," Dimitri promised, efficiently clicking off the tablet as he approached the bar. Slowly and surely all the staff converged upon the bar: the servers, the DJs, Mercedes from the coat-check, all of Dimitri's friends. Saturday nights always began with a bit of a ritual, a meeting with a certain "gird your loins" type of feel to it, preparation before battle. Dimitri stood at the shortest end of the bar, flanked by his closest friends as he addressed his employees.

"Another Saturday is upon us," the tall blond said dramatically. "I know these nights are hard, but these are what keep us in business. So stay the course and give the best service that you are able and if you are in need of assistance, do not hesitate to tell me or Ingrid. It might get a bit rougher with Felix and Sylvain working the front door, but don't forget about Dedue behind the bar, in case any of the patrons start giving you a hard time."

Dedue nodded sharply. It didn't happen often, but even Ashe knew that sometimes patrons would get a little too drunk and try to grab a server inappropriately. Sylvain and Felix, along with Dimitri and Ingrid, discouraged that type of behavior and usually threw the offender out of the club. Hopefully nothing of the sort would be necessary tonight.

"So let us all raise our glass to--" Dimitri paused. Looked around. Glanced questioningly at Ashe.

"Oh!" Ashe felt his ears burn with shame: He'd completely forgotten about the Saturday night toast! All things fair, it had always been Caspar's task before, but still, Ashe should have remembered. He scampered for the shot glasses, only to find Dedue already lining them up neatly along the bar. With a rushed, grateful look, Ashe grabbed the bottle of Areadbhar vodka and poured a splash into each glass. It was just a taster, really, a shot of liquid courage as Sylvain often called it. Not nearly enough to get anyone drunk, but refined enough on the palate to be both treat and reward. Still blushing, Ashe set the shot glasses up on the bar in easy reach of the assembled employees, ducking his head as he set the last one down before Dimitri.

To his credit, Dimitri didn't mention the slip. He lifted his taster of vodka and solemnly intoned: "To Saturday!"

"To Saturday!" Everyone tipped their glasses back, then set them back down on the counter, the clacks and taps sounding like hail on a rooftop. Ashe kept his eyes low as he collected the glasses to wash them. The shot glasses rattled against each other in his still-shaking hands.

"Are you okay?" Dedue asked with kind concern.

"I just--I can't believe I forgot about the Saturday night shot." Ashe tried for a chuckle, but it came out thin and strained.

"It wasn't a problem," Dedue assured him. "You handled it once you remembered."

"Yes, but--" Ashe swallowed. He did **not** want to cry in front of Dedue. He focused on grabbing more shot glasses so he wouldn't have to look at Dedue. "I really hate letting people down."

His hands shook violently and his heart came to complete stop as he felt the glasses begin to slip through his fingers. The only thought of his mind was turning in his official resignation before Dimitri could fire him over dropping half a dozen shot glasses. Then, suddenly warm, dark hands surrounded his own, cupping them firmly to keep the shot glasses from slipping further. Ashe blinked in surprise then tipped his chin back to stare up at Dedue.

"No one has been let down," Dedue said softly, moving their hands so they could set the glasses safely on the counter behind the bar. Ashe found himself missing the warmth of Dedue's hands as they pulled away from his own. "The best thing for you to do now is forget and move on. Look. Dimitri has already forgotten."

Ashe followed Dedue's gaze towards the DJ station, where Dimitri was listening to something on a set of headphones that had him nodding along with the beat. Beside him, Ingrid was tapping away on her tablet once more. The servers swirled between the tables, setting out bowls of chex mix and smoothing their aprons. Felix and Sylvain stood near the front door, jostling each other good-naturedly as they awaited their cue to open the doors. Not a single person seemed the least bit concerned over the delay of shots.

Even still...it was all Ashe could think about. He could accept his limitations as a junior bartender, he was even comfortable with making patrons wait while he filled orders in the sequence in which they were placed, but to completely forget an assigned task? And an easy one at that? It was something he knew he'd be fixated on for weeks.

"Hey." Body heat and subtle cologne urged Ashe to look up. Dedue offered him a shot glass half full of clear liquid. A glance to the side verified that the bottle of Areadbhar was still out and open. "Join me."

"I-I never--"

"I know," Dedue said kindly. "Think of it as a restart to the night. It'll help you refocus on what you need to do."

Ashe hadn't partaken in the Saturday night shot since his first night working, and only then because Caspar had basically bullied him into it. It wasn't that he didn't like the drink--actually, the vodka was so smooth it went down like water, which, really, was kind of terrifying. It was actually that even that tiny splash of alcohol was enough to make Ashe feel just a little loose, his thoughts slightly more scattered, his smile just a touch easier. The sensation would pass in about an hour, but still. It was a subtle reminder to him that he was likely undernourished from years of scrimping on food and sleep while trying to provide for his brother and sister. And despite the fact that he was a bartender, Ashe didn't really have the means to practice raising his tolerance. During bartending school, he'd taken sips of the drinks he'd mixed and spat more often than he swallowed.

But there was such kindness shining in Dedue's eyes and Ashe knew he needed something to put his error out of his mind. If he continued to fixate on it, his mistakes would only get more and more egregious as the night went on. A restart was exactly what he needed.

Tentatively, Ashe took the shot glass, letting his fingers brush Dedue's.

"You don't usually take the shot, either," Ashe pointed out as Dedue picked up a second glass.

Dedue shrugged. "I don't normally work at the bar either. It's a night for new things. Cheers."

"Cheers." Ashe smiled before tipping back the shot. A night for new things. He rather liked the sound of that.

The overhead lights clicked off with sudden finality just as Ashe and Dedue set their shot glasses down on the counter. The bass started thumping first, then music began blaring from every corner. Colored lights began spinning and the front doors opened to a resounding cheer from the crowd outside.

"It's about to get busy," Ashe said with a sigh that burned.

"Yes," Dedue agreed, setting the glasses in racks within the small industrial dishwasher.

"Hey Dedue?"

"Yes?"

"Thank you." Ashe smiled, already feeling the warmth of the vodka seeping into his bones, steadying his nerves ending and fogging the fringe edges of his brain. It wasn't enough to blur his vision or slur his speech, and certainly not enough to impede his work. If anything, he felt more fluid than his usual awkward self. Though he attributed each of these feelings to his half-shot of vodka, the glowing warmth in his chest he blamed entirely on Dedue's sweet, secret smile. That in itself was more distracting than anything else that had happened prior. Ashe wished he could take a picture to savor the moment, but the bar was already getting rushed and he had to push it out of his mind in favor of pouring drinks.

The night passed in a flurry of drink orders, cash and credit cards, just as it usually did. Speech was nearly impossible, thanks to the music, so Ashe and Dedue didn't talk as they worked, communicating instead through pointing and gestures, holding up fingers to answer the question "How many?" and sliding past each other as they served patrons seated at the bar. Ashe was certain he'd burned through his allotment of alcohol by midnight, but his breath came short and his brain fogged out when Dedue leaned around him to set a glass of water garnished with lemon in front of the guest who had ordered it. For a moment, it had felt like Dedue was putting his arm around Ashe's shoulders and it had taken everything in Ashe to continue focusing on the complicated, layered shots he was pouring.

Time seemed to fly, but there were certain tiny moments that felt as if they lasted far longer than they did, crystallizing in perfect notes of harmony. As both Ashe and Dedue reached for an empty bowl of chex mix, their arms brushed and their eyes caught. Ashe blushed. Dedue's eyes crinkled. Later, they stood side by side, almost touching, as Dedue helped Ashe complete a particularly large order of shots for a bachelorette party, Dedue mimicking every motion Ashe made in order to duplicate the shots precisely. Ashe detected the faintest whiff of mint on Dedue's breath, they stood so close. And later still, one of the beer pulls coughed and sputtered as the keg ran out, splashing the both of them with fizz and foam. Ashe had laughed at first, then fallen abruptly silent as Dedue swiped a thumb over his cheekbone, wiping away a droplet of liquid. Ashe blushed so hard and so fast he went a little dizzy. He quickly grabbed a cloth from his apron and dabbed at the rest of his face and neck, turning away in the hope of hiding his body's sudden interest and arousal. He recited drink recipes over and over in his head until he calmed down.

The drink orders didn't slow until well past midnight; Saturdays always ran late. Most people didn't work the following day, so they would party up until closing time. It was nearly two in the morning by the time Ashe finally put some coffee on to brew and began wiping down the spilled drinks and sticky citrus on the counters behind the bar. Dedue switched out a keg in the taproom, Ashe watching out of the corner of his eye as the club's bouncer easily lifted out the empty keg before slinging in the full one. The inconsistent lights made it hard to see the shift of muscle beneath that thin black t-shirt, but Ashe knew it was there all the same.

His hands are so big, Ashe thought, remembering how it had felt when Dedue cupped his hands to keep from dropping the shot glasses. He shivered at the memory of Dedue's thumb skimming across his face. His mouth went dry at the thought of those hands touching him elsewhere...

Ashe gulped and shook his head, forcing himself to concentrate on wiping down the counter. Dedue was a coworker. Maybe even a friend. A crush was one thing, but lusting after Dedue was another entirely. Surely he could keep it together until Dimitri found another bartender. Then Dedue would go back to his job as the club's bouncer and Ashe would be the bartender's assistant again.

The very idea of that was sobering; Ashe really liked working alongside Dedue.

The music finally became softer, the thudding less frantic; the lights less spinny and slowly turning brighter. The creatures of the night were fleeing, collecting their coats and hurriedly downing glasses of water, as if to stave off the impending nightmare of the morning to follow. Ashe loaded the dishwasher with racks and racks of glasses, steins, bowls and mugs. Dedue began gathering up the garbage and setting it neatly by the back door, replacing the bags in each trash can. Servers wiped down high top tables and as the thudding bass finally stopped, Ashe felt strangely deaf and grounded, as if the lack of music had somehow intensified gravity's effect. Once the dishwasher was as full as it could be, Ashe set it to run and helped Dedue carry the trash bags out to the dumpster.

"Busy night," Ashe commented, his voice strange in his own ears after long hours of percussive bass. "Tomorrow won't be so bad, though. Sundays are always more subdued."

"If it won't be as busy, do you think you could show me how to mix some of the easier drink orders?" Dedue asked as they lingered in the alley behind the club.

"Sure!" Ashe replied cheerily. "In fact, if you wanted to come in a little early tomorrow, I can show you while we're setting up the bar."

"Should I wear something different?" Dedue asked, tugging at the collar of his t-shirt.

"Are you still hung up on that?" Ashe laughed. "You really don't need to--"

Ashe stopped suddenly as Dedue reached out and touched the collar of his shirt. At some point, the top button had come undone and in the heat of the club, Ashe hadn't really noticed it. Now, with a light tug from Dedue, he felt cool night air chilling his skin. He was startled to realize how close Dedue stood, how the scent of mint still lingered on his breath. He'd always noticed how tall Dedue was, but somehow standing close, their difference in height seemed even more exaggerated than usual. He was leaning down slightly, his fingers pinching the fabric of Ashe's shirt.

Is he going to kiss me? Ashe wondered, his mind already rewriting the fact that he was going to get his first kiss by a back-alley dumpster. Part of his mind panicked as he wondered what his own breath smelled like and if it would affect a kiss.

The frozen moment shattered as someone collided with the chain link barring the alley from the street, drunken laughter filling the otherwise silent night. The tension broke as Dedue straightened, letting his hand drop from Ashe's collar.

"I was just thinking it might look more professional if we wore similar clothes," Dedue said, glancing after the drunken revelers. "But I don't have anything in that color."

"Oh." Ashe's head was still spinning. Had Dedue only been looking at the color of his shirt? Was that all it was? He blinked away a moment of vertigo and swallowed. "You should...you should wear green, anyway. It'd look really good with your eyes."

Dedue's smile was small, but seemed to convey deep emotion. "I'll wear green tomorrow night if you will."

"I, um," Ashe thought about what shirts he had in his closet. "I have something green, I think. I'll wear it."

"Good. Green looks good with your eyes, too." Ashe didn't know what to say to that, he just hoped the darkness masked the color in his cheeks. "I'd still like to go out for pho sometime."

"Oh, um, I'd like that, too, but..." It was Sunday now, which meant that later, Ashe would be taking his brother and sister to the restaurant their parents used to own for brunch. It was their only indulgent family meal of the week--at least, until Ashe had to go wash dishes in the back to make up the cost of the meal. "I already have plans for later. I'm sorry."

"I see." Dedue turned to head back to the propped-open door.

Oh no! Ashe realized, slightly panicked. He's going to think I don't want to see him outside of work. I don't want him thinking that I'm not his friend.

"But!" Ashe called after Dedue, making the giant stop and look back. Normally, Ashe would never have thought to make the following suggestion, but the few extra bucks he'd made in tips the night before had him feeling bold. "If you'd like, maybe we can meet up for dinner before our next shift? And I can...go over a few cocktail recipes with you? If you want?"

Dedue's smile was like the first ray of light from the morning sun. "I'd really like that."

"Okay, great." Ashe felt overwhelmed with relief. Meeting up with Dedue before his shift meant he'd lose a little sleep, but right now, he considered it worth it. "Um, text later for where and when?"

"Okay," Dedue agreed.

Feeling giddy, Ashe followed Dedue back inside the club, where Ingrid was already counting out the till for the night.

"Did you two figure out what you're doing with the tips tonight?" Ingrid asked as they approached.

"Fifty-fifty split, right Dedue?"

"Only if you insi--"

"I insist. Fifty-fifty, please."

Ingrid worked whatever cash-register magic that made tips appear on paychecks, then left with the baggie of cash and credit card receipts, as well as the orphaned credit cards of the night. Dedue and Ashe went back to straightening and cleaning the bar, getting it ready for Sunday night bar service.

"Tomorrow will be a good night for practicing drink recipes," Ashe said, folding his apron and leaving it on the counter. "Sundays are still busy, but not as crazy as Fridays and Saturdays."

"I'm looking forward to it."

It was funny, but so was Ashe.

~*~^~*~

Five pm on Sunday found Ashe standing at a street corner that Dedue had texted to meet him at, repeating over and over to himself that this was not a date. This was just a pre-work meeting to discuss mixing drinks that happened to take place at dinner time. That was all.

Right?

Right.

But then, why did he feel so nervous? Ashe felt like he was going to sweat right through his shirt despite the cooling breeze. He'd worn green, just as he'd promised Dedue he would. It was a knit shirt with only three buttons, a lazy collar that gapped just a little around his collarbone, making him feel a little self-conscious, but it was the only green shirt he had available. He'd meant to do laundry, but after brunch he'd been too tired and he'd fallen asleep. He suspected he'd still be tired if he wasn't so nervous about meeting up with Dedue.

He's just a coworker, Ashe reminded himself. This is no different than meeting up with Mercedes or Annette or--

_Oh, it's totally different._

Dedue strolled into sight, head and shoulders taller than anyone else on the street, wearing charcoal gray jeans and a green collared short-sleeve shirt with some sort of black fabric on the sides under his arms, accentuating the perfect V shape from his broad shoulders to his narrow waist. Ashe's mouth went dry and every cocktail recipe he'd ever known fled his brain all at once.

"Hi," Dedue said, almost shyly.

"H-h--" Ashe coughed. "Hey." Not off to a great start for their not-date. "Um, where were you thinking of getting dinner?"

Dedue shuffled for a moment, then held up a small bundle clenched in his fist. "If it's alright, I brought something from home. I thought we could eat at the park here."

"Oh!" Ashe haven't even really noticed the corner park he stood at; now that he looked, there were several picnic tables. Most of the area was grassy with a few neatly arranged flower-box gardens and a small area of swings and slides for children, though it was empty at this time of the evening. "That sounds lovely, actually. I can't remember the last time I ate at a park."

Dedue said nothing, but if Ashe looked closely, he thought he saw relief in his eyes. They followed a cultivated path between flower boxes and sat at opposite sides of a weather-beaten wooden table. If Ashe didn't know better, he'd think Dedue looked nervous as he unwrapped the bundle of boxed food.

"Did you pick something up on the way here?" Ashe asked, wondering if he should offer to pay Dedue back. "Like fast food, or from a convenience store?"

"I made it." Dedue seemed hesitant. "If that's not okay, we can go somewhere."

"No, that's great! I love homemade food." Ashe smiled, trying to put Dedue at ease. "I didn't know you liked to cook. Actually, I don't really know anything about you, Dedue."

Dedue definitely looked uncomfortable as he set one of the boxes down in front of Ashe. The lid was covered in condensation, so whatever it was had been cooked recently. Ashe removed the lid, releasing a puff of steam and a delicious smell.

"Wow, you made this?" The box contained neatly separated foods: tempura vegetables, rice cooked with peas and bamboo, teriyaki chicken and a few sweet-looking cherry tomatoes. "You didn't have to do all of this! I feel like I really put you out of your way, Dedue."

"No, this is nothing, really," Dedue said, glancing down at his own box of food. "I was making dinner for Dimitri anyway, so I just made some extra."

"Mm! This is delicious!" Having grown up with two restauranteurs as parents, Ashe had learned how to identify a well-cooked dish and simple though it was, Dedue's dinner was amazing. "Where did you learn to this? Wait, you said you were making Dimitri's dinner? Is it because he loves your cooking, too?"

"I have no idea whether Dimitri enjoys my cooking or not," Dedue replied, voice soft. "But he eats it just the same. The truth is that I live with Dimitri. Or rather, I rent a room from him. Ever since my mother passed."

"I'm very sorry to hear that." Ashe dropped his gaze, the taste of the home-cooked meal forgotten. "I...know what it's like to lose a parent. Dimitri must be very kind, to give you a place to stay after something like that."

"It happened many years ago," Dedue said, explaining, not dismissive. "Dimitri said he felt responsible and that he'd give me the room for free, but whatever he says, what happened wasn't his fault, so I'm the one who insists on paying. He charges very little, though, so I help keep the apartment clean and cook his meals."

"I never knew that." Ashe toyed with a piece of tempura. "You don't have to tell me anything, but...if you'd like to, I'll listen."

Dedue's smile was a mix of new friendship and old pain. Slowly, he shared the story of how he'd been raised by his mother, who always worked several part-time jobs in order to pay for food and rent. She was the one who had taught him how to cook; his face shined as he spoke of helping her in the kitchen. But then she'd gotten sick and since none of her jobs offered benefits, she wasn't able to pay for treatment. A single tear fell as Dedue spoke of watching his mother die in a hospital bed, where no treatment or pain easement had been offered.

While Ashe had always known Dimitri came from an influential and moneyed family, he didn't know that money came from running one of the largest hospital chains in the country. It turned out that just as Dedue was realizing he was going to be on his own without any resources, and likely in debt from his mother's funeral, Dimitri approached him and told him he'd tried urging the hospital board to do the right thing and approve treatment, but by the time he'd won them over, it was already too late. Out of what Dedue suspected was pity but to Ashe sounded more like guilt, Dimitri convinced Dedue to live with him in his spacious apartment and at least finish high school. While it was clear that Dedue harbored no resentment towards Dimitri, nor considered any of the tragic events to be his fault, he'd been more than a little lost at the time and had eventually agreed to room with Dimitri, on the condition that he at least earn his keep. And when Dimitri decided to use his trust fund money to open up a nightclub, Dedue had readily agreed to work as the doorman/bouncer.

"Wow, that's quite a tale," Ashe said. Though Dedue had spoken softly and evenly, almost without emotion, Ashe could feel the pain and even the hope that the story conveyed. "Thank you for telling me."

Dedue gathered up the empty boxes, folding them back inside the wrapper to carry them. "That's the first time I've told anyone."

"I, but--Sylvain and Ingrid and--"

"Yes, they all know. Most of them are Dimitri's childhood friends, so they were there when it happened. It...took some time to befriend them. Even now, sometimes it's like we live in different worlds."

Ashe could see that. He frequently felt the same way about Dimitri and those who had grown up privileged. Not that he resented them; everyone had their own struggles to face, their own hurdles to overcome, in their own time. But his own struggles weren’t too far off from Dedue’s and somehow knowing that made it easier to talk to him, despite his awkward crush.

As they stood up from the picnic table to begin the walk to work, Dedue met and held Ashe's gaze. "I don't want you to feel as if you have to tell me your story just because I told you mine."

"Wh-what?" Ashe stammered, his dinner shifting unpleasantly. "Who--I mean, what makes you think I have a story?"

He worried that Dedue had noticed his secondhand clothing, the bags under his eyes, his concerns about money. If Dedue had taken notice of him out of pity, well then...perhaps this relationship was already over before it had begun.

Dedue's eyes were steady as he explained: "Mercedes has become a valued friend of mine. She hinted that you were someone I could trust to understand. She didn't say any more than that."

"Oh." Mercedes. The guardian angel who had seen Ashe through the hardest time of his life. He drew a shaky breath. "It...it isn't easy to talk about."

"It never is." Dedue shifted, turning just slightly as if to hint that they should walk. "You don't have to tell me."

"No, I...I think I want to." Ashe was just as surprised to hear the words come out of his mouth as Dedue seemed to hear them. "It's, um, well, everything is fine now, and that's what really matters, but..."

Ashe kept his eyes on the sidewalk, sparkling and glowing in the early sunset, letting Dedue lead them along the familiar path to the nightclub. He told him about the fire. How the insurance hadn't been enough to cover the restaurant's debt. How, at sixteen, Ashe had been forced to let the restaurant go at a loss, to sell his family's house, to quit school, take a job and find affordable housing for himself and his two young siblings. He couldn't tell it the way Dedue had told his story: distant with subtle emotion. Ashe's story was still as raw as black smoke, as sick as cooking grease, as hot as burning flames.

Just before they reached the nightclub, Dedue drew Ashe around the corner of a building, into twilit shadows and offered him a handkerchief. Ashe mumbled something in thanks and took a moment to compose himself. He gritted his teeth, willing his breath to soften and even. Begged his hands to stop shaking. Swiped at his face until he wasn't sure if it was red from crying or from being scrubbed at. All the while, Dedue stood as if on guard, standing close, but not too close. A silent guardian, giving Ashe privacy at the end of his story.

Finally, Ashe emerged from the alley, feeling less shaky, which was about as close as he would come to "calm" until he could put the whole thing out of his mind again.

"Sorry about unloading all of that all of a sudden," Ashe said, trying a smile for Dedue. "It's not something I talk about much."

"I'm sorry."

"No, don't be, it happened a long time ago, and it had nothing to do with you at all."

"No, I mean...I'm sorry I made you feel like you had to tell me." The furrow between Dedue's eyebrows actually gave him a slightly distressed kind of look.

"Oh that." Ashe gave a small, watery laugh. "Actually, even before that, I think I really wanted to tell you. To let you know why it's so hard for me to make plans with you, even though I'd really, really like to spend time with you. You know, outside of work."

"Really?" Dedue sounded surprised.

Ashe felt his cheeks color and he dropped his gaze. "Yes, really. Unless...unless you only wanted to talk drink recipes and we just got massively sidetracked."

A firm hand gripped Ashe's shoulder, starting him into looking up. Dedue's smile was so kind, it almost made Ashe start to cry again. "I'm glad we didn't get around to talking about drink recipes."

Ashe laughed and scrubbed at his face one last time. "Okay, but now we really should focus on work. We're not late yet, are we?"

Dedue shrugged, turning and leading the way to the employee entrance. "Dimitri has never been particularly uptight about start times, so long as the job gets done properly. And you've always done that in the past, so there's no need to worry about it."

"I'll worry anyway, thanks," Ashe said, following behind. "This is the best job I've ever had and I don't want something silly like a late punch to be the reason I lose it."

"I understand," Dedue said, holding the door open for Ashe. "Working for Dimitri has been the best job I ever worked, too."

"That's part of it," Ashe allowed, deciding to be bold, if just for a moment. "But I think working with you was what made it the best for me."

Ashe could have sworn he saw just a hint of color in Dedue's cheeks.

They weren't late as they punched in, but it was later than Ashe's usual arrival time, which meant Mercedes, Annette and the other employees were already working to get the club opened on time. At the bar, Ashe set about his usual opening procedures while talking Dedue through some of the easiest mixed drinks to make--mostly sodas mixed with whiskey or rum, nothing that had to be shaken or stirred. Ashe tasted each drink after Dedue prepared it, spitting most of the drinks out in the sink to avoid getting drunk before his shift, but also able to offer feedback on how each should taste. The leftovers of the drinks were set up on the bar for any employee to grab, as had been the procedure when Ashe was being tested as a bartender on his first day on the job. It was each employees' responsibility to monitor their own alcohol intake pre-shift, but Ashe cast a chastising glance over the bar as Annette grabbed her second drink of the night.

"It's not for me, it's for Mercie," she replied defensively. And it may well have been, but Ashe saw her take a sip as she skipped away towards the coat-check.

"You don't drink, do you?" Dedue asked, trying his hand at a long island iced tea.

"Not really," Ashe said, swiping a quartered lemon into its container. "But I really only turned twenty four months ago, so it's not as if I've had a lot of time to drink. And, you know, drinks are expensive."

Dedue offered the finished drink to Ashe, who sipped without thinking. The sheer alcohol content of long islands always made his mouth pucker, but before he could spit, the doors of the club flew open, causing Ashe to swallow and cough instead. Dedue gave him a worried look as Dimitri, Sylvain and Felix strode into the club. Ingrid had already been there for an hour, opening up registers and seeing to the more mundane tasks of running such a popular establishment.

"Yay, free drinks!" Sylvain whooped, grabbing two mixed drinks off the counter. Felix rolled his eyes at the redhead's antics, but took a glass of his own to sip.

"Did I make it right?" Dedue asked of the long island Ashe still held. "You made a face."

"You made it perfectly," Ashe assured him. "I've just never been fond of these." All the same, rather than placing the glass on the counter, Ashe tucked it beneath the bar. As far as long islands went, this one wasn't bad. And he was as entitled to a free drink as any other club employee, so why not? As Dimitri asked Ingrid if they were ready to open for the evening, Ashe noticed Dedue tuck his latest creation away as well--a seven and seven with a twist of lime rather than lemon garnish. He couldn't help but smile--the drink was just so perfectly Dedue.

As Sylvain and Felix went to open the main doors, Dimitri peeled away from Ingrid long enough to swipe the last mixed drink off the bar, make an appreciative noise as he sipped it, then looked up at Dedue.

"You are sure about this?" Dimitri asked, friendly eyes oddly serious.

Ashe looked up at Dedue in confusion and noted the furtive glance Dedue cast his way before meeting Dimitri's gaze.

"Not yet." Dedue's jaw was clenched. What were they talking about? "May I answer that later?"

"Of course." Dimitri nodded, toasted them both with his drink, then was swept away by Ingrid, who was talking about ROIs, 401Ks and IOUs. Frankly, Ashe was thankful he didn't have to follow that conversation.

"What was that about?" Ashe asked.

"I'll tell you later," Dedue promised. He lifted his seven and seven. "To Sunday."

Ashe grinned and clinked with his long island iced tea. "To Sunday."

Even forewarned by the first sip, Ashe still thought the drink tasted like a lemon cough drop--not that that was Dedue's fault; the drink was supposed to taste like that. Though they'd been practicing more complex recipes, Dedue asked if he could simply focus on getting the proportions correct for the sodas and spirits, to which Ashe agreed. That still left the grand majority of mixed drinks to Ashe, but as he'd expected, Sunday night was easy compared to Saturday. The drink orders came in more steadily, fewer complicated shots were ordered and more people were thinking ahead to work the following morning and ordering simpler drinks all around. The music still played, the lights still flashed and the people still danced, but the last day of the weekend always felt just a touch macabre. For Ashe, though, Sunday meant his final evening shift until Thursday. He'd actually be able to sleep for the next three nights! That was the thought that kept him smiling as he mixed drink after drink for the club's patrons.

Well, the long island iced tea helped, too. He stretched that single drink out from club opening up until just after midnight and felt grateful for the full meal Dedue had made him earlier in the evening; without that, he surely would have been drunk. As it was, he simply rode a sour wave of chilled happiness, glad to be working alongside Dedue once more, even if it was their last night together.

Dedue had seemed stiff behind the bar that first night, and maybe a little fumbling the second night, in the chaotic midst of the Saturday night revelers. But something about him was different tonight. Maybe it was his easy smile that Ashe kept catching glimpses of, or maybe it was the softness in his eyes. All Ashe was sure of was that their hands kept brushing beneath the bar and when they stepped past each other, their shoulders would brush and they'd both smile at each other. Those little touches were even more intoxicating than the drink, making Ashe feel warm and light and floaty.

A familiar song came on and a moment later Annette drifted into sight, dancing with an empty serving tray in hand. Ashe couldn't help but laugh, then realized that the beat was moving him, too, making his head bob, his foot tap, his hip keep time with the thudding base. His hair fell in front of his eyes as he rinsed out a glass in the sink and as he flicked it up out of his eyes, he caught Dedue staring at him from the far side of the bar. Ashe felt a smile slow as honey curl onto his face. He honestly couldn't tell if it was the drink that had him feeling so good, or the home-cooked meal, or the fact that he'd finally told someone about his past or if it was purely the magic of falling for someone as hard as he was falling for Dedue.

Dedue squeezed past Ashe to set a few ordered drinks on the bar in front of guests, then on his way back to the beer taps, he briefly let his hand rest in the small of Ashe's back. Ashe thrilled at the warm, firm touch, aching with loss once the moment passed. When asked to pour a line of shots, Ashe flipped the bottle with a flourish and took a sliding step that carried him just into Dedue's side, their legs and hips brushing for just a moment before they served the shots. At one point in the night, when the beats were loudest and the dancing so vigorous that sweat seemed to lift off the dancers in a steamy haze, Dedue wrung a wet rag over the back of his neck, causing beads of water to cling to the ends of his stark white hair and rivulets to trace the lines of his neck to drip down the back of his collar. He happened to glance over at Ashe just as he was licking his lips at the sight, making Ashe blush, stutter, and spill the drink he was supposed to be mixing.

Is he doing all of this on purpose? Ashe wondered, his heart beating a mile a minute. Dedue let their hands brush as he grabbed a lemon from the bin on the counter. Ashe glanced up and caught the hint of a smile in Dedue's normally stoic expression. Ashe felt the heat in his cheeks as he refocused on cleaning up the spilled drink. This was torture, being stuck in such a small space with the person he'd been crushing on since beginning this job and not being able to touch or speak to him. Was this night ever going to end?

And what do you think will happen when it does end? Ashe asked himself, just a touch melancholy. I still can't go out for late-night food with him. I still don't have the time or the means to seriously date anyone. Even after the twins finish high school, they'll still need me to support them while they figure out what to do next. And I can't just expect Dedue to wait around for me while I get my life together.

Well, then, if this was going to be the height of the relationship between them, Ashe decided he would just have to take advantage of it while he had the chance. Using only the corner of his eye, Ashe took careful aim with the sink's spray hose and just as Dedue turned, he pumped the handle once, soaking the front of Dedue's shirt and making him jump.

"I'm so sorry!" Ashe cried, biting back a smile.

It wasn't a lot of water, but it was enough to paste the front of Dedue's shirt to his chest and abs. Dedue glanced down at himself, his expression bemused. A smile tugging at the corner of his mouth, Dedue leaned down to whisper in Ashe's ear: "I'll get you back for that."

Ashe shivered, goosebumps erupting over his skin, in part by the playful tone, but more for the warmth of Dedue's breath on his skin. Later, when Dedue passed behind him with a scoop full of ice for glasses of water, Ashe jumped and screamed as he felt a cube of ice slide down the back of his neck, beneath his collar and drop to where his shirt was tucked into his pants. He danced about for a moment, twisting around and tugging his shirt free of his pants to let the ice drop free. He shot Dedue a glare of mock irritation.

"My mistake," Dedue replied, face deadpan. But Ashe detected the sparkle of mischief hidden in Dedue's eyes.

As the club slowly began to empty, Ashe and Dedue each grew slightly bolder in their flirtations, touches getting firmer, looks lingering longer. Ashe found himself looking forward to taking out the garbage later, finding he no longer cared whether or not he received his first kiss in a back alley or not, as long as it came from Dedue. If this was the last night they'd get to work together this closely, Ashe was prepared to take full advantage.

Finally, after what seemed like enough hours to last a full week, the music died and the dim yellow lights chased out the few remaining dancers. Ashe and Dedue had long since begun breaking down the bar, throwing out empty bottles and washing glasses, tossing out unused garnish and piling trashbags by the exit leading to the alley. Dedue disappeared through the door leading to the taproom, ostensibly to switch out any empty kegs, and Ashe decided that at that very moment he needed to restock the bar's napkins, which, coincidentally, were stored inside the taproom.

Dedue was already mid-switch from a nearly empty keg to a full one. He tossed the empty keg aside almost lazily, then hefted the full one into place, muscles bulging in his arms and back. Ashe lingered by the shelf of neatly arranged bar supplies as he simply stared. Usually it took two people to wrestle a new keg into place, but maybe from now on, Ashe would just request Dedue's assistance when replacing kegs.

Once the CO2 system was fitted to the new barrel and beer could once again flow, Dedue turned, seeming completely unsurprised to find Ashe standing behind him.

"I needed--" Ashe gestured feebly to the box of paper napkins, but cut off with a startled and excited squeal as a thick arm wrapped around his waist, pulling him in close. He thrilled at the feel of a hand in the small of his back, of breath tickling his hair. For just a moment, he lost himself: reaching his arms up around Dedue's shoulders, fingers sliding through the gathered tail of hair at the back of his neck--softer than Ashe had imagined it would be. Lips were on his and he felt himself pressed backwards into the wall, out of sight of the open taproom door.

It was just one, single kiss, but it was a perfect one. Long, breathless, filled with pent up desire. Ashe tipped his head back and Dedue's tongue tested his lips lightly. Ashe's mouth came open and the kiss deepened: tongues and teeth and soft, swallowed groans.

Dedue pulled back far too soon in Ashe's opinion. Ashe took a shuddering breath, trying to focus on the fact that they were both still at work, but it was hard when Dedue's chest heaved with breath like that, or that his lips were still wet with Ashe's kiss. He wanted those hands back on him, he wanted to be crushed against that body and he wanted--

I can't, Ashe remembered, reality crashing around him like the angry beat of a new song. This is the last night he'll work the bar with me. And I don't have time to date.

"We should--" Ashe glanced around, trying to remember why he'd come into the taproom to begin with (other than stare at Dedue) but his mind turned up blank. "We need to, um, take out the trash."

Dedue nodded, taking one further step back before exiting the taproom. Ashe took a moment longer to steady himself. His heart was likely to beat itself to death against his ribs if it didn't slow down. His skin felt flushed and parts of him still tingled with the sensation of Dedue's touch. It had been so nice to feel wanted, desired; too bad it would be fleeting for the both of them.

When he still couldn't remember what he'd needed from the supply shelf, Ashe grabbed a box of cocktail umbrellas and closed the taproom door behind him. Dedue already stood by the door to the alley, gathering up heavy bags of trash. Ashe tossed the box onto the bar and followed, grabbing a bag as Dedue propped the door open for them.

They didn't speak--didn't even really look at each other--until the bags had disappeared into the depths of the dumpster. Then Ashe took a deep breath, forced a smile he didn't feel and met Dedue's gaze.

"Earlier, that was..." Ashe paused, fumbling as the right words failed to form. "Right now, I can't really..." Wow, this was hard. "What I mean to say is thank you. For helping me this weekend. And for...for everything else. Thank you."

Dedue gazed down steadily at him, a tiny furrow forming between his brows.

"It's just that, um... For me, it's like..." Why was it so damn hard to get the words right?! "I told you earlier about--about my family. I have to be there for my brother and sister, so I can't... I can't... Even though I really want--" Ashe's voice broke. He cut himself off and stared determinedly down at the ground, blinking back tears.

"I do understand," Dedue said finally. "I really admire the way you put your family before yourself. I would never want you to put me before them."

Ashe nodded, a painful knot tightening in his throat, making speech impossible.

"But I also think," Dedue continued, voice entirely even, "That sometimes it's okay to put yourself first."

Ashe choked on a sob, his shoulders shaking traitorously. He'd already done something for himself, hadn't he? They were drowning in debt, thanks to the bartending course he'd selfishly taken. He'd missed several weeks’ worth of homework assignments and dinners with his siblings. How could he possibly think of missing anything more with them just now? He wasn't allowed to do anything else for himself; not until the credit card was paid off, or until both his brother and sister had moved out and could support themselves. And Ashe wouldn't be so selfish as to ask Dedue to wait for him that long.

Dedue sighed, the sound soft and subdued. "We should go back inside and finish."

Ashe nodded, refusing to lift his head. If he met Dedue's gaze just then, he'd lose the battle against tears. He waited for Dedue to take the lead, then shuffled along after him. Just as Dedue set his hand on the door, he paused. Looked back over his shoulder.

"I've been meaning to tell you. Dimitri said that I can keep working at the bar and he'll hire a new bouncer. I've already scheduled a bartending course, so you won't have to worry so much about teaching me. Unless you'd rather I go back to working the door?"

Ashe's head snapped up, leaving his jaw behind. Dedue wanted to keep working with him? Prep together, mix drinks together, close up together just like this every night? That would be a dream, but--

"You shouldn't--I mean, I...I can't let you change your whole job just because of me," Ashe insisted, his eyes dropping once again. "I've really enjoyed working with you and getting to know you, all of it, but you're an amazing bouncer and it would be wrong for you to quit that just because of...because of me."

"Ashe." He paused as if waiting for Ashe to look up. Ashe refused; it hurt too much to break his own heart. "Dimitri only asked me to be his bouncer because people find me intimidating and I had no other skills that could help the club. It wasn't something I chose for myself. And actually if..." Dedue hesitated. Ashe lifted his chin, curious but still not looking up at Dedue. "If Dimitri had decided to install a full kitchen, I would have asked to work as a cook. Bartending isn't the same, I know, but it's closer to cooking than working at the door."

Ashe finally dragged his gaze up, searching Dedue's face for a lie.

"But if you'd rather we not work together anymore, I can still ask Dimitri--"

"No!" The word ripped from Ashe's throat like a scab from a wound. "If it's what you want, then it's what I want, too. But I--I still don't think I can--that we can--"

Unable to get any more words out, Ashe tentatively reached out, fingers brushing against Dedue's. Dedue flipped his palm out, entangling their fingers. He bent down slowly, giving Ashe time to pull away. Despite his protests, Ashe tipped his chin up, their lips meeting in a brief, gentle kiss.

"I'm not asking you for anything," Dedue said, his voice a thrumming rumble that Ashe felt in his chest like the beat of the dance music. "When you have time to give, I'll take it. When you don't, we'll still have the bar."

It was too much. The kiss, the work, the promise--all of it. Too much. Ashe felt his resolve crumble at the same time he lost the battle to hold back tears. When his head fell forward, it hit the slab of muscle that was Dedue's chest. He felt arms encircle his shoulders, a warm hand in the middle of his back. He clutched fistfuls of Dedue's shirt, wetting it with tears as he shook with held-in sobs.

Long moments passed before Ashe was able to pull himself together, and when he could, he almost didn't want to. He felt warm, safe and protected--things he hadn't felt since before his parents had died. He'd learned to live for his brother and sister ever since they'd lost everything. But maybe...maybe it was time he started taking small things just for himself.

Dedue didn't say anything, nor did he shuffle or shift to suggest that they hurry back inside. After all, they were still on the clock, but somehow, right now, that didn't seem like it mattered. Ashe took in a lungful of night air, let it out slowly and backed away from Dedue, regretting the moment those strong, warm arms broke their grip on him. He carefully dabbed at his face with his sleeve and dared a small smile in Dedue's direction.

"I'd really love it if we could keep working together. Please don't go back to working the front. And while I can't promise you a lot of my time...what little I have to spare, I'd like to spend it with you. If that's...good enough."

Calloused fingers caressed his face, a thumb swiping away a final tear. Peeking up through his lashes, Ashe could see that Dedue was smiling, his eyes glittering in the dim light.

"It's enough, Ashe. Just tell me when you have time. I would love to cook for you again."

"I'd love that," Ashe said, awed and happy and completely, totally, thoroughly in love.


	2. Family Dinner

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ashe and Dedue have been dating for a few months when Ashe finally invites him over for dinner and to meet his brother and sister.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really intended this to be a one-shot, but you guys have been SO KIND in the comments that I decided to write two more chapters. By popular request, this first chapter is Dedue meeting Ashe’s family. I couldn’t find a canon reference to Ashe’s younger siblings’ names, so I’ve decided that they are twins and made up names for them. Sorry in advance if Fire Emblem decides to give them names in the future!

"Move over, you’re on my side!"

"I was here first! Stop kicking me!"

"Ashe! Cole is on my side of the couch!"

"Cinda's lying! Ow!"

"No fighting," Ashe shouted from the kitchen, barely taking notice of the fight in front of the TV. He turned from the sink where he'd been fastidiously washing some shellfish and gave the pan of Spanish rice on the stove a quick flip. "Is the bathroom clean, like I asked?"

A too-silent pause, then, in unison: "Yes."

Which, of course, meant it wasn't. "I told you we have company coming over for dinner! What if he needs to use the bathroom?"

Ashe glanced up in time to see his younger sister, Cinda, whispering something to her twin. He nodded and they both got up from the couch, but not without an excessive amount of elbowing each other in the process.

"And don't just shove everything into the tub and pull the curtain!" Ashe called after them. "There's two of you and that bathroom is tiny, so it had better be spotless!"

They were bickering again already, Ashe could hear them through the walls. Something heavy thudded to the floor of the tub, loud enough to make Ashe pause and listen just to make sure one of the twins hadn't brained the other. When the arguing resumed, he sighed and shook his head.

What was I thinking? Ashe wondered, scrubbing a clam shell that, in all likelihood, was already perfectly clean but he couldn't seem to stop himself from obsessing over every detail. Dedue was coming over for dinner. That meant this had to be the most perfect paella ever served. Not that Dedue would hold it against him if it wasn't, but Dedue was an amazing cook and Ashe hadn't really had an opportunity to show off his own cooking skills. Sure, sometimes he made lunches for them when they met up before work, but those were quick and easy meals, nothing fancy. Ashe couldn't really afford fancy food. But the restaurant he worked at had accidentally ordered double their usual amount of seafood and it hadn't been able to fit inside the freezer, so the owners had been selling the excess to their staff for pennies on the dollar, just so it wouldn't go bad. Ashe had happily traded half his day's wages for an icebox full of clams, mussels and shrimp. He'd been so giddy, he'd even mentioned it to Dedue on their way to work and how he was thinking of cooking paella with it all.

"I've never had paella," Dedue had said.

"Then you should come over tomorrow night!" Ashe had replied without thinking. Dedue agreed before Ashe could take it back (not that he _wanted_ to take it back, his anxiety had suddenly kicked in and sent him into a panic) and asked what he could bring with him. Ashe remembered saying something about dessert while he quietly panicked. Dedue hadn't met his brother and sister yet, hadn't been to Ashe's tiny apartment where he slept on the couch because there wasn't enough room for another bed. Everything he owned was secondhand or picked up for free off of street corners on garbage day. While Ashe was proud of the tiny apartment, having sacrificed his education and his family's restaurant in order to keep his family together, he could also see it through an outsider's eye and he was embarrassed by what Dedue was about to learn of him.

Ashe wasn't even one hundred percent sure that he and Dedue were really dating. It wasn't as if Ashe had a lot of time to dedicate to such a venture--even if there was nothing he wanted more. They met up most nights just prior to their shift together at the Blue Lion Nightclub and took turns bringing home-cooked meals to share. Twice they'd gone out for late-night/early-morning food after their shift ended and once Ashe had accompanied Dedue to the gym. He hadn't realized that Dimitri, Felix, Sylvain and Ingrid were all going to be there, though, and he'd felt out of place. The gym wasn't even a gym so much as it was a fitness club where everyone wore expensive sweat-wicking clothing, coordinated their training through professional trainers and bought expensive fruit smoothies afterwards. The only thing Ashe had liked about the gym was watching Dedue press a barbell that looked heavier than most cars, but seeing that had left him feeling slightly...exposed as his threadbare sweatpants didn't hide very much.

Even though they didn't spend a lot of time together outside of work, Ashe and Dedue texted each other throughout the day, often long after Ashe should have gone to sleep so he could be fresh for his second job. It had actually been painful when Dedue started taking his bartending course, as they lost even the time to meet up before work. The class schedule even conflicted with some of their shifts, so Dimitri had brought in a temporary bartender to help out. The class had only recently finished and their recent "separation" might have been part of the reason Ashe had invited Dedue over for dinner without fully thinking it through.

As voices from the next room rose in a crescendo of accusations and threats, Ashe heaved a heavy sigh. Was it too late to just leave the paella for the twins and ask to go out to dinner with Dedue instead of eating in? Surely that would be preferable to putting up with the twins for the duration of a meal.

Just then, there was a knock at the door and Ashe nearly burned himself as he secured foil over the top of the pan. Torn between wanting to answer the door and wanting to run his fingers under cold water, he failed to notice the sudden silence in the next room.

Then: "I'll get it!" Footsteps thundered through the apartment, Cole and Cinda fighting to be the first one to answer the door while Ashe protested feebly, trying to beat them to the door, but knowing it was impossible. He stood in the doorway of the kitchen as his brother and sister yanked the door open at the same time.

It was almost comical to watch as Cole and Cinda tilted their heads up and up and up to meet Dedue's gaze. Even from where he stood, Ashe could see their jaws drop as they took in the sheer size of him. As Dedue looked down at them, Ashe tried seeing them through Dedue's eyes. Cole was very nearly the same height as Ashe now--which didn't make him tall by any means, just taller than his sister--with slate-gray hair and an angled, bony look that had more to do with a sudden growth spurt than malnourishment; no one went hungry in Ashe's house. Cinda stood only as tall as Ashe's shoulder and her hair was a pale gray that looked almost silvery. She usually kept it cut short, but it was long and wispy right now, just touching her shoulders. Ashe made a note to ask her later if she wanted to go and get a haircut; Cinda rarely asked for anything for herself. Both twins had hazel eyes and a smattering of freckles across their cheeks, making their family resemblance impossible to ignore.

"Good evening," Dedue said after an awkward pause of the twins just staring at him. He glanced past them to where Ashe stood in the kitchen doorway. "I brought cupcakes for dessert."

Ashe started to say thanks, but the twins spoke over him, loudly and obnoxiously in unison (which they hardly ever did anymore).

"Are you dating our brother?" they asked.

Ashe sputtered, his cheeks aflame. "That's not--"

"Yes," Dedue said simply.

Ashe felt faint.

Cinda tipped her head and narrowed her eyes, as if evaluating Dedue on his appearance alone. Cole was more interested in the wrapped parcel in Dedue's hand.

"What flavor cupcakes?" he asked, because that was clearly the more important issue.

"I made different flavors," Dedue replied.

"You made them?" Cinda asked, voice skeptical.

"Will you two invite him in?" Ashe called, a hissing from the pan reminding him that he had food on the stove. "And don't you dare eat one of those cupcakes before dinner! Don't even lick the frosting."

"Aw," the twins whined in unison. Ashe ducked back inside the kitchen to make sure nothing was burning. He heard the door close and the soft thrum of Dedue's voice. The presence of that voice in his own home was sending hot and cold thrills shooting through Ashe's blood, doing strange and wonderful things to his body. He didn't think he'd ever been quite so terrified yet turned on at the same time.

Ashe was just setting the shellfish into the pan when Dedue appeared in the doorway of the kitchen. Ashe tossed a lock of hair out of his eyes and smiled up at him. "Sorry about the twins. I swear they usually have better manners than that."

"I don't mind." Dedue set his parcel of cupcakes on the counter and watched Ashe silently for a moment. "Should I not have said anything earlier? About us dating?"

Ashe felt his cheeks heat up again, but maybe that was just from standing over the stove. "Ah, no, that was...it's fine. I mean, we are, aren't we?"

"Yes, but I wasn't sure if you had told them yet."

"Perhaps not...exactly," Ashe admitted. "But I wasn't really hiding it, either. I just, um..." Cole and Cinda were Ashe's whole life, the reason he'd quit school and worked two jobs tirelessly. Dating anyone almost felt like a sort of betrayal, like he was taking time away from them for something selfish. "I hadn't figured out how to tell them," Ashe finished lamely. Mostly as a distraction, he gestured to the potted plant in Dedue's hand with a spatula. "What did you bring?"

"It's mint," Dedue said, looking slightly embarrassed. "I didn't know if you had any fresh herbs."

Ashe beamed. "That's very kind of you. Here, I'll put it by the window."

As Ashe moved to take the tiny plant, Dedue stooped slightly, the way he normally did for a kiss. But then he hesitated, as if unsure it was allowed. Ashe solved the dilemma by rising up on his toes to press a kiss to Dedue's lips. It was quick and chaste, as Ashe still had a meal to attend to, but Dedue's warm smile afterwards sent shivers running through Ashe's chest.

And, of course, that was the exact moment the twins appeared in the doorway of the kitchen.

"We wanted to ask you something," Cinda said in a demanding tone that reminded Ashe of his mother.

"Be nice to our guest," Ashe reminded her as he set the plant on the windowsill. "Or I'll eat the cupcake Dedue brought for you."

Cinda rolled her eyes, knowing an empty threat when she heard one. "We're not being mean to him."

"Yeah, we just wanted to know if he'd played Battle Brothers before," Cole chimed in.

"I have," Dedue said, voice soft. "But it's been a while."

"Great! Come play with us!" Cole and Cinda each grabbed one of Dedue's hands, as if they could tow him out of the kitchen. Ashe nearly laughed--even if they threw all their strength into it, he doubted they could make Dedue budge an inch.

"Oh." Dedue looked surprised. He glanced back at Ashe, unmoved despite the twins urgent tugging. "Can I help you here?"

"No, he hates it when anyone else is in the kitchen while he's cooking," Cinda answered, cutting off Ashe's response.

"And we never have anyone new to play against," Cole added. "Ashe is always too busy."

Ashe's heart twisted at that; it wasn't that he didn't want to play video games with his brother and sister, it was just that two jobs, homework and sleep would always come first. They had to, if he was going to keep paying their rent.

"Are you sure?" Dedue asked, still looking to Ashe for an answer.

"The little gremlin is right," Ashe said, ignoring Cinda's gasp of outrage. "I prefer to cook alone." Although, that rule was mostly to keep the twins out of his hair while he cooked; he didn't think he'd mind standing side by side at the stove with Dedue. "Just so you know, the version of Battle Brothers we have is kind of old. I think they're up to the seventh edition now and we have the fourth."

"Which is the best version, as anyone knows," Cinda scoffed.

"C'mon, play with us!" Cole demanded.

Even so, Dedue sent Ashe one last questioning look. Ashe smiled and nodded before turning his focus back on the paella. Dedue allowed himself to be pulled into the living room, where the twins chatted enthusiastically at him while setting up the game. After their parents' death, the three of them hadn't been able to afford many luxuries, which included the newest video game systems and games. The system they had was at least two versions out of date, but at least that meant it was easy to find used games at cheap prices. The twins never complained, but Ashe knew they'd each trade a vital organ or two in order to afford the latest gaming system. They were in their last year of high school, though, so maybe they'd start working soon and they could all afford a bit of luxury.

Although, if Ashe was honest, he'd rather each of them go to college, even if that meant supporting them for a few years more. Cole seemed convinced and had even visited a few of the local community colleges, looking into different courses of study. Cinda was more resistant, insisting that she'd rather start working right away. She'd always been the more independent of the pair.

The kitchen looked out into the tiny area that served as the dining room, and beyond that, the living room (which also served as Ashe's bedroom). As he cooked, he watched Dedue and the twins play a fighting game with cartoon-like characters hitting each other with everything from kicks and punches to magical blasts and baseball bats. It was the twins’ favorite game and had been for years--which meant they had basically mastered the art of teaming up on a third person and destroying them. Poor Dedue didn't stand a chance.

Still, it was actually rather endearing, seeing Dedue sitting on the couch bookended by his brother and sister. The laughter from the other room warmed Ashe's heart, making him think it might not have been such a bad idea to invite Dedue over for dinner after all. Then, suddenly, Cinda was standing on the couch, screeching something at her brother for "cheating" and of course Cole said something scathing in return. As the two of them leapt at each other like professional wrestlers with Dedue between them, Ashe caught himself wondering if they were too old to be put up for adoption.

"Cole! Cinda! Sit down right now or--" Ashe couldn't finish the threat. Dedue had very gently blocked Cole with an arm across his chest, pinning him to the couch and had caught Cinda beneath his other arm as she'd jumped for her brother. She hung between Dedue's hip and arm like a sack of potatoes, looking both surprised and confused as to how she'd gotten where she was.

"Sorry," Dedue said, glancing back at the kitchen. "I didn't want them hurting each other."

"That's fine." The last thing Ashe would ever believe was that Dedue meant to hurt anyone, least of all his siblings. "Just put them both out on the stoop. I'm sure someone will want them. That means more paella for you and me, Dedue."

"But Ashe!" The twins shouted in protest.

"Oh, did you actually want to eat tonight?" Ashe asked, feigning surprise. "Then come set the table. No arguing or I'll forget to feed you both."

Cole and Cinda muttered rebelliously as Dedue released them, setting Cinda down gently on her feet. They rounded the couch and collected the plates and silverware Ashe set on the counter, setting the flimsy folding table they used for meals. Ashe wasn't too surprised to see Dedue fastidiously cleaning up the living room, setting the video game controllers neatly aside, turning off the system and the TV as well as straightening the couch cushions. He didn't have to do any of that, but it warmed Ashe's heart just the same.

Cinda took charge of pouring homemade pink lemonade into everyone's glass as Cole tweaked the table settings with an aesthetic eye. The twins were only twelve when their parents died, but they'd been pressed into service at the restaurant just as Ashe had been. Dinners were a familiar ritual, one that hadn't changed in five years since their loss.

"You sit here," Cinda directed Dedue, pointing to the fourth table setting. Dedue sat as directed, careful to keep from leaning his weight on the wobbly table. Ashe found himself embarrassed again; Dedue lived with the owner of the Blue Lion Nightclub. Surely their dining room table didn't threaten to collapse under slight pressure.

The moment passed as Ashe set the pan of paella in the middle of the table. He was proud of how it had turned out, even achieving the elusive golden-brown crust at the bottom, called the socarrat. The clams and mussels had all popped open, spilling their juices into the mix, the shells lending to the dish's aesthetic component. Still, he was just a bit nervous as this was the first real bit of cooking he'd ever done for Dedue.

"Go easy on me," Ashe said, smiling nervously. "It's been years since I've made this and the last time didn't turn out very well."

Cinda rolled her eyes. "He couldn't get the bottom to brown last time. It still tasted good."

"I like it when the rice is softer anyway," Cole chimed in. "Even though it's supposed to be a little crispy."

"I'm sure it's perfect," Dedue assured Ashe, who was trying not to blush as he served the paella.

As usual, the twins jousted with their plates, trying to be the first one served. Ashe reached around both of them to grab Dedue's plate, holding his breath as he set the laden plate back down on the table. It didn't help that his mind kept showing him images of dropping the plate in Dedue's lap. His hands shook until the plate was safely set down. He wasn't sure which of his siblings he served first; the taunts and jeers were the same either way. By the time he served himself, Ashe had worked himself into a nervous state. What if the dish wasn't as good as he thought it was? What if Dedue didn't like it? Worse, this was Dedue's first time eating paella--what if Ashe ruined the experience for him by serving something subpar?

Dedue had waited patiently to eat until everyone was served, though the twins had eagerly dug into their own plates before Ashe even sat down. When Dedue still didn't make a move to eat, Ashe glanced up shyly. Dedue's brows were just slightly furrowed, silently asking if everything was okay. Ashe forced a smile and picked up a fork, nodding to Dedue's plate. Dedue still waited to take his first bite until Ashe scooped up his first mouthful.

Probably could have cooked the rice for a tiny bit longer, Ashe thought, internally critiquing his own dish. I wish I'd thought to pick up fresh parsley. Parsley flakes are not the same.

"This is really good," Dedue said, slowly and thoughtfully. "There are so many flavors, but they all complement each other amazingly well. I can taste how fresh the seafood is."

"Thanks, but you don't have to--"

"It _is_ good, don't say it isn't," Cinda said, kicking Ashe's chair under the table.

"Even if the rice is a little hard," Cole added. Cinda lobbed a shrimp shell across the table at him.

"Stop!" Ashe caught Cole's wrist as he tried to return fire with a clam shell. "No throwing food at the table. I shouldn't have to tell you that in front of a guest!"

"Fine," the twins muttered, voices overlapping in sullen dissonance. They still shot a glare at each other, promising cold vengeance later when their older brother's back was turned. Ashe released Cole's wrist in time to see a distant expression on Dedue's face as he chewed thoughtfully.

"Is it--are you--did it--" Ashe stammered, worried that maybe a shard from one of the shellfish had broken off. "Does it taste okay?"

Dedue was silent a moment longer, still staring off into the distance. When he met Ashe's eyes, his expression was unreadable. "Is there saffron in this?"

"Not as much as there should be." Ashe flushed; saffron was expensive! "I did steep the saffron in the stock before adding it, but really the recipe calls for twice as much."

"I haven't had paella before, but this tastes like the perfect amount of saffron. It's subtle and doesn't overtake the other flavors." Dedue smiled kindly. "Some chefs use expensive ingredients to cover up their lack of skill. Your careful use of saffron allows the rest of the dish to shine."

Ashe wasn't sure if "too poor" was the same thing "being careful" with the saffron, but he couldn't put all of that into words--not with Dedue complimenting his dish--so he just blushed and scraped a clam out of its shell.

"You must have a really good tongue," Cole said, scraping up the last vestiges of rice on his plate.

Ashe froze solid, hoping against hope that he'd heard his younger brother wrong. Dedue blinked, taken aback. Even Cinda dropped her jaw.

Cole looked up, a confused expression on his face. "What? He could taste the saffron even though it's really really light. I couldn't taste the saffron and I smelled it earlier when Ashe was cooking it."

Ashe nearly went dizzy with relief. "Cole, you mean palate. He must have a good palate to taste the saffron."

Cole rolled his eyes. "You don't taste with your palate. That's the roof of your mouth. You taste with your tongue."

"Be that as it may, you still say palate. You don't compliment someone on their tongue."

"Yeah, he might have thought you were talking about his--"

"Seconds?" Ashe asked, abruptly cutting off his sister. "Here, keep eating. Shellfish is best fresh, not reheated." He scooped generous portions onto each of the twin's plates, not trusting himself to meet Dedue's gaze. God, but it had been a terrible idea to invite Dedue over for dinner. Well, that was one mistake he didn't have to repeat ever again. Or, at least not until after the twins moved out.

"Do you cook, too?" Cinda asked Dedue. "You said you made the cupcakes."

"I don't have any professional training, but I do enjoy cooking and baking," Dedue replied.

"You work at the same club as Ashe, right?" Cole asked. "What do you do?"

"I used to work at the front door," Dedue explained, flashing Ashe a very small smile before continuing. "I recently finished a course in bartending, so now I work at the bar with your brother."

"Our brother should have gone to school for cooking," Cinda muttered, dragging her fork through her rice, making patterns and designs. "Bartending isn't the same."

"Cinda, we've been over this," Ashe counseled gently. "Cooking school is too expensive and takes far too much time. Besides, most restaurant chefs work their way up through the kitchens without ever going to school."

"By that logic, you should be cooking at the restaurant by now," Cole pointed out. "Instead of just being their kitchen boy."

Ashe ducked his head. He'd told Dedue all about his second job, even the fact that the restaurant he worked at used to belong to his parents. He'd even admitted that they paid him under the table rather than with a paycheck. If he'd worked for a different restaurant and earned a real paycheck, he would likely have been a cook by now. But every time he thought about leaving his parents' restaurant, he felt a little prick of pain and shame in his heart. And, more practically, it was nice to be paid in cash every day, rather than wait for a paycheck at the end of the week.

"Finish your dinner," Ashe directed, deciding to ignore his siblings. "Don't let perfectly good paella go to waste. How much homework do you guys have tonight?"

"None," they answered in unison with matching wide-eyed innocence.

"Liars," Ashe said flatly. "Don't take too long cleaning the kitchen if you have a lot of homework to do."

"But Dedue ate too, so he should help us clean the kitchen," Cinda bargained.

"I don't mind," Dedue offered.

"No," Ashe said sternly. "Dedue is our guest. And he made dessert. He's not helping you clean the kitchen."

"What do you like to cook, Dedue?" Cole asked, artfully changing the subject before his sister and older brother could start a fight neither would win. "Or do you prefer baking?"

"I like cooking more, but baking is enjoyable every now and then," Dedue replied. "I like seafood dishes like this one. It actually reminds me a little of my mother's shrimp biryani."

"What's that?" Cinda asked.

"It's a shrimp and rice dish, almost like this one but with different spices. It's Indian food."

"You should make it for us sometime," Cole suggested.

Ashe sighed. "We are not making demands of our guest. Are you both finished? Good, get to work cleaning up."

The twins groaned and voiced protests, but as they spoke over each other, neither argument sounded coherent. Despite their obvious reluctance, the twins began gathering up the dishes and obediently carrying them to the kitchen.

"I really don't mind helping," Dedue offered again.

Ashe shook his head. "This is just about the only chore they have. You'd spoil them if you helped."

"Hey!" Cinda called over the counter separating the kitchen and the dining area. "If we finish cleaning the kitchen fast, can we all play Battle Brothers?"

"Didn't you just say you had homework?" Ashe replied tartly.

"But we never get to play with four players." Cole looked out over the counter, adding his puppy-eyes to Cinda's. "Please?"

Ashe was prepared to say no, but then Dedue shot him a pleading look and he simply melted. That wasn't fair! It had taken him years to build up an immunity to his siblings' begging, now he had to fight Dedue's puppy-eyes too?

"Fine," Ashe sighed. "But that kitchen better pass inspection. And only one game. Homework right after."

"Five games," Cinda bargained.

"Two," Ashe replied.

"Four!" Cole countered.

Ashe rubbed his forehead. "Three games. That's it. If the kitchen is perfect."

"Okay!" The twins spun and got to work scrubbing dishes and putting away leftovers.

Ashe nudged Dedue with his elbow. "That was dirty. Taking their side."

Dedue looked chagrined. "I couldn't help it. They look like you."

Ashe laughed. "Come on. Let me actually teach you the game before they finish cleaning the kitchen."

"I've played Battle Brothers before," Dedue said, following Ashe to the living room. "But I think it was a different version than this one."

"Yeah, this is one of the older ones and the controls are a little clunky. And the twins play it obsessively, so it’s hard to learn on the fly."

Dedue had done such a good job tidying up the living area earlier that Ashe barely recognized it. It took him a moment to find the TV remote, which had been laid, quite obviously, in the middle of the coffee table, but he was used to looking for it wedged between couch cushions. Ashe was grateful for the twins’ banter in the background because he had no idea what he and Dedue were supposed to talk about as he waited for the ancient video game to boot up.

"Here." Ashe handed a game controller over to Dedue. "The twins always play the same two characters and they like to team up against other players. I suggest you pick one of these--" Ashe moved his cursor over three characters on the selection screen, "--because they'll have the best advantages over the twins' characters."

"Which character do you play?" Dedue asked.

Ashe confirmed his selection as one of the three he'd just been showing to Dedue. He didn't play often--he much preferred to sleep whenever he could--so he only had one character he knew fairly well. Even so, he rarely won a match against the twins anymore, even when he could convince them to play one-on-one.

Dedue selected one of the other two characters and Ashe picked a map. The game counted down, then announced "Battle!" in a resounding command that was echoed by the twins in the kitchen.

"You probably saw this earlier, but the twins always start the battle with a chase," Ashe said, leaping his character around the various platforms around the level. "Just get used to moving for a minute. These controllers are old and the buttons are kind of...worn." Stores didn't carry these controllers anymore, or else Ashe would have been tempted to buy new ones. As it was, he'd become a bit of a self-taught expert at taking the controllers apart and cleaning them to keep them functioning as well as they did.

Ashe continued giving Dedue a brief overview of the controls, the levels, and, most importantly, the twins' strategies--most of which involved Cinda's character getting into melee range while Cole's character hid somewhere to deliver devastating blows from a distance. The best strategy was always to seek out Cole's hidden character first, but of course his character moved fast and was difficult to catch, while Cinda's character excelled at chasing and pinning down opponents. They were a great team--in the game. In real life, they might as well have been each other's arch-nemesis.

After their third practice match, Ashe realized that the apartment had grown suspiciously quiet. He twisted around on the couch to look back at the kitchen. Cinda and Cole each peered back over the counter, eyes wide over frosting-smeared mouths.

"Are you eating Dedue's cupcakes?" Ashe demanded, jumping to his feet.

"We were going to bring you yours," Cole said quickly, swiping at his mouth like some kind of animal.

"We didn't want to walk in front of the screen," Cinda declared. "That would have been rude."

I'm going to murder them in their sleep, Ashe vowed to himself as the twins dutifully marched two plates over, each bearing a single cupcake. One had white frosting topping an orange-colored cake, the other was green frosting on a chocolate cake. Judging by the twins' faces, one eaten cupcake had had chocolate frosting (Cole) and the other had been pink (Cinda).

"The chocolate one was really good," Cole said, turning away from his older brother's murderous glare. "The cream inside was really sweet. I was surprised it was different from the icing."

"Mine had raspberry filling inside." Cinda looked smug, as if the filling had been a personal accomplishment. "Was there lemon in the cake?"

"Yes." Dedue looked mildly embarrassed. "It was a take on strawberry lemonade, with a raspberry center."

And _there_ was the reason for Cinda's superior look. She'd claimed the cupcake Ashe would have chosen. Not that he wasn't certain that all the cupcakes would have been outstanding, but he would have preferred the strawberry lemonade one had he been given the choice.

"It was a custard inside the chocolate-chocolate one, right?" Cole asked, folding his legs beneath him as he sat on the couch between Dedue and Ashe. Ashe couldn't tell if he was intentionally coming between them, or if he was just being obnoxious to his sister by taking the last seat available on the couch. When the three siblings sat on the couch, there was room to sprawl and stretch, but with Dedue taking up one side of it, Ashe found himself elbow-to-elbow with his brother. Cinda made a face and perched on the couch's arm after grabbing a video game controller.

"Yes, a Bavarian custard," Dedue admitted. He looked over the top of Cole's head to Ashe. "Does exceptional taste run in your family?"

Ashe laughed. "We just all grew up helping in the restaurant, so we learned a lot. Cole and Cinda prefer to eat, not cook."

"As if you let us cook," Cole muttered. He had just seemed to realize his error in sitting down without grabbing a controller. He eyed his sister, who was deliberately keeping a very straight face and not meeting his eyes.

"The last time I let you two cook, you covered the entire kitchen in flour and the two of your looked like ghosts," Ashe replied sharply. "If we had a yard, I would have kicked you outside and hosed you both off."

"That was two years ago!" The twins protested in unison. Cole made a sudden dart towards the TV to grab a controller. Cinda hurled herself off the couch arm, landing sprawled across both Ashe's and Dedue's laps, blocking the middle seat on the couch. Dedue jumped in surprise, but Ashe only sighed as he defended himself from a wild kick.

"That was my spot!" Cole shouted.

"You got up!" Cinda shouted back.

"Enough!" Ashe chimed in before it could escalate to violence. "Both of you sit on the floor, or we're not going to play at all."

"But Ashe!" the twins whined.

"No. That's not going to work." Ashe dumped Cinda off the couch and onto the floor. "You've both been an embarrassment all night. Either sit on the floor, or go do your homework."

The twins sent wide-eyed expressions of hurt and innocence up at their older brother, but Ashe wasn't moved. With heavy, put-upon sighs, they arranged themselves on the floor, sulking visibly as they locked in their usual characters from the selection screen.

"Sorry," Ashe mouthed silently to Dedue as the battle timer counted down.

Dedue only smiled, seeming genuinely happy. Ashe blushed--for some reason that smile just did things to him--but then the game was screaming "Battle!" and the twins launched simultaneous attacks. Knowing them as well as he did, Ashe was able to dodge the initial onslaught, but Dedue was unfortunately annihilated. Ashe beat Cole to his usual hiding place on the map, but before he could finish off the physically weaker character, Cinda caught up to him and together the twins finished him off.

"Okay, that was one game," Ashe counted, not the least bit disappointed it had been so short-lived; the sooner they finished these games, the sooner he could send the twins to their room. "Only two more."

"No!" Cinda protested. "That didn't count, it was too quick!"

"Yeah, it was like a warm-up," Cole piled on.

"Two more games," Ashe said firmly. "Starting now." He'd already selected a map randomizer and the countdown had started. The twins' protests were cut off as they turned their attention to the screen. This time, Dedue managed to fend off Cinda's attack long enough for Ashe to dig Cole out of hiding and beat him, but by then Ashe's character had lost enough health that Cinda ducked out of her fight with Dedue long enough to deliver the killing blow to her brother, then turned around and finished Dedue in a single hit. She looked rather smug afterwards until Ashe reminded her there was only one last game.

"But Ashe--"

"Do you still have homework?"

Cinda and Cole exchanged one of their telepathic glances and Ashe nudged each of them with his foot before they could come up with a lie.

"One more, then we're done for the night."

"He just wants to be alone with his boyfriend," Cinda whispered loudly to Cole.

"I'd like to eat my cupcake," Ashe said, though he blushed furiously and avoided Dedue's gaze. "Last game, let's go."

Cinda and Cole determinedly didn't look at each other, which should have let Ashe know that they were up to something but he'd been too grateful for the lack of argument to notice. As soon as the countdown finished, Cole and Cinda leapt off for different corners of the map. Ashe took advantage of their separation to team up with Dedue in going after Cinda. In response, Cinda held her ground and defended until Cole got in position to rescue her, then they both fled once again, forcing Dedue and Ashe to chase them down. The twins managed to stretch the final battle out to a fifteen-minute-match (perhaps some sort of record for the game) and it was the closest match yet, but ultimately the twins still won.

"You almost had us that time," Cole said, tone carefully polite. "I bet if we played one game, you actually might beat us."

"No, they--" Cinda stopped as her twin elbowed her sharply. As if the plan had caught through contact, Cinda nodded in agreement. "Riiiiight! I think you really could beat us if we played one more game."

Ashe rolled his eyes. "You two aren't nearly as clever as you think you are. That game lasted as long as three; time for you to go and do your homework."

"But, Ashe--"

"Do you know," Ashe said, turning to face Dedue. "I sometimes think my name is 'But, Ashe' with how often they say it."

Dedue chuckled. "We could have your nametag changed at work."

Ashe laughed. "No thank you. Go on, you two. Homework."

Cole and Cinda shot dual glares at Ashe as they tossed their controllers onto the coffee table, not bothering to clean up after themselves. Just as Cole appeared about to ask about the cupcakes still sitting on the table, Cinda dragged her finger through the green frosting of the chocolate cupcake. Ashe leapt to his feet, shouting a protest, sending the twins running for the door of their bedroom. It was actually comical for a moment as they tried running through at the same moment, each bouncing off the others' shoulder. They squawbled for a moment, then ducked through, slamming the door shut behind them. Ashe sighed, sagging back into the couch.

"I'm so sorry for them," Ashe said to Dedue. "I swear, they're usually better behaved than this. We don't usually have company over, so they don't know how to act."

"That doesn't bother me," Dedue assured him. "You can have both cupcakes. I still have plenty at home."

"I couldn't possibly eat both," Ashe said, smiling over at Dedue. "If you do have extra, I'd love to try that strawberry lemonade one Cinda stole earlier."

"Of course." Dedue smiled kindly. "I made a mix because I wasn't sure what everyone would want. I was going to bring the extra to work tomorrow."

"You're going to be the most popular person at the club tomorrow," Ashe laughed. He selected the cupcake that Cinda had dragged her finger through, sparing Dedue his sister's cooties. "Is this mint frosting on a chocolate cake?"

"With chocolate chips, yes." Dedue nodded. "The other is carrot cake with cream cheese frosting."

Oh, that also sounded good. Actually, they all sounded good. Ashe hoped Dedue had quite a few extra because he wanted to try them all.

As if sensing Ashe's dilemma, Dedue offered to cut the cupcakes in half and share. Ashe readily agreed, hurrying to the kitchen for a knife and some napkins. He took the half of the mint-chocolate-chip cupcake that Cinda had mangled with her finger, leaving Dedue the more pristine half of the cupcake. He wasn't surprised to find that the cake was soft and moist, while the frosting was sweet and rich. Ashe caught Dedue watching him as he licked his fingers clean and blushed.

"It's really good," Ashe said, cleaning off the remainder of the frosting with a napkin. "You're really talented, Dedue. It's a shame Dimitri didn't install a kitchen at the Blue Lion."

"Even if he had, it is likely I would only be preparing bar food. Wings and nachos and sliders." Dedue shrugged. He cut the carrot cake cupcake and set half of it on Ashe's plate. "That isn't to say I wouldn't have enjoyed the work, but bar food is rather simplistic."

"It doesn't have to be," Ashe pointed out. "The Blue Lion is pretty upscale already. If I were designing the bar menu, I'd elevate the normal bar dishes into something a little more elegant to fit the clientele. Instead of nachos, maybe a cheese, cracker and fruit plate with organic honey, and instead of chicken wings, maybe lightly breaded duck wings?" Ashe took a bite of the second cupcake, humming appreciatively. "Although, you probably wouldn't serve cupcakes at a bar, which is a shame because these are delicious!"

Dedue didn't respond right away. Instead he glanced down at the coffee table, at his two uneaten cupcake halves, then back at the closed door of the bedroom. For a moment, Ashe wondered if he had said something wrong, but then Dedue was leaning across the couch towards him, an intense look in his eyes.

"You have some frosting," he said, voice low. Ashe felt his breath catch, his blood sing. Dedue's hand cupped his own to keep him from dropping his cupcake. "Let me get it for you."

Ashe shivered as Dedue's tongue traced the curve of his upper lip, then sighed as warm lips claimed his. His mouth came open under the slightest bit of pressure from Dedue's kiss, letting Ashe taste the paella still on Dedue's tongue: an enchanting mix of sweet and savory.

After only a moment, Ashe set his hand on Dedue's chest, pushing lightly. Dedue sat back immediately, glancing back at the door that hid the twins from sight. "I understand if you don't want to--"

But Ashe had set his half-eaten cupcake back on its plate, brushed his hair out of his eyes, then swung himself up into Dedue's lap, arms wrapped around massive shoulders. He felt Dedue's hands curl around his waist as he leaned in, initiating the kiss himself this time. They hadn't had many opportunities for kissing, even though Ashe thought they both wished it were otherwise. They tried to be professional at work--most of the time. It was difficult when they both found themselves in the taproom, or in the back alley behind the club. But with Dedue living with Dimitri and Ashe's siblings at home, they had few chances outside of work to steal proper kisses. Ashe's couch had suddenly become an oasis and he was going to drink until he drowned.

Ashe did his best to remain silent--his brother and sister were only on the other side of a flimsy door, after all--but when Dedue's hips rose beneath him, his hands pulling Ashe tight against his body and grinding down, Ashe couldn't help but moan just a little. They both froze, Ashe cringing as Dedue turned to look at the door. For a held-breath moment, they each waited, but the door remained closed.

"Thank God," Ashe breathed, laying his head on Dedue's shoulder. He'd tugged Dedue's hair loose from it's tail and now he ran his fingers through it as he caught his breath. "I'm going to hear about it from them either way, but I'd rather not get interrupted right now."

He felt Dedue shift beneath him, one massive hand running the length of his back, starting at the back of his neck and stopping just shy of the top of his pants. Ashe shivered. More than anything, he wished for a truly private moment alone with Dedue, no siblings in the next room, no coworkers outside the taproom, no wealthy roommate straining to make polite conversation. He wanted a space just for him. Just for Dedue.

Just as Ashe began kissing Dedue's neck, reveling in the feel of hands running down his sides, breath ruffling his hair, fingers teasing the creases of his jeans, a shrill voice trilled loud enough to be heard through the door. A second rapidly followed and Ashe sagged against Dedue's chest.

"Sorry," he murmured, taking a moment to memorize Dedue's scent. "My brother and sister are the worst."

Dedue's laughter rocked Ashe's whole body. "You've been preparing me for this meeting for weeks. I knew what to expect." Ashe felt gentle fingers curl around his wrist and raise it to Dedue's mouth, a soft kiss against his pulse. "I am grateful for having had this much time alone with you."

"Me too," Ashe said, leaning back to meet Dedue's eyes. They were warm and comforting and he wanted nothing more than to sink deep inside them, swim around and live there, but--

A crash sounded against the shut door.

Ashe huffed irritably. "Do you know anyone who wants a pair of teenagers? I'd give them away for free right now."

Dedue laughed, helping Ashe to his feet. "It's obvious that they love you very much."

"Is it?" Ashe asked, smoothing his clothes so his siblings wouldn't tease him (although they probably would anyway). "If they do, they have a strange way of showing it."

The scuffle from the bedroom was escalating and once Ashe felt more himself and less a romantic puddle of goo, he yanked the door open and waded into the mess, interrupting the amateur boxing match between the twins. He sent Cole out to the dining room with his homework and set Cinda at the room's only desk, leaving the door open so he could keep an eye on her. They always worked better when they were separated, but Ashe had taken the chance on a moment of privacy rather than stern parenting.

By the time he got them settled, Dedue had finished his cupcake-halves, leaving only the few bites of Ashe's forgotten carrot cake cupcake.

"Thank you so much for going to the effort of making these," Ashe said, politely distant now that the twins could see them. He finished off the last bite and wiped his fingers clean of the frosting. "I'll look forward to tasting the rest at work tomorrow."

"I look forward to sharing," Dedue said, rising from the couch. Ashe didn't miss how his siblings watched the giant rise from the corners of their eyes. He understood the sentiment; it was easy to forget how big Dedue actually was when he was sitting down. "Would you like to meet for dinner before work tomorrow?"

"If you don't mind." Ashe smiled. "Let's text tomorrow. It's late and I really should be helping with homework."

"Alright," Dedue said agreeably. He turned, making eye contact with Cole, then Cinda through the bedroom doorway. "It was a pleasure meeting the both of you."

"You too," Cole said. "Come by again sometime. It was fun playing Battle Brothers with four people."

"And bring more cupcakes!" Cinda chimed in.

"I think you mean 'Thank you for the cupcakes,'" Ashe coached her.

"That too," Cinda agreed, already turning back to her homework. Ashe sighed; there really was no cure for teenagers except growth. Too bad that took so long.

"I'll walk you out," Ashe offered as Dedue walked to the door. He ignored a questioning glance from Cole as he pulled the door shut behind him.

Dedue certainly didn't need to be shown the way out of Ashe's apartment building, but if they could squeeze out another five minutes alone, Ashe would take it. As they walked to the single elevator at the end of the hall, Ashe quested out meekly for Dedue's hand. His face felt warm when Dedue's fingers threaded through his own. They didn't talk, but the walk felt comfortable and easy. At the ground floor, Ashe walked alongside Dedue to the lobby and the rows of mailboxes, pausing before the glass doors reflecting light back at them, for it was pitch dark outside.

"I had a good night," Dedue assured Ashe, as if he thought Ashe was worried.

"That's good," Ashe replied. "Because I don't think I'll risk another one until the twins have both moved out."

Dedue chuckled. "Next time, you'll have to come over to my place. I'd like to cook shrimp biryani for you and your brother and sister."

“The twins would like that.” Ashe blushed. "I'd like it, too."

Dedue stooped, pressing a light kiss to Ashe's cheek. "And then sometime I’d like to cook for you without the twins or Dimitri around."

Ashe was pretty sure his face was indistinguishable from a tomato after Dedue's whisper. "I--I'd really like that."

He couldn't quite meet Dedue's eyes, as embarrassed and aroused as he was, but Ashe did squeeze Dedue's fingers before they slipped free on his own. He caught his breath as Dedue stepped outside, an evening breeze cooling the heat in Ashe's cheeks. Then he shivered, wrapping his arms around himself in a hug, a single thought singing in his mind:

_I am so in love!_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just in case anyone was wondering about the twins' names, I thought that since Ashe means, well, ash, that I'd name Cole for coal and Cinda for cinders. Sorry, bad puns are bad. If his brother and sister ever do get names in canon, I'll be embarrassed for myself.
> 
> I do have one more chapter planned (and it's a spicy one!) so if you'd like to know when that get posted, please follow me on [Twitter](https://twitter.com/ShiroKabocha1).


	3. Dinner for Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After meeting Ashe's family over dinner, Dedue invites Ashe and his family over for dinner at his and Dimitri's apartment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please note: The rating on this fic has been upgraded from M to E for some spicy situations. ^_^

Ashe gulped as he stared up at the steel and glass building that housed the million-dollar condos of the city's elite upper crust. It was a building he'd seen hundreds of times before today, but not one he'd ever thought to have cause to set foot inside. Unless, of course, he'd been desperate enough to take a food delivery job, but in order to even qualify for one of those jobs, he'd need to upgrade to a smart phone and that wasn't really something he could afford. Although, he supposed he must look like he was delivering food, what with the bakery box under his arm.

He was stalling. Mentally, he kicked himself.

The building isn't scary, Ashe thought, forcing himself to take a step. Then he stopped again. The doorman was a little scary. Mostly because he hadn't really been expecting the building to have a doorman.

Who had doormen anymore?

Ashe swallowed as the uniformed doorman swung the door open wide, giving Ashe a quizzical look. "Are you here to see someone?" The tone was polite, if just slightly judgmental. Ashe knew what he looked like, standing in front of such an opulent building: His jeans were faded and worn, his t-shirt a touch too small, his shoes beaten and dirty, and his hair needed a trim badly. He wished he could sink through the ground and just disappear.

I must steel myself, Ashe told himself firmly. Dedue doesn't care about any of that. I deserve to be here.

"I'm visiting Dedue and Dimitri," Ashe said, trying to sound confident. "Um, room--"

"The Blaiddyd residence, of course," the doorman put in. He smiled kindly and inclined his head. "You must be Ashe. I have your name on the guest list. Please, come in."

He scraped his shoes on the mat outside the door, conscious of tracking in dust and destitution. Whereas the lobby of Ashe's own apartment building opened into the mail room, this building opened into an expansive lobby, decorated with plush chairs and shining glass tables, as if the building's tenants frequently took meetings down here. It was empty now, for which Ashe was unabashedly relieved. One judgmental stare was more than enough for one day.

"The elevators are just down the corridor and to your left," the doorman instructed, gesturing with an open hand. "You'll want the twelfth floor."

"Thank you," Ashe said. Cheeks flushing, he wondered if he was supposed to tip the doorman and felt alarmed when he remembered he hadn't brought any cash with him. Thankfully, it didn't seem as if the doorman had been expecting anything, so Ashe slunk away after a smile and a nod. He noticed a faint tremble in his hands as he jabbed at the elevator button. He left a fingerprint button and anxiously swiped at it with the hem of his shirt, juggling the objects in his arms. Another point to be grateful for: He'd left his brother and sister at home. He was certain that if they'd come with him, they'd be touching everything in sight, leaving greasy hand prints in their wake. Honestly, sometimes it was like they were still seven, rather than seventeen.

The elevator doors glided open silently. Soft music played as Ashe stepped inside, impressed by the soft rug. He pressed the button for the twelfth floor and gasped at the speed at which the doors shut and the car soared upwards, leaving his stomach behind. The walls were all polished to a mirror shine and Ashe attempted to sweep his hair off his forehead. He suddenly regretted not dressing up, but then, it was only a dinner, wasn't it? Surely that didn't require creased pants and a collared shirt, right? It wasn't as if they were going out anywhere.

The elevator doors slid open with the barest of whispers and Ashe stepped out into a window-lit corridor of dark blue carpets and gold trim on everything. The wall was a creamy beige, marred only by a sign that listed two names, each one with a directional arrow underneath it. The arrow under the name Blaiddyd pointed to the right. The second name, he wasn't too surprised to note, was Fraldarius, which meant Dimitri and Dedue shared this floor with Felix. Ingrid and Sylvain probably lived here, too, but Ashe had no notion as to which floors might be theirs.

Only two rooms per floor? Ashe wondered, following the arrow. But this building is massive! So then...

He gulped, preparing himself to find an apartment at least four times bigger than the one he shared with his brother and sister. He took a moment to compose himself outside the door emblazoned with Dimitri's last name, then timidly rapped his knuckles on the highly polished wood.

Ashe felt nervous wondering who would open the door: Dimitri or Dedue. If it was Dimitri, what would he say? The club owner knew about relationship with Dedue and seemed very accepting of it, but as the two of them came from very different backgrounds, they had little to speak about that wasn't work-related. Perhaps Ashe should have brought a gift for Dimitri--this was his home, after all--but it was too late to worry about such a thing now.

To Ashe's immense relief, he heard Dedue's unmistakable heavy footsteps through the door before it came open, revealing Dedue with his hair neatly scraped back into a ponytail, a pale green apron on over his usual black t-shirt and jeans.

"Hi," Ashe said, blushing for no definable reason.

"Hello." Dedue peered past him, looking pleased but slightly confused. "Are Cole and Cinda with you?"

"No, I had to leave them at home at the last minute." Ashe made a face. "I'm sorry, I should have texted you but I was in a rush."

"No worries." Dedue stepped out of the doorway and bid Ashe to enter. The entryway floor was rich, polished wood with a shoe-cubby against one wall. Ashe obligingly toed off his shoes, grateful that he'd at least thought to wear new socks. "Dimitri isn't here, either. He received a call to go and visit one of his hospitals outside the city last night. He won't be back until the weekend."

"Ah," Ashe said, glancing around surreptitiously. He hadn't really known what to expect of Dimitri's apartment--condo, sorry--but if he'd been forced to make a guess, he would have thought antique furniture and modern appliances. Instead, the front room looked comfortably lived in, with a plush warp-around couch, a huge, mounted television and scattered tables and chairs. It was all obviously expensive, but at least it looked used, perhaps even a little worn at the edges. The walls, though, were floor-to-ceiling windows, allowing in natural light and looking out over the city in a way that brought to mind a king surveying his land.

"Can I take that from you?" Dedue asked, gesturing to the pastry box in Ashe's hands.

"Um, yes." Another blush, this one only half-embarrassed, the other half frustrated. "It's only a fruit tart, I'm afraid. I picked it up on the way here."

"That's fine," Dedue assured him. "Does it need to be refrigerated?"

"Yes, please." Ashe followed after Dedue, passing through a dining room that perhaps would have looked intimidating had the long table not been covered in papers, books, boxes and a faintly glowing laptop. It gave Ashe the impression that the table was more often used for business rather than actual dining. "I was going to bring creme brulee, but, um, I'm afraid time got away from me."

No, actually, it hadn't been time that had gotten away from him: The blow torch had gotten away from him. Specifically, the twins had taken on the task of torching the custard when Ashe had ducked out of the kitchen. He hadn't even been gone a whole five minutes, yet the twins had somehow managed to ruin an entire tray of creme brulee. They'd apologized, but Ashe had been mad enough to ground them by leaving them home instead of taking them to dinner at Dedue's. 

Thinking about it now, Ashe felt a little guilty about leaving them at home. They'd only been trying to help. And at least they hadn't set the kitchen on fire. Then Ashe recalled specifically forbidding them from touching the blowtorch and they'd gone ahead and done it anyway, just because they wanted to burn something and he couldn't feel too bad about his decision to leave them home. And, of course, he’d taken the power supply of the tiny blowtorch with him; he wasn’t foolish enough to leave such a weapon in the hands of unsupervised teenagers again.

"I'm almost finished cooking the shrimp biryani," Dedue explained as they entered the kitchen. "I can send some home with you for the twins, if you'd like. I made a bit extra."

Ashe drew up short in the doorway, the austere beauty of the kitchen overwhelming his sensibilities. He'd worked in kitchens before, so he was used to seeing double ovens, glass stovetops, enormous refrigerators and racks of sharpened knives, but never had he seen all of that and more in a home kitchen. And every surface was shiny clean, all black and white and silver, positively the envy of every home-kitchen anywhere.

Dedue stopped when he realized Ashe wasn't following him. He glanced around, seeming chagrined at the kitchen around him. "I felt the same way when I saw it first," he admitted, faint color in his cheeks. "It is a bit much, especially because Dimitri doesn't really cook for himself. I guess I've just gotten used to it."

Ashe nodded slowly, still feeling overwhelmed. "I knew he was rich, but I...I guess I wasn't expecting this."

Dedue looked embarrassed. "I was very fortunate that he took me in. He doesn't charge me nearly what he should for my room here, so I help with cooking and cleaning. Also, the window garden." He pointed to what appeared to be a closet of glass, filled with potted plants, most of which Ashe recognized as herbs. He wouldn't have called it a window garden so much as he would have called it a greenhouse.

Which reminded him of the other item he'd brought.

"I, um, brought a plant?" Sheepishly, he held out the potted plant. "I knew you had an herb garden, so I didn't know what you might need. My favorite flowers are violets, so...I brought you one?"

It had seemed like a nice thought at the time, but now he just felt foolish. Did Dedue even like flowers? It wasn't even useful in the way an herb would have been. He'd been thinking it was romantic, but now he regretted his decision.

Dedue's smile was like the sun peeking through clouds. "Thank you, Ashe. You didn't have to bring anything, you know."

"Well, you brought mint so I...I thought I should bring something."

Dedue took the small pot from Ashe's hands. "Do you mind if I put it in my room? I'll be back in a moment, if you don't mind giving the pot a stir?"

"Not at all!" What a relief! Being able to do something food-related. Ashe picked up the wooden spoon and gave the shrimp and rice dish a stir as Dedue carried the potted plant away. With Dedue out of sight, he even gave the dish a small taste, surprised by how many spices had been added. He'd have thought the dish would be spicy-hot, and while it did carry some heat, it was more flavorful than fiery. Ashe smiled; he'd known Dedue was a good cook for a while now, but it was nice to finally enjoy a hot, home-cooked meal with him.

Dedue returned in short order, still smiling faintly. He set to work preparing a yogurt to go with the shrimp biryani, apologizing to Ashe for making him help with dinner. Ashe waved him off, a sincere smile on his face. There were few things he enjoyed as much as cooking. In fact, Ashe's perfect date would be creating a meal from scratch together and then eating it picnic-style on the floor of the living room. Maybe something like handmade pasta, hands covered in flour as they stretched and shaped the dough, or perhaps chocolate-covered strawberries that they would feed each other in between kisses.

Ashe felt a burn on his face that had nothing to do with the spices in the shrimp.

"That's probably done cooking on the stove," Dedue said, peering over Ashe's shoulder to look into the pan. The hand he placed on Ashe's back sent chills up Ashe's spine; he wanted nothing more than to lean back into Dedue's body heat, feel the strength on those slab-like muscles. "It'll finish in the oven. I have it preheated already."

"Okay," Ashe said, finding it difficult to draw breath with Dedue standing so close. As Dedue wrapped a glass bowl in plastic wrap and set it inside the fridge, Ashe gave the skillet a final toss, then placed it inside the oven. After consulting Dedue, he set a timer for ten minutes.

A heavy silence settled over the kitchen. Ashe felt they were probably thinking the exact same thing: Now what?

"I borrowed the latest version of Battle Brothers from Sylvain," Dedue said unexpectedly, removing his apron and folding it fastidiously. "I had thought your brother and sister might enjoy playing it while we cooked."

"That was really thoughtful." Ashe's whole chest felt warm by the thought of Dedue being so considerate towards his siblings. "But I'm sure it would have caused a fight between them, so it's probably better they didn't come. And if they play the latest version, I know I'll have to hear them whine for months about wanting the new system and the new game."

Dedue ducked his head, chagrined. "I hadn't thought about that."

"No, no!" Ashe said quickly. "It was a really nice gesture. Really! But my brother and sister just...they're good kids, but they tend to get a little...over-excited sometimes."

Dedue glanced around the condo as if seeing it for the first time. "I've gotten so used to living here, I don't see it as what it looks like anymore. I didn't mean for you or your family to feel intimidated at all."

Ashe hesitated, glancing around again at all the expensive kitchen appliances, the newest electronics in the living room, the store-bought furniture. "It is a little intimidating. But I think this would have been a bit much for us even if we hadn't lost our home and our restaurant. People like Dimitri and his friends...they're on a whole different level, aren't they?"

"Yeah." Dedue rubbed a hand over the back of his neck. "I....Sometimes I think about moving out. But then I worry about how Dimitri would get along without me."

Ashe frowned, confused. "What do you mean? He manages a nightclub on top of his hospital management empire. Surely he can take care of himself?"

Dedue chuckled ruefully. "There are many things Dimitri does well, but he often forgets to eat unless someone reminds him. And I'm fairly certain he can't make a sandwich, never mind cook for himself."

Ashe surprised both of them with a laugh. He put a hand over his mouth to try and stop it, but it bubbled over anyway. The mystified look on Dedue's face only made him laugh harder until he had to lean against the kitchen counter for support. By the time he could breathe gain, he was wiping tears away from his eyes.

"It's just--" Another laugh interrupted him. Ashe took a moment to compose himself; Dedue was staring openly at him now. "You talk about Dimitri the same way I talk about my brother and sister! Like you're his parent or something."

Dedue chuckled at that. "I suppose that is fair. I do clean up quite a few of his messes. Although, I'm sure he'd say Ingrid is more his parent than I am. She's the one who keeps him on track in managing all his businesses."

"I can't imagine it's easy, doing what he does," Ashe allowed. "My mother tried teaching me the business side of running a restaurant, but all I wanted to do was cook. I don't really have much of a head for numbers." He blushed then, ducking his head. "Even worse than most, I'm afraid, since I never finished my education."

Dedue looked uncomfortable, shifting his weight from foot to foot. "I wish someone had been there to help you, the same way Dimitri was there for me."

Ashe smiled, but it felt weak and watery. "I was there for Cole and Cinda. That's enough for me."

"Yes, but--" The timer on the stove made Ashe jump at the same time it cut off Dedue's reply. Grabbing a potholder, Dedue stooped and pulled the skillet from the oven. The scents of spices and shrimp filled the kitchen, making Ashe's mouth water. The lid of the skillet was beaded with condensation and steam billowed from the pan when Dedue removed it. He scraped up a bit of the rice, blew on it gently, then tasted the results. "I think it's done. It should cool before--"

But Ashe had already grabbed a spoon of his own. The delicious odors filling the kitchen had his stomach grumbling in hunger and he didn't want to wait for the dish to finish cooling. He scooped up a small mouthful, blew the steam from it as Dedue had, then popped it into his mouth. It was hot--as he expected--and also very spicy. The flavor of the shrimp had seeped into the rice and vegetables, giving the dish both flavor and texture. He'd never tasted anything quite like it, but it was delicious!

"Mmm! Dedue!" Ashe beamed. "This is wonderful! You should--"

But then Dedue's mouth was on his, one hand tipping Ashe's chin up, the other pushing him back against the counter. Ashe gasped in surprise and suddenly Dedue's tongue was in his mouth, chasing the flavor of the biryani. Ashe gripped fistfuls of Dedue's shirt, closing his eyes and kissing back just as eagerly. He felt thick fingers tuck his hair behind his ear, a thumb rub along the top of his jeans. Ashe had just about always associated food and cooking with family and love; he was just now learning to associate it with romance and sex, too.

The kiss broke, giving Ashe moment to suck in a lungful of air right before Dedue grabbed him around the waist and swung him up onto the kitchen counter. He stepped between Ashe's legs, cupped one hand behind Ashe's head and kissed him again, tongue thrusting, teeth teasing. Ashe hooked a leg behind Dedue's hip, drawing him as close as possible, clinging to Dedue's massive shoulders as he kissed until he was breathless. When it finally ended, Dedue stood with his forehead pressed to Ashe's, the two of them panting into each other's mouths.

"What was that for?" Ashe asked, smiling as he caught his breath. He was close enough to see the blush on Dedue's cheeks.

"When you look like that--" Dedue stopped himself, shaking his head, which in turn shook Ashe's. "Seeing you enjoy my food it just...I can't help myself. I love it. I hope that wasn't too forceful, Ashe."

"Not at all." He meant it, too. There was nothing anyone could do or say that would make Ashe fearful of Dedue. Dedue was large and he was certainly strong, but he was careful to a fault. Ashe had known that even before Dedue started mixing delicate, fussy shots at the bar with him. And, as it turned out, Ashe didn't mind a bit of rough handling every now and then.

"It's always hard holding back at work," Dedue admitted, green eyes locked with green eyes. "You always look so focused. You put on a smile for the guests, but when you really smile...Ashe, I love it."

"I love you." The words were out of Ashe's mouth before he could stop them. The second they were out in the open, he bit his lip, wishing he could take them back. It was true: He'd known he was falling for Dedue long before this. But wasn't this too soon?

And more to the point: Was Ashe allowed to be in love? His first priority was and would always be to his brother and sister. How could he be so selfish as to fall in love?

Dedue froze, a breath drawing them scant inches apart. Ashe lifted his hand to his mouth, terrified that he'd just ruined whatever it was between them. Should he ignore it? Should he try to laugh it off? Should he make an excuse and leave? Hope that, somehow, he hadn't just ruined his working relationship irreparably?

"Ashe." Dedue's voice was a whisper. "I know you carry the weight of the world on your shoulders. I know you spread yourself too thin. So whatever you want those words to mean between us, I'll let you define them. But I...I've wanted to say the same thing. For a while now. I love you too, Ashe."

It wasn't as if Ashe's heart broke, like a glass dropped to the floor. It was like it swelled and burst: a souffle left in the oven too long to rise and then fall. Every bottled emotion since his parents' death bubbled to the surface, reducing Ashe to a quaking, shivering mess, only able to cling to Dedue for balance and support. He felt arms wrap around him, one holding him tightly around the waist, the other curving around his neck. He laid his head on Dedue's shoulder, breathing in Dedue's solid scent along with the scents of chopped vegetables and fresh spices as he sniffled. It wasn't fair. It wasn't fair to make Dedue take on Ashe's burdens along with his own. Ashe could take care of himself and his family. He'd proven that, hadn't he?

But...wouldn't it be so nice to have someone help him when he needed it?

Ashe recovered slowly, sitting back on the counter and pulling away from Dedue. Using the heels of his hands, he brushed the tears off his cheeks, attempting a weak smile. Dedue's hands slid down his back, but didn't let go entirely: Instead they curled almost lazily around his hips. Huddled between Dedue's arms, held in Dedue's eyes, Ashe felt like the center of the whole world. It was a heady and terrifying experience.

"I'm sorry," Ashe said, breaking eye contact because that was easier. "I think I ruined our dinner."

"Our dinner can wait," Dedue assured him, voice gentle. "Ashe." A hand lifted. Soothed hair over Ashe's ear. He leaned into the touch, rough and calloused fingers grounding him. "The last thing I want to do is pressure you. But do you think you might consider...spending the night?"

Ashe sudden and shaky inhale created a vacuum between them. "I can't, the twins--"

"Are seventeen years old," Dedue reminded him. "That's one year older than you were when you became their parent. But if you insist on leaving after dinner, I certainly won't stop you. I only want you to know you have the option to take something for yourself. If you want it."

It would have been so much easier if Dedue had said something like "Don't they go to bed without you most nights when you're at work?" because then Ashe could have gotten indignant and angry. Could have pushed away, maybe even stormed out. Then the next time they worked together, he could have offered a shy apology for his behavior and a homemade dessert and they could have moved past it. Instead, Dedue was giving him a choice--a choice that should have been easy to make. So easy, it shouldn't have even been a choice. The twins came first. Always.

But really...

I want to choose Dedue, Ashe thought. I want...I want to choose _me_.

"I don't know," Ashe said finally. "I want to, I do, but...I don't know if I can."

"That's alright," Dedue assured him. He glanced over at the stovetop, where the skillet was still steaming, but faintly. "I believe dinner is ready. If you still want it."

"I do," Ashe said, trying a smile. "Please. I've been waiting to try your shrimp biryani ever since I cooked paella for you."

Dedue nodded and started to step away. Almost frantically, Ashe reached out and grabbed Dedue's shirt, pulling him back towards the counter. Dedue looked surprised, but allowed himself to be tugged forward. Ashe looped his arm around Dedue's neck and kissed him again, long and hard, reluctant to let Dedue's warmth, his protection, leave.

"I didn't mean to say it," Ashe admitted quietly. "But I did mean it."

"I know." Dedue swiped his thumb over Ashe's cheekbone. "I did, too."

Dedue helped Ashe down from the countertop, then handed him a set of bowls and silverware, directing him to the table in the breakfast nook, rather than the paperwork-laden dining room table. Once the table was set, Dedue served them each a scoop of rice topped with four shrimp, then a dollop of the yogurt he'd made earlier, explaining that the yogurt cooled the spices in the biryani. Ashe sat and waited to start while Dedue retreated to the kitchen for drinks. A long pause had Ashe glancing over the table to see what the problem was.

Dedue was frowning into the fridge, some internal debate going on in his mind as he gazed into its depths.

"What is it?" Ashe asked, confused.

Dedue's mouth twisted. "Dimitri always takes a glass of wine with dinner, so I chilled a bottle without thinking. I'm afraid I didn't think of having anything else to drink besides ice water."

"I don't mind ice water," Ashe replied sincerely. Then, boldly, he added: "But a white wine would pair well with the shrimp and perhaps tone down some of the spices. Is it a chardonnay?"

"Reisling," Dedue replied.

"Even better." Ashe wasn't a wine-drinker (mostly because he couldn't afford it) but he'd read all about wine pairings in fine dining articles online. "That'll go really well with the yogurt you've made."

Dedue looked conflicted. "Are you sure? If you'd wait, I could go pick something up. Or see if Felix has anything like lemonade or soda."

"Reislings are sweet, aren't they?" Ashe beamed. "I'd love to try one. I might not drink very much, though, if that's okay."

Dedue still hesitated, but then he pulled down two wine glasses from a high shelf. He uncorked the bottle of wine with an ease that Ashe found enviable, then poured them each almost half a glass of wine before bringing the glasses over to the table.

"Thank you," Ashe said, swirling the glass as he'd seen done on TV then sniffed the bouquet. It was fruity and floral, which he expected, with just a hint of acidity. A small sip taught him that it was more bubbly than he'd expected and the sensation made his nose itch unpleasantly, but the taste was light and sweet. When he set the glass down, he found Dedue watching him curiously, making him chuckle. "I guess it's strange when a bartender doesn't really drink all that much."

"My apologies," Dedue said, easing into his seat. "I was waiting to see if you'd like the wine, or if I should get you a glass of water instead."

"Oh, it's great!" Ashe assured him. "I could really taste the pear, which made it really sweet. I don't really know all the right wine terminology, but it had a fruity taste at the beginning and an acidic finish. I liked it a lot."

Dedue looked mildly startled. "Your palate is remarkable, you know."

Ashe blushed and laughed, toying with a shrimp on his plate. "No, I just grew up tasting a lot of different dishes. There was this game my dad used to play where he'd have me taste something he'd cooked and I'd guess which ingredients he'd used."

"That sounds like fun," Dedue said when Ashe fell silent. It was strange, but Ashe hadn't spoken of his parents so much ever since they'd died. What was even more strange was the knowledge that he wasn't even sad talking about them; the memory was a very happy one. "Can you tell which spices I used in this dish?"

"Some." Ashe inhaled the aroma of the dish, then scooped up some rice, breathing deeply with the flavors still heavy on his tongue. "The cloves are the most prominent, but there's also cardamom. And...cinnamon?"

Dedue smiled as he speared a shrimp. "Yes. And cumin and fennel."

"Ah, I probably wouldn't have gotten the fennel." Ashe tested the taste again, this time searching for the elusive fennel. "It's very subtle, but it adds a lot on the back end of the taste. This really is excellent, Dedue. Cole and Cinda are going to be so jealous for missing this."

Dedue blushed. "I made plenty. I'll send it home with you."

"But if you spoil them, they'll just ask you to cook for them over and over again," Ashe pointed out.

"I wouldn't mind." Dark green eyes caught Ashe's from across the table. "Truly. I enjoyed meeting your brother and sister. I wouldn't mind cooking for them in the future."

And for you. Dedue didn't say it, but Ashe heard it. He pretended the heat on his face was from the spices and took a small bite of the yogurt to cool himself. "That's very kind, really, but, um..." Ashe trailed off, chasing a bit of rice around his plate. "I love my brother and sister, but I think I'd like to keep you all to myself as much as possible." He laughed, never raising his eyes from his plate. "I suppose that sounds strange, doesn't it?"

"Not at all." Ashe chanced a glance up to see that Dedue was smiling. "Are Cole and Cinda in their last year of high school? What do they plan to do afterwards?"

An invisible line of tension eased between them; it was easy to talk about Cole and Cinda and their plans for the future. Cole wanted to keep living at home and go to community college, so Ashe was already saving money to help with tuition. Cinda wanted to start working right away and save up enough money to move out. Ashe was trying to convince her that at least a small portion of what she made should go to the family to help pay rent and buy food. Cinda didn't really like the idea that some of her money would support Cole's education when he could be earning an income, too, so things were a little tense at home for now. Ashe found himself admitting that he was glad to be somewhere without them for once--he thought maybe the wine had loosened his tongue to say something so terrible out loud, even though he'd only had two sips so far.

Dedue offered only sympathy, no advice, which was actually better in Ashe's opinion. Dedue very kindly asked if Ashe knew about Dimitri's employee education fund and when Ashe admitted he didn't, Dedue explained that Dimitri valued empowering his staff and allowed them to apply for funds they could use towards their education. In fact, when Dedue had gone for his bartending course, he'd used the employee education fund to pay for it. Surprised, Ashe asked if anyone could apply for funds, or if they had to be an employee for a certain amount of time. Dedue confirmed that anyone could apply, no matter how long they'd worked for Dimitri. Ashe found himself considering getting his high school degree as he finished his dinner, later finding himself subtly impressed that Dedue had managed to work it into the conversation without bringing it up directly. How could one person be so kind, considerate and understanding? And how could such a person be in love with Ashe, of all people?

They finished eating and somehow Ashe finished his glass of wine. He insisted on helping Dedue clean up, but that didn't take long as the dishwasher in Dimitri's kitchen was more powerful than the one at the restaurant Ashe worked at. Still, he enjoyed working in the kitchen with Dedue. Even though it was a good deal larger than the space they shared at the bar, every time they moved past each other, they couldn't help but reach out and touch. When Ashe rinsed plates at the sink, Dedue stopped behind him, wrapping his arms around him in an affectionate squeeze. When Dedue reached up to put something on a high shelf, Ashe tickled his ribs, laughing when Dedue squirmed.

All too soon, the dinner and its clean up were over. Dedue packaged the leftovers in a foil-covered tin, as well as a plastic container for the yogurt so Ashe could bring it home to his siblings. They lingered in the kitchen, each reluctant to say good bye, each too fearful to repeat Dedue's earlier request to stay.

"Did you...want to finish the bottle of wine?" Dedue finally asked. "Dimitri isn't here to finish it and I don't drink on my own. If you'd like, we could find a movie on TV?"

"That sounds nice," Ashe admitted, grateful to have a reason to stay. Dedue poured them each a new glass of wine (only half full again) then led the way to the living room. Dimitri's television was larger than Ashe's bathtub and he found himself unaccountably intimidated by it. The sofa was deep enough to almost swallow him and even though Dedue sat down delicately, the dip in the cushion was enough to rock Ashe against his side. Not that Ashe was complaining, of course.

"What do you like to watch?" Dedue asked, opening the guide on the television.

"Hm..." Ashe didn't want to admit that he didn't have a TV service, though he suspected Dedue already knew. "I'm not in the mood for anything specific. What do you like to watch?"

Dedue turned to look down at Ashe pressed against his side. "Promise you won't laugh?"

"Laugh? No, of course not."

Dedue's cheeks colored as he spoke. "I like the cooking shows. Especially the competitive ones."

Ashe beamed. "That sounds fun! Are there any on right now?"

Dedue flipped through the channels and found a show where bakers competed against each other by making massive, creative cakes. Ashe had never seen it before, though Dedue declared it a rerun. He suggested they find a movie instead, but Ashe was riveted. The challenge was to make a cake representative of each baker's hometown and while one was making a cake that looked like a countryside--complete with piped-icing fields of wheat and candied picket fences--another was creating a skyscraper with layers upon layers of cake. He begged Dedue to let him finish the episode, but when it ended the next one was already queued up and as Ashe had started rooting for one of the bakers, Dedue simply left the channel on.

At some point (Ashe couldn't have said when) he finished his glass of wine and Dedue asked if he'd like another. Ashe had nodded miserably, saying he needed something to comfort him because his baker lost at the end of the next episode. Still, as Dedue set the glass back in Ashe's hand, he found himself compelled to watch the next episode.

"This is how they get you hooked," Dedue warned mockingly. "By airing the reruns of completed seasons so you want to watch the next season live."

"Well, they got me," Ashe admitted. "I didn't even know you could do all of that with fondant. But then, I never really got to do a lot of baking."

"Says the person who was making creme brulee earlier."

"That's hardly baking. Oh! I just remembered." Ashe set his glass down carefully on the coffee table. "Did you want some of the fruit tart I brought?"

"Certainly."

Ashe had seen enough of the kitchen to find plates and a knife to serve pieces of the fruit tart. He brought them back to the living room just as the next episode was starting. Dedue thanked him, though Ashe was embarrassed to have bought something when Dedue had handmade four different types of cupcakes when he'd come over for dinner at Ashe's apartment. Still, store bought fruit tart was better than coming empty-handed.

The bottle of wine ran out before the fruit tart did and the fruit tart ended before the cake show did. Ashe was glancing nervously at the time as the episode promising to be the finale was starting.

"I should go," Ashe said, glancing at his cell phone. 

"I could tell you who wins," Dedue offered, though Ashe read the silent plea in his eyes.

And really...even with the slight haze of wine clouding his thoughts, he didn't really want to leave. The couch was deep and lulling, the cooking show was fun and exciting and being pressed against Dedue's side was just so comforting. But still. The twins had to come first.

"Let me call home," Ashe said, shifting in his seat to stand.

"Let me pause the show." Dedue clicked the controller, freezing the image on screen. The casual use of the pause button on a broadcast told Ashe he'd missed more than a few things over the years since he'd last had a television service. "You can call from here unless you need privacy."

"Ah, no, it's just..." Ashe took a breath, steeling himself as he debated between calling Cinda's phone or Cole's. "I'm sure they're going to embarrass me again. Lousy little gremlins."

Dedue smiled. "They only tease you because they love you."

"I'm so sure." Ashe rolled his eyes. He clicked a name on the phone without looking so he couldn't be accused of favoring one twin over the other. It rang twice and then Cole's voice answered.

"Why are you calling Cinda's phone instead of mine?"

"Why are you answering Cinda's phone?" Ashe asked.

"Why are you on my phone?" came a shrieking voice in the background.

Ashe sighed and dropped his head into his hand, rubbing his forehead as the bickering continued.

"Calm down, it's only Ashe."

"He called to talk to me!"

"You were in the bathroom, so I answered."

"I didn't give you permission to answer my phone!"

"It's only Ashe!"

"Could you two just focus? For a minute?" Ashe asked, delving into his endless pool of patience. "Put the phone on speaker, Cole."

"Give it to me."

"He said to put it on speaker."

"I can do it, give me my phone."

Ashe mouthed an apology to Dedue, who, for some reason, looked entirely too amused. As the bickering went on, Ashe sighed.

"Look, I'm just calling to let you both know that--" I'm on my way home. That's what he was going to say.

"It's okay if you want to stay at your boyfriend's place," Cinda said baldly.

Ashe choked and turned red, hoping Dedue hadn't heard her through the phone.

"Yeah, we got a new video game on the way--Ow! I mean, we've got a lot of reading homework and we don't need any help," Cole added.

"That's not what I'm--"

"We're fine, Ashe, really," Cinda insisted. "You don't have to be here just because you have the night off work."

"We've got school tomorrow, so it's not like we're going to go anywhere or have anyone over," Cole assured him.

"Yeah, it'll be just like any other night that you're out, so don't worry."

"Except we'll be playing--Ow! Cinda! I mean, we'll be reading."

Ashe dropped his face into his palm. "Listen to me. I don't know how you bought a new video game--"

"Recycling money," the twins chorused.

"--But I'm on my way home and when I get there, you both better be able to tell me all about those reading assignments you'll be doing in the meantime."

"No! Ashe, really, we're fine!" Cinda sounded shrill, which was slightly alarming until Ashe heard the crinkle of a foil bag and the pop-hiss of a soda can: It seemed the twins had picked up more than just a new video game. "You should have fun every once in a while, so just...have fun."

"But be safe," Cole added, as if he were the sibling-parent rather than Ashe. "Condoms save lives."

"Oh God," Ashe murmured into his palm, mortified beyond all belief.

"Okay, have a good night, Ashe!" Cinda was calling through the phone.

"Don't come home!" Cole reminded him cheerily.

Ashe wasn't sure if he was relieved or angry when the phone clicked off. He kept his head down, hand over his face, refusing to look up at Dedue, feeling fairly certain he'd heard everything. He took deep, calming breaths, steadied the shaking in his hands, then slowly looked up.

Dedue kept his face almost entirely straight: One corner of his mouth quivered as if resisting curling into a smile. "Did you want to watch the next episode?"

"Yes, please," Ashe said, feeling small.

Dedue clicked the remote, then settled his arm over Ashe's shoulders. Ashe leaned into the warmth, curling into Dedue's side and interweaving their fingers. His brother and sister might be jerks, but this was rather nice.

The final cake-baking contest was intense, just as the previews had promised and as soon as the winner was announced, the next recorded season of the cake competition began playing. It was easy to see how someone could get sucked into a show for hours of their life, though Ashe had never had that luxury. He stretched and rubbed his eyes, pleased to note that the wine no longer hovered on the edges of his thoughts.

"Are you leaving?" Dedue asked.

"I...I really should." Ashe bit his lip, glancing down at his phone.

"Alright," Dedue said agreeably. "Let me walk you out."

They stood. Ashe stretched. Dedue popped his spine. They looked toward the door. Ashe looked away first. Dedue hesitated, then stooped to kiss him. It was quick and chaste, not a drawn out, lewdly suggestive thing. At the end of it, Dedue linked their hands once more.

"You'd be welcome any time," Dedue assured him. "Even if Dimitri is here. Your brother and sister, too. Sylvain and Felix might even give them a run for their money in Battle Brothers."

Ashe laughed at that. "That would be something to see. Thank you, Dedue. I had a wonderful night."

"As did I." A light tug, then Dedue was leading Ashe to the kitchen to collect the left-overs from dinner for the twins. They made it all the way to the front door when Ashe came to a sudden stop.

"Dedue, I..." His cheeks felt warm, his hands trembled slightly. "I think I'd...if it's still okay, I'd...I'd really like to stay.

Thick fingers brushed hair over his ear, that broad chest loomed in front of him. Ashe couldn't lift his eyes.

"I’d really like that, too," Dedue said, his voice quiet, yet still it reverberated through Ashe's bones. "There's no obligation if you do stay. We even have a guest bedroom in case you'd just like to sleep in a bed for a night."

"No, that's not...what I want." Ashe took Dedue's hand, glancing up timidly through his eyelashes. "I guess I'm not really sure what I want. I've never done this with anyone before. But I...I'd like to stay here. With you."

Dedue stooped. Ashe rose up on his toes. What started as a sweet and gentle kiss quickly became something more: Passionate and hungry, questing and questioning. Ashe pressed his hands against the hard muscles of Dedue's stomach. Dedue curled his hands around Ashe's waist, so broad they nearly encircled his hips entirely. Somehow, they got the food back into the fridge. Then Dedue was leading Ashe back towards the bedrooms.

Rather than turn on the overhead lights, Dedue clicked on a lamp just inside the door, bathing the room with soft, warm light. Ashe wasn't surprised to see that Dedue's bedroom was just as neat as the rest of the condo. He _was_ surprised to see that Dedue had his own private bathroom, just visible through an ajar door across the room. There weren't too many personal items around the room. One corner had a bench press and a few dumbbells that Ashe was pretty sure he'd need two hands to lift. Under the window was a two-shelf bookcase, mostly filled with cookbooks and body-building guides. Stacked on top of the shelf were a few cocktail recipe books which Ashe recognized from his bartending course. There was also a framed photo and the potted violet Ashe had brought as a gift. Curious, Ashe picked up the photo, smiling as he recognized a woman who could only have been Dedue's mother.

"She looks kind," Ashe said, setting the photo down gently.

"She was," Dedue confirmed. He had sat down on the edge of his bed--a massive thing and the most dominant piece of furniture in the room--and seemed to be watching Ashe nervously. "Would you like a change of clothes to sleep in? Nothing of mine would fit you, but Felix is just across the hall if you'd like to borrow something of his."

Ashe almost laughed. While it was true he and Felix stood at about the same height, he didn't think any of Felix's sleek designer clothes were going to fit comfortably. And all things fair, he'd rather use one of Dedue's shirts than borrow clothing from anyone else. Instead of answering, Ashe crossed the room and stood in front of Dedue, draping his arms over Dedue's shoulders, nudging Dedue's knees apart so he could stand between them.

"I'm fine if you're fine," Ashe offered.

Dedue's hands traced his sides, coming to rest at his waist. "We don't have to do anything."

"What if I want to?" Ashe pressed forward, leaning into Dedue's chest, catching his lower lip between his teeth. Dedue pulled him in closer, deepening the kiss with his tongue. At first it was enough just to kiss, just to feel. It was thrilling to be all alone in a bedroom with someone he loved. Ashe was nervous and excited and in love and in lust. He still wasn't sure exactly what he wanted--it might be enough just to fall asleep in Dedue's arms. But it also might be exciting to do a little more than kiss.

It was with an intense caution that Ashe reached for the hem of Dedue's t-shirt. He lifted it a few inches, then paused, leaning back to make sure it was alright. Dedue's green eyes were calm and sure as he leaned back, rolling his shoulders back and raising his arms, making it easier for Ashe to pull the shirt free. Those tiny bouncer shirts had never really hidden much, but Ashe's breath caught at the expanse of dark, well-muscled skin. He placed his hands--vibrating with nervous energy--on the knotted balls of Dedue's shoulders, following the rounded curve to the biceps thicker around than Ashe's waist. Swallowing hard, his hands fluttered to Dedue's collarbone, tracing the valley between flat, hard pectorals, then running his palms down the ridges of Dedue's abs. He nearly jumped as the muscles tightened and shivered. Ashe blinked and looked up in concern.

Dedue's smile was small. "I'm nervous," he explained.

Ashe laughed. "What do you have to be nervous about? You're gorgeous."

Dedue blushed, which was so adorable Ashe had no idea what to do about it. Rough fingertips teased Ashe's skin just beneath his shirt. "May I?"

Ashe nodded, trying to hide his own nerves. Dedue pulled his shirt up and off and Ashe resisted covering himself. He didn't have time to work out, so he didn't have a ghost of the definition that Dedue had. He was only as slender as he was due to years of skimping on food in order to make sure the twins had enough to eat. It was just a little intimidating standing bare in front of someone as sculpted as Dedue.

Whatever Dedue thought of Ashe's body, he kept to himself. Broad hands slid down Ashe's back, pulling them chest to chest. As they kissed, Ashe felt Dedue's thumbs dig into his hip bones, hands sliding low enough to make him shiver and gasp. He tugged Dedue's hair free of its tie, running his hands through it, fingers scrubbing through the closely shaved sides. Skin-on-skin contact was heady and warm; Ashe wanted more of it. Desire was like electricity running through him, currents arcing from his lips to his groin, setting his blood on boil.

Just when Ashe's lips were beginning to feel slightly bruised and abused, Dedue's hands curled beneath his ass and lifted, tugging Ashe into his lap with a manly squeal. Ashe was barely conscious of straddling Dedue's lap to place a knee on either side of him before lips were on his neck, hands in the small of his back, spine arching in pleasure so intense in was almost pain. He'd never known his neck was so sensitive, nor that it could send such sensations directly to his cock, which he felt sure had never been quite this hard before. The constraint placed on it by his jeans was painful and though he wanted to reach down and ease it, he couldn't remove his hands from Dedue's back, where he was holding on for dear life as Dedue continued his assault on Ashe's neck and collarbone.

One hand pressed against Ashe's spine, drawing him even closer, making him arch up even higher then--

Ashe gasped and cried out, loudly, as Dedue's tongue lathed over a nipple. His nails dug into the hard muscles of Dedue's back, though he wasn't fully conscious of that action. His entire body shuddered and shivered, toes curling as his eyes rolled back. He only just barely came back to himself as his hips jerked a hard thrust against Dedue's stomach. His eyes wide in shock at his own body's actions, Ashe tried to regain control of himself. It helped that Dedue had stopped his ministrations, head tipped back to look up at Ashe.

"Do you want to stop?" Dedue asked.

"No," Ashe breathed without a trace of hesitation.

"I won't hurt you," Dedue said.

"I know that," Ashe replied.

They held each other's gazes a beat longer, then, almost as if they had agreed to it out loud, Ashe swung one leg over Dedue's lap and Dedue set Ashe gently down in the bed, leaning over him to kiss him. Long, loose strands of white hair tickled Ashe's face. He clung to Dedue's arms, afraid that if he let go, the moment might end. Then Dedue was kissing his neck again and Ashe lost the ability to think about anything else. What was it about neck kisses that made him go so weak? Or was it just the fact that it was Dedue doing it?

Dedue shifted onto an elbow, kissing Ashe's shoulder as his hand slid lower and lower. He pulled back as his thumb rested on the button of Ashe's jeans, eyes almost black in the dim light. "Ashe, is it alright if--"

"Yeah. Yes." Ashe reached for the zipper of his pants, lifted his hips. He was trembling a little, but it wasn't from fear. He still wasn't sure how far he was willing to take all of this, but if there was one thing he was sure of, it was Dedue.

Ashe gasped as cool air met the blood-warm skin of his hips and thighs, the denim slowly being pulled down by Dedue. Perhaps he'd thought something like this might happen, as he'd actually thought to wear a newer pair of underwear: green briefs with gray trim, the elastic new enough that it wasn't stretched or faded from too many washes. He was a bit embarrassed to feel his member straining against the fabric, but then again, Dedue was likely in a similar state himself.

And, likely, Dedue was much--

Ashe nearly choked on that thought.

Dedue covered Ashe's body with his own, kissing and running fingers through Ashe's hair. Ashe arched against the hard body above his, hands holding onto Dedue's biceps like he feared falling. A subtle shift of weight, then a hand was running down Ashe's neck, thumbing a nipple, ghosting over non-existent abs, toying with the edge of the elastic.

Sneaking beneath, slowly, giving Ashe more than enough time to voice an objection.

He didn't, of course. He tucked his face into Dedue's neck and gasped as those rough fingertips ghosted first down, then up his shaft. Ashe shuddered and bit his lip as a thumb circled the pre-moistened tip of his cock, then slid down the length again, resting where the shaft met the balls.

"Ashe, can I--"

"Please," Ashe begged, voice thin and high, straining almost as hard as his cock was. "Please, Dedue, I--"

He screamed as the hand closed around him, though it was far, far from painful. His hips leapt up with a will all their own, rutting into Dedue's calloused palm. Ashe tried to take control of himself, but it was near impossible, his instincts and hormones having taken over all his higher functions. He almost could have cried in helplessness, but it felt too good to want it to stop. Dedue was warm and gentle and for once, it felt good to just let go and let someone else take control. Ashe tucked his head tight to Dedue's chest, closed his eyes and gave in to his desires.

Though Ashe's body sought to set the rhythm, Dedue kept his movements methodical and firm with a steady pressure and pace. Eventually Ashe's hips settled into the motion, thrusting up when Dedue's hand came down, pulling back as it slid up. He knew he was making strange and new noises into Dedue's neck, but Ashe couldn't have controlled that if he wanted to. Everything was too new, too exciting, too unexpected.

The one familiar sensation was the one building up in the pit of Ashe's stomach, rapidly coming to a head. And while he really wanted it to keep building until it burst, he also had enough sense left to him that he didn't want to come in his underwear.

"D-Dedue," Ashe gasped. "St-stop. Please, I--"

Dedue did stop, not instantly, but slowly, the way a ride at a carnival would stop. He removed his hand from Ashe's briefs and as Ashe opened his eyes, he was shocked to see Dedue swipe his tongue over his thumb, tasting the wetness there. Ashe squeaked, unable to form words.

"Are you alright?" Dedue asked, his eyes concerned.

"Yes, I--I almost--I didn't want--" Ashe felt his cheeks burn, embarrassed at how quickly he'd almost reached his climax. "Um, can I--Is it alright if, if I... To you?"

Dedue looked gravely amused by Ashe's lack of syntax. He pushed off the bed, standing up as his hands went to the buttons of his jeans. Rather than a zipper, there were five buttons to be undone, which Ashe found irrationally sexy and Dedue popped each one slowly and methodically before sliding his jeans down his hips and stepping out of them. He wore gray boxer briefs beneath and he seemed uncertain as to whether he should take those off as well while he remained standing.

Ashe, having regained at least a few of his blown brain cells, decided to help. He rolled over and shifted onto his knees, reaching out and tugging Dedue closer by his waistband. Just the outline he could see through the boxer briefs had Ashe swallowing his own tongue in excitement and nerves. Slowly, he slid the waistband down, lifting it up and over an erection that probably should have been weighed and measured for the world record. Ashe froze, jaw dropping, boxer briefs only halfway down Dedue's thighs as he simply marveled at it. He'd expected it to be big and he wasn't disappointed--it was more than proportional to Dedue's body size. The shock, really, was in the girth. Had he cared to measure, he would have found it as big around as his own wrist. The next shiver than ran through him felt a little closer to fear than to excitement.

"Ashe." Gentle fingers in his hair. Ashe tore his gaze away from the monster in front of him to look up into his sweet and gentle boyfriend's face. "We don't have to do anything you don't want to."

"I--I do. I just..." Ashe couldn't help looking down again. "I--I've never--"

"It's okay, Ashe, we can just--" Dedue took as step, as if to climb back in the bed, but Ashe boldly reached out and gripped the base of Dedue's cock. A thrill of terror shot through him at the realization that he couldn't close his hand around it entirely, but he licked his lips anyway and leaned forward. He heard a sharp inhalation of breath above him as he took just the crown into his mouth as that was really all that would fit. Still, he rocked his head and moved his hand in tandem, letting his tongue slide up against the cleft, around the ridge, then press against the slit. Featherlight fingers brushed his hair, then settled over the hand Ashe still rested on Dedue's hip. He found a comfortable rhythm to bob his head to with the tip of Dedue's cock pressed against the roof of his mouth, light suction and a bit of teasing with his tongue that was easy to maintain. He lathed away the precum, tasting salt and sweat and something maybe just a touch sweet, like a fruit's nectar. It wasn't how he'd imagined it at all.

Ashe felt a tremor wrack Dedue's body, then a hand was on his shoulder, pushing him back. A line of saliva stretched from the tip of Dedue's cock to Ashe's lips, drawing out before snapping, Ashe peering up at Dedue with a questioning look.

"I'm sorry." What was Dedue apologizing for? "I couldn't--if you kept going, I--"

"I don't mind," Ashe said, using his thumb to wipe saliva from his mouth. "Do you want me to keep going? It's alright if you--"

"No. Please." Dedue's chest was heaving, his breath coming fast. "I don't want to. Not yet."

Then he stooped low, a hand tipping Ashe's chin up for a deep, probing kiss. Ashe felt himself scooted backwards on the bed as Dedue climbed up over him, pushing him back into the pillows, hands roving over his body once more. Dedue must have finished stripping out of his boxer briefs at some point because he was naked now. He pulled back from the kiss only long enough to shoot Ashe a questioning look before sliding off Ashe's briefs.

Are we really going to do it? Ashe wondered as the kissing resumed. He'd wanted to, even after seeing Dedue's length, but he had to wonder: Was it even physically possible?

With Dedue on his elbows, there were inches of space between the two of them, sharing heat but not friction. Ashe couldn't keep his hands to himself, couldn't stop tracing the muscles of Dedue's chest, couldn't stop gripping the taut lines of his arms and shoulders. Suddenly, with a guttural growl that Ashe felt more than heard, Dedue clutched Ashe around the waist and flipped their positions so that Dedue leaned back against the pillows with Ashe in his lap. Ashe cried out in surprise and delight as Dedue's hot and heavy arousal slid past his own, resting solidly against his stomach. They were pressed together chest to chest, not an inch of space between them. After a moment of adjusting against each other, Dedue cupped his hands beneath Ashe's ass--sending shivers up his spine--and slid Ashe bodily against him, their cocks sliding past one another between them.

Ashe gasped and moaned, gripping Dedue's shoulders, using his legs to help with the slide. It felt so good, so warm, the sweat building between them to help with the slide. Dedue's hands were rough and real, helping ground Ashe in the moment rather than lose himself to sensation. He buried his face in Dedue's neck, panting as the pace became erratic, Dedue's chest heaving with breath beneath him, Ashe's hips stuttering forward in fits and starts. Heat and pressure were coiling in Ashe's stomach, his balls tightening, his thighs trembling.

"Ashe," Dedue panted. "Is it alright if--"

"Yes!" Ashe screamed, because he was already over the edge and spilling over; there was no longer any chance to pull back. He felt the spill between them, pulsing and hot, slippery and wet. His heartbeat was a rapid tattoo against his ribs and as his head came to rest on Dedue's shoulder, he could see his heartbeat echoed by the pulse in Dedue's throat. Dedue was beautiful in his release: Head tossed back against the pillows, mouth slightly open, eyes shut. His white hair was a spill against dark pillowcases. Sweat beaded on the back of his neck. Ashe leaned in and lapped at it, tasting salt and sweetness and Dedue. He actually startled a short laugh out of Dedue as he did it.

They spent long moments just breathing. Then Dedue shifted Ashe in his lap, moving him so that Ashe sat on one of his thighs, arms wrapped loosely around his middle, head resting on Dedue's chest. It seemed impossible that any one man could be as big as Dedue, but Ashe loved every inch of him. He rested on hand on Dedue's chest, marking Dedue's breath by it, slowly becoming hypnotized as their breathing synced.

When Ashe shivered, sweat and other fluids drying on his skin, Dedue groaned and flexed.

"We should clean up," Dedue advised, helping Ashe slide off of him and onto the bed. Before standing, Dedue grabbed a tissue from the bed stand and swiped at the worst of the mess. After a cursory attempt at cleaning himself, he passed the tissue box to Ashe. "I'm going to wash off." He gestured to the bathroom. "Feel free to use anything of mine. I'd like you to feel comfortable here."

"I do," Ashe assured him, smiling shyly as he wiped up the worst of the mess. Dedue padded off to the bathroom as Ashe grabbed another tissue. He listened to the water running in the sink as Dedue cleaned up, thinking he might like to borrow a shirt to sleep in. After setting the tissue box back on the bed stand, Ashe noted a small drawer, curiosity driving him to open it. While he wasn't entirely surprised by what he found, the squeeze bottle of lube and the black and gold box inside still made him blush.

Maybe next time, Ashe thought, letting the drawer slide silently closed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I would love to be able to write more for these two; theirs is such a sweet and happy love story. Right now, I don't have another chapter planned, but if you're interested in seeing more Ashe and Dedue from me, please check out my [Twitter](https://twitter.com/ShiroKabocha1) for more information. As always, thanks so much for reading!


	4. New Year's Kiss

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A little late, but it’s a New Year’s Eve party at Dimitri’s apartment with our favorite members of the Blue Lion Nightclub. Will Ashe get to enjoy his first New Year’s Eve party with his boyfriend, or will he spend the whole night keeping an eye on his mischievous siblings?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was hoping to post this much earlier in the month, so sorry guys! I hope you still like it even though New Year's has passed.

"The flame thrower! Get the flame thrower!"

"_You_ get the flame thrower! I'm trying not to die here!"

"Would you stop playing around and get serious!"

"Geez, Felix, they're just kids."

Felix let loose a violent sigh as he tossed his controller down. "Kids that just killed me!"

"Nice job, Cinda."

"You too, Cole. Hang on, I'm coming with the flame thrower."

"Damn it!" Sylvain squealed, trying to defend himself on both sides. "Two on one isn't fair!"

Ashe leaned over the kitchen counter to peek in on his brother and sister sitting in Dimitri's living room, playing on a TV that was bigger than both of their beds put together back at home. He smiled as his younger brother and sister defeated Sylvain on the video game they were playing and then attempted to bully Felix and Sylvain into playing another round.

"They're getting along," Dedue assured him from the counter, his dark hands covered in flour as he kneaded the buckwheat dough. "I told you Sylvain and Felix would be good so long as Ingrid's here."

"I wasn't worried about Sylvain and Felix," Ashe admitted, looking out at the over-sized sofa one more time before turning back to the work in the kitchen. "I'm still not sure if they were joking about stealing a sip of Sylvain's drink."

"I'm sure they didn't," Dedue told him, smiling softly. "It's a party. They're just in a festive mood."

"I'm just so worried they'll break something," Ashe said, rolling thin slices of pickled herring before spearing them with toothpicks. "Or say accidentally say something rude. Or intentionally say something rude."

"You're worried about them being rude to Sylvain and Felix?" Dedue asked, raising a skeptical eyebrow. "I'm more worried about them learning bad habits from those two."

"From Sylvain and Felix?" Ashe looked up, surprised. "I know Felix starts fights sometimes, but the twins already know how to do that. And Sylvain's always so kind."

"’Kind’ is a nice word for it." Dedue smirked, which was more than a little sexy, Ashe had to admit. "Sylvain is a flirt who drinks and Felix has a tendency towards violence and swearing. Yes, I'm more concerned about your brother and sister picking up bad habits than I am about them being rude to Sylvain and Felix."

"It would only do the both of them some good, anyway," Dimitri said, rounding a corner into the kitchen. He was tapping on his phone, so he spoke without looking up. "Your brother and sister are destroying them at that game and Sylvain can't flirt his way out of it and Felix can't start a fight, since they're both kids. It's good for them to face a challenge."

"Dimitri, thanks again for inviting us over for New Year's Eve," Ashe said to his boss and boyfriend's best friend. "Really, it was so kind of you, especially since my brother and sister are so, um, well... They're heathens, really, but I did the best I could with them."

Dimitri gave a short laugh, glancing up briefly from his phone. "Thank you for helping Dedue cook all the food for tonight. I'm happy to finally meet your brother and sister. Dedue told me they enjoyed Battle Brothers but I didn't realize--"

There was a noise like a crash from the next room, then a shouted challenge from Felix: "You can't just grab someone and jump off the edge of the arena! That's cheating!"

"If it were cheating, it wouldn't be a valid game mechanic!" Cinda hollered right back, undaunted by the current bouncer and dispute-settler of the nightclub known as The Blue Lion. "If you don't like it, don't let yourself get grabbed!"

"Cinda, be nice!" Ashe shouted, forgetting, for a moment, that he wasn't in his own kitchen in the tiny apartment he shared with his brother and sister. He flushed scarlet until Dimitri added his own shout to the mix.

"Felix, be a better loser!"

Ashe couldn't help but smile as the hubbub in the living room died down, helped along by a stern admonishment by Ingrid.

"Did you want a glass of wine, Dimitri?" Dedue asked, already reaching for a wine glass.

"Ye--No." Dimitri looked up from his phone long enough to shoot a glance at Ashe. "The sparkling cider will be fine."

"Oh, please, don't feel like you can't drink just because the twins are here," Ashe begged. "I feel bad enough you're not serving your guests any alcohol because of them. You should at least enjoy a glass of wine in your own home, especially on New Year's Eve."

While Dimitri hesitated, Dedue poured him a glass of wine and handed it to him. He started to ask "Are you sure?" but then a knock sounded on the front door and he left to go and answer it.

"He's too nice," Ashe observed, finishing with his rolls of pickled herring. "He didn't have to change his New Year's plans just for us."

"He did," Dedue said simply. "Otherwise, I would have gone to celebrate with you and your family, and then he'd have no one to cook for his guests."

Ashe laughed. "You didn't actually tell him that, did you?"

"I didn't have to," Dedue replied. "When he was making the guest list, I told him I was inviting you and the twins. He made all the changes to the usual set up himself."

Dimitri threw an intimate little New Year's Eve party every year, inviting only close friends and coworkers. It meant shutting down the club on a popular party night, but Dimitri had said "Let the Black Eagle club deal with the customers. My team should be with their families and loved ones on New Year's." As Ashe had only begun working for the club in the past year, he'd never been invited to one of these parties before, so he'd been nervous about bringing his brother and sister along. He shouldn't have worried: As soon as Dedue told them that Sylvain and Felix could take them on in the latest version of Battle Brothers, both had vowed to be on their best behavior.

Ashe wasn't sure how these parties usually went, but he guessed there was usually quite a bit of drinking involved. On learning that Ashe's brother and sister were both minors, Dimitri had declared that anyone who wished to drink would have to bring their own alcohol, so Felix and Sylvain had brought a handle of whiskey and several bottles of soda, but as far as Ashe could tell, even they weren't drinking heavily. At least, not with Ingrid pouring their drinks for them.

"Hello, hello!" Mercedes chirped, entering the kitchen with a covered tray that smelled simply divine. Annette followed her in, clutching a heavy-looking bag to her chest that she was still arguing with Dimitri about not needing help with.

"Hi Mercedes! Annette!" Ashe replied, smiling brightly. As he washed his hands to greet them, Mercedes came around the counter, first placing a kiss on Ashe's cheek, then stretching on her toes to do the same to Dedue. "Happy New Year's Eve!"

"Happy New Year's Eve!" Annette and Mercedes chorused. Annette let her bag thud heavily onto the counter and started pulling out mixers. "I brought the ingredients for margaritas! Who wants one?"

"You know I do," Mercedes told her. "Ashe, where can I put these?" She held up a tray of perfectly frosted cupcakes.

"I think the food is supposed to go on the dining room table," he told her, pointing. "But everything seems to be ending up on the coffee table in the living room."

Mercedes laughed. "I'll set these on the table, then come back to help."

"Oh, but we don't need any--" Ashe really wanted to get back to being alone with Dedue in the kitchen, as unrealistic a dream as that was. But then he realized Mercedes hadn't been offering to help him and Dedue--she had been offering to help Annette, who was haphazardly mixing things in a blender she was unfamiliar with operating. Ashe kept her from making a mess until Mercedes returned and finished mixing up the drinks.

"And just a little bit for the chefs." Mercedes poured the blended drink into red plastic cups for Ashe and Dedue, then linked her arm through Annette's as she picked up her own cup. "Will you two come join us at some point, or will you be slaving away in the kitchen all night?" 

Ashe blushed and stuttered at her implication, but Dedue only smiled. "We'll be out before midnight."

"Okay!" She raised her cup to them before following the explosive sounds of video game combat to the living room.

"That dough looks amazing, Dedue," Ashe said, leaning over one of Dedue's flexing biceps to see the dough he was kneading. "Be careful not to over-do it, because--"

Dedue swooped low, silencing Ashe with a kiss on his lips and making him blush. "Or else it will get too crumbly for noodles. I know."

"I know you know," Ashe mumbled, face still red. "I'm sorry. I'm more used to supervising the twins in the kitchen."

"That's what makes it endearing," Dedue told him. He began rolling out the dough as Ashe garnished the plate of herring. "Ashe, I meant to ask, but is there anything special you and your family typically do for New Year's? Anything I interrupted by inviting you here tonight?"

"Oh, no, mostly we just cook and play games, so pretty much what we're doing tonight." Ashe laughed. "It's not much, but it was always a night I was home and they didn't have homework, so we just, sort of...hung out together?"

"That sounds nice," Dedue said, well aware that Ashe rarely took any time to simply "hang out." 

"Yeah," Ashe agreed. "But this is really so much better. Celebrating with friends and food and--" Ashe cut himself off, feeling another blush coming on. This was the first year ever he was dating someone over New Year's Eve and ever since Dedue had invited him, he'd been thinking about getting his first-ever New Year's kiss. They kissed all the time, so it seemed foolish to look forward to a kiss at midnight so much, but he couldn't help it. He only hoped Dedue felt the same.

Apparently, Dedue felt _something_ because he wiped his hands off on his apron, snagged Ashe around the waist and pulled him up for a kiss. Ashe rose up on his toes, looped an arm around Dedue's neck and pulled him in closer. There was something incredibly sexy about the flour stuck on the backs of Dedue's hands, of the smell of baking, of the heat one only finds in the kitchen. When Dedue let Ashe back down onto his heels, the tiny chef felt a headier rush than a double shot of vodka. Cooking was his passion. Dedue was his love.

Ashe was just pulling a tray of pigs-in-blankets from the oven when Ingrid stuck her head inside the kitchen.

"We convinced the four children to let us put on a movie," she explained, stealing a biscuit-wrapped hot dog off Ashe's tray. "Is there anything you don't want your brother and sister watching?"

"Ah, probably anything you approve of is fine, Ingrid." The twins lived on action movies and games, so he didn't try to shield them from violence. They were almost adults now, anyway. Their final school term was all that separated them from the mysterious and weary "adulthood" that Ashe had known since he'd turned sixteen.

"Okay." She glanced over to see Dedue cutting the dough into noodles and frowned. "Doesn't Dimitri have a pasta maker? Why don't you just use that?" She drew back as Ashe and Dedue both gave her scandalized looks. "Fine, fine! I withdraw the question." After stealing one more hot dog, she went back to the living room to help pick a movie.

"I'll wait to cook these until just before midnight," Dedue said, sprinkling his finely cut soba noodles with starch. "We could go out and join the others, if you like."

"But we still have a few more appetizers to finish making," Ashe protested. "And the broth for the soba, and the sliced vegetables..." He trailed off to take a sip from the margarita Annette had left him--for courage. "And I'd rather stay in here with you."

Dedue didn't seem to know what to say to that. Or maybe there was nothing to say. All Ashe knew was that he was crowded up against a counter until Dedue slipped his hands around Ashe's waist and lifted, setting him on the edge of Dimitri's counter so they could kiss. And kiss. And do none of the things Ashe had said they needed to do. They rarely found the time for such affection, as Ashe was often working, and when he wasn't working, he was taking care of his siblings--but lately Ashe had begun keeping one night a week to himself--a night off work and a night off watching his nearly-graduated younger brother and sister. And he spent that night curled up on Dimitri's couch binge-watching old cooking shows in between kisses with Dedue. And when Dedue urged him to stay the night, he often agreed. He even had some clothes stored in Dedue's room, along with a toothbrush in Dedue's attached bathroom, but as soon as that thought hit him, he desperately wished he hadn't brought his brother and sister here for New Year's Eve. If they found the second toothbrush, they were bound to tease him mercilessly.

"Is something wrong?" Dedue asked, sensing Ashe's sudden spike in anxiety enough to stop kissing him for a moment.

"It's just, ah..." Ashe hesitated. "I should probably not drink anymore. Not if I'm going to get the twins home after midnight."

Dedue's brow furrowed in confusion. "I thought they were staying the night in Dimitri's guest room."

"Yes, but, um." Dedue didn't have siblings, so how did Ashe explain the exquisite torture that was a teenaged set of twins who knew his every weak spot? "You know, Sylvain and Felix have been drinking and I was just thinking how it might be better, if, you know, the twins didn't start thinking drinking was cool."

"You are a bartender," Dedue reminded him dutifully.

"Oh. Right." Ashe thought for a minute, then sighed and gave up. "I don't want them teasing me about how I stay over with you sometimes. I...don't want them knowing that I keep things here."

"There's no reason for them to go in my room," Dedue said softly. "But they already know you sleep here sometimes, don't they?"

"It's different," Ashe assured him, though he couldn't qualify how. Before he could try, Dedue's lips were back on his, a hand pressed against the small of his back, pulling him against Dedue's perfectly muscled body.

"Please say you'll stay tonight," Dedue whispered, the heat of his breath sending shivers down Ashe's spine. "I've never spent New Year's with anyone before. I want my first time to be with you."

That was unfair and Ashe would have called Dedue out for it, but just then a ringing voice cried out: "Gross!"

Ashe twisted around as Dedue straightened to his full height, both peering into the dining room, where the usually cluttered table had been cleared for appetizers. Cinda had picked up a plate and was scowling over at her older brother.

"Aren't you supposed to do that in a room or something?" She gave both of them a highly offended look as she began piling snacks onto her plate. "It's traumatizing, you know, picturing my brother as if he, like, has sex and stuff."

"Cinda!" Ashe shouted, mortified. "That's not what--We weren't just--How could you--"

"They wouldn't have sex in the kitchen," Dimitri said, following Cinda into the dining room without looking over at Ashe and Dedue. "Dedue is a beast about following health code regulations, even in a private kitchen."

"Ashe is the same," Cinda said as she drowned a pig-in-blanket in mustard. "So annoying. And he makes me and Cole do all the cleaning, too. Just rude."

"That's because I do all the cooking," Ashe said, defending himself. He placed a hand on Dedue's chest to push him back so that Ashe could jump down from the counter. "Once you're out of school, if you would like to start cooking dinner, I'd be happy to clean up. And then I'd know the kitchen was actually clean to satisfaction for once."

As eloquently as possible, Cinda rolled her eyes.

"Are you graduating soon?" Dimitri asked politely. He surveyed all of the appetizers--there was everything from shrimp to cavier, from cupcakes to canapes--and selected a single carrot spear from a veggie platter. "Do you have any plans after graduation?"

"I'm going to start working," she announced with no small amount of pride. "My brother--the other one, not this one--" she explained with a flick of her wrist, "--Is making Ashe pay for him to go to college."

"That isn't fair," Ashe insisted. "He's getting quite a bit handled through scholarships. I'm just helping with books and things."

"And his portion of the rent and the food he eats," Cinda recited.

"Couldn't you go to school also?" Dimitri asked, looking confused. He looked over at Ashe. "I'm sure my employee fund helps dependents if you require it."

"Ah, well, maybe." Ashe turned scarlet. He was already considering applying to the educational fund to earn his high school diploma and he felt it was greedy to request more to cover Cole's education. What if someone else needed that fund? But just in case, he was holding off on his request, just to make sure Cole didn't need it more than he did. Ashe had no idea what college textbooks cost these days and he had a feeling he was in for a shock.

"I'm going to be a waitress," Cinda declared. "I'm going to save my tips, take creative cooking courses, and then open my own catering business. Or food truck. Or cafe. I haven't decided yet."

"It sounds like you have it all planned out," Dimitri said kindly. "If you'd like to work as a waitress, why not apply to my club? You'd have your brother there and Dedue, of course. Annette could tell you all about the work, if you're interested."

Ashe held his breath as Cinda wrinkled her nose in preparation for one of her more vehement refusals. He had already pitched the idea of having Cinda work at the Blue Lion nightclub. He'd liked the idea of having her close by so that if anything went wrong he--or rather, more likely, Dedue--could put a stop to the offending party before anything got out of hand. And the tips were good, Ashe himself could attest to that.

But instead of the fiery diatribe that Ashe had gotten when he'd made the suggestion, Cinda blew a breath out through her nose and said, quite politely: "That's a very kind offer, but what I'd really like is to make my own way. And I'd really rather work at a place that serves food--preferably high-end food--so I can learn about it and what pairs well with what and figure out the difference between a three dollar hamburger and a twenty dollar hamburger." She paused for a moment, mouth quirked as she tipped her head to the side. "I guess that doesn't make much sense, does it?"

"I think it makes perfect sense," Dimitri assured her, looking impressed. "But I can tell you the difference between a three dollar burger and a twenty dollar burger, if you'd like."

"Oh?" Cinda looked politely intrigued. Ashe was actually dumbstruck: Who knew that Cinda--irascible, explosive and sometimes violent Cinda--could have such a polite and mature-sounding conversation? "Does it have to do with how far the ingredients have to travel from farm to plate?"

"No," Dimitri chuckled.

"This should be good," Dedue whispered to Ashe. "He can't even taste the difference between ketchup and soy sauce, let alone two different burgers."

Dimitri, possibly overhearing him, looked over and smiled before completing his thought. "The difference is in the company you keep while eating either one."

Cinda looked confused, the same way Ashe felt. But Dedue looked impressed.

"If I'm dining with donors to my hospitals, or members of the board or renowned surgeons, I'm going to eat the twenty dollar burger," Dimitri explained. "But if I'm out with my close friends, we're all going to eat the three dollar burger. Not because it's any better or worse than the twenty dollar one, but the company matters more than the food, so what difference does the price make?"

It was the first time Ashe ever felt a flicker of affection for his boss. He respected Dimitri, of course, and he was more than grateful for the club owner's generosity, but in spite of their connection through Dedue, Ashe and Dimitri simply had little in common. But what he said about company and food was spot on. If he wasn't already dating the greatest man on the planet, he might have swooned just a tiny bit.

Dedue, on the other hand, looked as if he might break down and sob. Ashe patted his hand comfortingly.

"You talk real well," Cinda said, remaining cool and aloof. She picked up a crystal-cut goblet that was being used to hold marinara sauce for shrimp. She held it up to the gold and glass chandelier, turning it so it cast sparkly rainbows over every surface. "But you've never actually eaten a three dollar burger, have you?"

Ashe covered his face in horror, wishing he could sink through the floor.

"Well, no," Dimitri admitted, looking embarrassed at Cinda's call-out over his wealth. "More like six or seven dollars. The sentiment is the same, however."

"I've never had a three dollar burger, either," Cinda said, setting the goblet down with reverence before meeting Dimitri's eyes steadily. "If a burger cost more than a dollar, I simply cooked one up myself."

She picked up her plate and strutted back to the living room without a backwards glance.

"I'm so sorry for her, Dimitri," Ashe moaned. "She's not what you would call polite, but she usually isn't that rude, either."

"She certainly doesn't hold back, that's true," Dimitri said with a chuckle. "You don't have to worry about that one."

"The movie is starting!" Ingrid called from the living room. Dimitri finished fixing himself a plate of snacks, accepted a glass of wine from Dedue, and returned to the living room.

"Do we have much else to do here?" Dedue asked, looking around the kitchen.

Ashe held up a finger, indicating that Dedue wait while he finished taking a long, long drink from his freshly topped-off margarita. How abrasive did Cinda have to be, really? Did she know she couldn't be that rude when working as a hostess or waitress? Where did he go wrong with her?

Dedue gently set his hand over Ashe's, lowering the cup after a long enough pull. "I certainly don't mind you drinking if it means you'll stay the night, but you shouldn't let your sister drive you to drink."

"Ah," Ashe sighed. "I just worry."

"I know." Dedue stooped over him to press a kiss on his lips. "Help me clean up a little? Then we can join everyone else for the movie."

"Of course."

With Dedue in the kitchen, cleaning up was almost as fun as cooking. Maybe even a little more: They were both serious cooks, who liked to focus rather than chat and flirt while they were creating. Aside from a few requests of "taste this" or a bit of hand-brushing as they worked, they didn't play around much while cooking. But cleaning was always a lot of elbow-rubbing, gentle pinches, traded kisses and teasing tickles. Ashe almost regretted joining the others in the living room as he wanted to take advantage of his Dedue-time as much as possible. Maybe he would stay the night.

With that thought in mind, Ashe topped off his margarita again before slipping his hand inside Dedue's and crossing the opulent apartment to the shadowy living room, darkened so as better to see Dimitri's movie-theater-sized TV. They had chosen some sort of hero movie with a lot of action, not something Ashe had seen before. He wasn't especially interested in it, either, though, because the only seat left in the room was Dedue's monstrously overstuffed chair and after Dedue sat down, he tugged Ashe into his lap. Ashe only resisted for a minute, thinking of his brother and sister, but then the slide of Dedue's hand on his side and the warm feeling from his frozen drink made his mind up for him: He curled into Dedue's lap sideways, so he could at least pretend to watch the movie while silently making out with his boyfriend.

Yeah, staying the night was probably the right way to go. If he was staying past midnight anyway, then why walk home in the cold when there was a perfectly warm bed for him here?

Ashe wasn't sure how long the movie took, but he was surprised when someone flicked the lights on after it ended. He broke a kiss with Dedue to look for his brother and sister, hoping they'd somehow fallen asleep as they used to when they were children. No such luck, of course. They'd located Ashe within seconds of the lights coming on and their faces lit with twin expressions of disgust and malice.

I'll never hear the end of this, Ashe thought to himself.

"Oh my, it's almost midnight," Mercedes announced loudly amid the groans and stretches of people who had fallen half asleep during the movie.

"It is?" Dedue and Ashe asked in unison. Wide-eyed, they checked the time and leapt to their feet. They should have started pouring champagne into flutes twenty minutes ago! They raced back to the kitchen, Ashe hurrying to set out glasses while Dedue popped a few bottles of champagne. Mercedes and Annette helped pass out the flutes of champagne to everyone as they were filled--Annette mistakenly giving a glass to Cole and Cinda, only to be caught by Ingrid before they could take a sip. Ashe scolded the both of them (with Annette cringing beneath Mercedes' glare) while Dedue poured them each a glass of sparkling cider instead. Dimitri turned on the TV for the live countdown to midnight. Ashe and Dedue set their flutes of champagne to the side as they began preparing the soba for just after midnight. Dedue put on a pot to boil, muttering to himself about forgetting to start much sooner. Ashe diced up the fresh ingredients to be added to the soup, hurrying as he listened to the TV countdown the final minutes of the old year.

"I can't believe we didn't set an alarm," Ashe moaned, trying to be neat with his knife cuts even as he hurried. "I didn't think we'd get so distracted by the movie."

"I don't think the movie was the distracting part." Ashe glanced back over his shoulder in time to catch a smile from Dedue. "I think the distraction was worth it."

"Me too," Ashe admitted.

"Gross." The soft voice made Ashe jump: He hadn't seen his brother walk into the kitchen. "I can help with the soup. It's okay if it takes a bit longer. You should come out for the countdown."

"We still have a little time," Ashe insisted, worrying over the ingredients. The noodles were all made, but they had to be cooked before they could be added to the broth. "Come back and help us after the countdown."

"Are you going to miss it?" Cole asked, slightly alarmed.

"No, no," Ashe assured him. "We'll be out in a minute. If you touch my champagne flute, I am going to chain you up outside to a parking meter."

Looking chagrined, Cole slunk out of the kitchen, his flute of cider still in his hand.

"Was he trying to switch the glasses?" Dedue asked, partially impressed.

"I think so. Probably on a dare." And then, before his brain could fully think the joke through, Ashe added: "Let's not have any more kids after these ones move out, okay?"

Ashe's laugh died as he caught Dedue's wide-eyed look of shock and confusion.

"I didn't mean--" Ashe just about swallowed his own tongue in trying to take back what he'd said. "I--I like kids. If you like kids. Not to imply that you want kids with me, I just--We've only been dating since--And I don't know if you--Is it hot in here?" Ashe fanned himself, gulping hard as Dedue held him pinned with his eyes alone.

"I, um." Dedue's turn to swallow hard. "I reacted poorly. You're right; it's a bit soon to be talking about children."

"Ha ha, yeah, right?" Ashe turned away to continue prepping the soup. He hoped the burn on his cheeks would fade soon; he could only blame his poor joke on the margaritas--Annette must have made them strong!

He was still intently chopping and preparing ingredients for the soba when shouting began over in the next room. His own thoughts of embarrassment kept him from responding when Dedue said his name. Once. Twice. Then, finally, Dedue clasped him by the arm and turned him around.

"Wha--"

"Three! Two!" They were counting down already! How could Ashe have missed it? He was making such a mess of this whole night; Dedue would probably never want to invite him to a party again and they--

The revelers in the other room screamed "One!" and then Dedue's lips were on Ashe's, his hands curled around Ashe's elbows to pull him in closer. It was a sweet kiss, quick and gentle. Their eyes met briefly, as if seeking permission first, then Ashe surged up on his toes and their lips met with crash. Ashe laced his fingers together behind Dedue's neck, pulling him lower even as Dedue wrapped his arms around Ashe's back to pull him up. Tongues slid past teeth, jousted each other, teased the roof of the other's mouth. Ashe hummed as one of Dedue's hands slid down his back to grab a handful of his ass. Dedue groaned as Ashe rocked their hips together.

Kissing was nothing new to either of them by now--they'd shared plenty of kisses and more. But there was something stronger about this one, something about the first kiss of the new year that made it special. Magical. Even after they broke the kiss, they spent long moments gazing into each other's eyes, smiling softly and swaying together almost as if dancing.

Ashe broke the silence first. He cleared his throat and started to speak. He only got as far as "I hope--" before his brother and sister were invading the kitchen, asking after the soba and stating how unsanitary it was for the chefs to be kissing in the kitchen

"The soba only just finished cooking," Ashe told them as he unwound from Dedue. "We'll have the bowls ready soon. Don't touch that!" He slapped Cinda's hand away from his champagne flute, which left the soba undefended long enough for Cole to sneak out a single noodle and eat it. With Dedue's help, Ashe got four bowls of soba prepared, then chased the twins out of the kitchen so they could give the bowls out to Dimitri and his guests. By the time they returned to the kitchen, Ashe and Dedue had finished the final bowls and set them on trays so the twins could efficiently deliver them to the living room.

"Phew!" Ashe swiped at his forehead. It might be cold outside, but it was hot in the kitchen. "A little late, but at least we got all the soba cooked and served, right?"

"Right," Dedue agreed. He motioned to their untouched champagne flutes. "Shall we toast?"

"Oh, right! I forgot." Ashe smiled sheepishly as he lifted his glass. "To the new year?"

"To us in the new year," Dedue supplied. Ashe echoed the sentiment with a tiny, blushing smile. They clinked glasses and drank. Just as they were setting the glasses down and getting ready for what Ashe suspected was another kiss, Felix and Sylvain came shoving and tripping each other into the kitchen, each trying to be the first to get a second bowl of soba. Ever the mediator, Dedue took both their bowls and turned his back on them as he refilled them, then handed the bowls over at the same time so neither could win. Ashe hid a smile; Dedue dealt with his friends almost the same way Ashe did with the twins.

"Oh, Dimitri said we could take the champagne to the living room," Sylvain remembered, turning back in the doorway. "Gotta finish it up, you know how it goes!"

Ashe didn't--he'd never actually had champagne on New Year's before, but he handed over the open bottle along with the last corked bottle. "Just make sure the twins don't get their hands on any, okay?"

"That's Ingrid's job," Sylvain laughed carelessly. Ashe was about to protest, but shortly after Sylvain disappeared, he heard a sharp slap and guessed that Ingrid had overheard him.

"I shouldn't leave the others to watch over my brother and sister," Ashe said regretfully. He wanted to stay in the kitchen with Dedue, but with the champagne on the loose, he knew it was his responsibility to keep an eye on his own kids.

"Let's take a bowl out," Dedue suggested, preparing two bowls of fresh soba. "I'll join you."

Out in the living room, Cinda and Cole had somehow convinced Felix and Sylvain to play Battle Brothers against them again. Felix agreed only if they played the new version, not the downloaded older version that matched the one the twins had at home. If he thought that would give them an advantage over Ashe's siblings, he was greatly mistaken. Ashe watched with amusement as the twins battled with Felix and Sylvain on almost equal ground: They didn't know all of the mechanics of this version of the game, but they had played enough of it earlier to figure out which of their strategies would work and which they had to modify. It didn't help that both Felix and Sylvain would scream their plans out loud to each other, which allowed the twins to subvert them. Cinda and Cole had long since developed silent video game telepathy, giving their opponents no chance to intercept their plans.

When Ashe finished his bowl of soba, Dedue took the plates to the kitchen. He started to clean up but when Ashe went to follow, Dimitri decreed that clean-up could wait until the following day. It was far too late to start such a thing tonight. After a wide yawn from Ingrid, she and the other women bid their farewells: Rather than call a cab or stagger home inebriated, both Mercedes and Annette would be sleeping over in Ingrid's apartment. As they left, Mercedes appeared as steady as always but Annette bounced off the door frame with a giggle, though it was hard to say whether or not that was her usual clumsiness or if she had overindulged in margaritas and champagne. Ingrid placed a guiding arm over Annette's shoulders and kept her from further self-harm as she guided the way to the elevator. With the women gone, Ashe took over monitoring the champagne, topping off Felix and Sylvain's glasses as well as his own and Dedue's. Dimitri declined more champagne in favor of finishing the bottle of wine he'd opened earlier.

The twins probably could have goaded Felix and Sylvain into playing video games all night, but after Ashe found himself nodding off against Dedue's side, he decided to call an end to the evening.

"Cinda, Cole, this is the last match," Ashe declared with a yawn.

"But Ashe!" Cinda and Cole whined in unison.

"We can watch them," Sylvain offered, smashing away delightedly on his controller. "You all were staying the night, right?"

"Um." It wasn't that Ashe didn't trust Sylvain and Felix with his brother and sister; it was more that he didn't trust his brother and sister with Sylvain and Felix. Dedue's friends simply weren't prepared to deal with the twins' antics.

"For the love of--" Felix nearly threw his controller down in frustration, catching himself at the last moment. "No, Ashe is right. It's time for kids to go to bed."

"Sore loser," Cole accused.

"It's not our fault you suck," Cinda taunted.

"Cinda, that was rude," Ashe admonished.

"No, she's right," Dimitri said without looking up from the book he was reading. "The fault lies with Felix."

"Then play me, you coward!" Felix demanded, rising to his feet.

"Another time." Dimitri set his book aside and stretched. "I'm trying to be polite and not kick you all out so I can go to bed, but your terrible playing has made me very sleepy."

Felix lunged for Dimitri, murder in his eyes, but both Sylvain and Dedue seemed to anticipate the attack, moving to catch him before he could land a punch on Dimitri's chin.

"I should let him hit you," Dedue said, even as he wrestled Felix back. "You did provoke him."

Dimitri gave a small smile as he shrugged. "Then next time let him hit me. For now, I'm going to bed."

"You heard him. Come on, guys." Ashe gestured to his brother and sister.

"We're still staying the night, aren't we?" Cinda asked, looking concerned.

"Yeah, I don't want to walk home now," Cole objected. "It's cold and anyone outside at this hour has been drinking. It's not safe."

Ashe glanced over at Dimitri, who was standing up to stretch. "Is it still alright if we stay the night?"

"It's more than alright," Dimitri assured him. "The guest room is set up already. Although, I take no credit for that as Dedue was the one who prepared it."

As Ashe corralled his siblings into cleaning up the video games, Sylvain convinced Felix that it was time to leave for the night. Rather than make the perilous journey back to his own apartment, Sylvain followed Felix to his apartment just down the hall, loudly bemoaning the fact that he'd forgotten to give each of the girls a kiss at midnight. Felix scoffed snidely at him as Dimitri closed the door to the apartment after them.

"Oh, Ashe, they don't have to clean--"

"Yes, they do." Ashe cut Dimitri off, emboldened by a mixture of margaritas and champagne. "We're guests in your home and we're not going to be overly disruptive. Right, guys?"

Cole and Cinda only cast dark glares up at their brother as they finished setting the living room to rights.

"And we'll clean the kitchen for you tomorrow," Ashe added.

"But Ashe!" the twins wailed.

"That's really not--" Dimitri started, but Ashe cut him off again.

"It's so gracious of you to host this party in your own home and I don't want to push all the clean-up onto you and Dedue." Mostly Dedue. All Dedue. Ashe was fairly certain that if Dimitri was left to his own devices to actually clean something, he would simply call in a service. "And Cole and Cinda are no strangers to washing dishes."

Cinda groaned and Cole pouted, each earning a pitiable look from Dimitri, as if they were homeless kittens left out in the rain.

"Let me show you to your room for the night," Dedue offered, more than used to the twins' antics by now. "One of you will have to sleep in the trundle bed; I hope that's okay."

"It's better than what they have at home," Ashe grumbled, disposing of an empty champagne bottle.

Dimitri smiled kindly. "Please do let me know if there's ever anything I could do to help out, Ashe. I know a few restaurant owners in town, if a phone call would help with your sister's employment."

"Thank you, but Cinda would likely skin me if she found out." Ashe chuckled. "She thinks that being independent means not accepting anyone else's help."

Dimitri arched a pale eyebrow. "I wonder where she got that from."

Ashe was still pondering that cryptic statement as he made his way to Dedue's bedroom, currently unoccupied, but comforting and familiar all the same. He brushed his teeth in the bathroom, then changed into one of Dedue's oversized shirts. For the first time ever, he was thinking about using Dedue's bed simply as a vehicle for sleep and not much else; drinking as much as he had had made him sleepy.

"The twins are settled," Dedue said, walking into the room and closing the door behind him. He smiled when he saw Ashe wearing nothing more than one of his shirts. "I tried to discourage them from getting up in the middle of the night to sample Dimitri's video game collection, but was unable to secure a promise."

"Getting up to play video games isn't the worst thing they could do," Ashe admitted through a wide yawn. He sat on the edge of Dedue's bed with a heavy bounce, watching unashamedly as his boyfriend stripped out of his clothes. "Thank you so much for inviting us tonight. My brother and sister aren't the easiest people to accommodate, especially at a party."

Dedue walked over to the bed, sliding one hand back through Ashe's hair before tipping his head back for a long, slow kiss. "Thank you for coming. I wouldn't have wanted to spend New Year's Eve any other way."

Ashe chuckled as he blushed, scooting backwards on the bed as Dedue climbed in with him. This was familiar between them now, but even still, Ashe shivered when Dedue ran his hands up his sides and pulled the t-shirt off over his head. He settled into the space between Dedue's massive forearms, kissing and being kissed, brushing pale hair back and tangling his legs with Dedue's in a slow, sensual slide. Before he'd dated anyone, Ashe had thought kissing and sex were serious affairs, full of smoldering looks and hard, passionate kisses. The reality was actually way better: He and Dedue both smiled and laughed as they traded touches and soft kisses, sometimes talking softly and sometimes saying nothing at all as they simply reveled in being in each other's arms. It was relaxing in a way even cooking and eating weren't, because when he was lying with Dedue, Ashe felt--for almost the first time ever--that nothing was expected out of him except to simply just be. With Dedue, Ashe could set the weight of the world aside and just let go.

Dedue broke their kissing first, pushing himself back on his elbows, that tiny soft smile that Ashe loved so much on his face. "We should go to sleep," he suggested. "We both work tomorrow and the twins are only in the next room."

"You're right," Ashe admitted with a reluctant sigh. He hadn't wanted the twins to discover the toothbrush he kept here--he certainly didn't want them to hear anything through the walls. Still, with the alcohol from the party still thrumming in Ashe's veins, he couldn't help but feel it was a bit of a waste to go to bed with Dedue and not do anything with him. "You know, it's not actually all that late," he pointed out as Dedue settled down onto his back and swept an arm beneath Ashe's head. "We get off shift from the club around this time. And the twins are heavy sleepers."

Dedue gave Ashe an amused look. "What are you suggesting?"

"Well." Ashe felt his face heat up but he barreled on anyway. "We could try to actually have sex."

Dedue frowned. "You know I don't want to hurt you."

"That's why we've been practicing." Ashe could only blame the alcohol for letting him speak so boldly. Even so, he felt his ears burn. "Dedue, I really want to take you all the--"

"I know." Dedue dropped a finger over Ashe's mouth, silencing him. "But I hardly think tonight is the night to try. Not with your brother and sister here."

"You're probably right," Ashe said with a sigh. He settled his head on Dedue's shoulder, snuggling in close. Dedue swept his arm around him, the other arm propped up behind his pillow. They should sleep, Ashe knew that, but still...Dedue's body was his favorite playground and it was hard to keep his hands to himself. Ashe smoothed his hand down Dedue's chest, over his flat, hard stomach and down to the perfect V of Dedue's hips. He'd thought to tease for a bit, but was surprised to find Dedue already hot, hard and dripping just a little. Ashe turned his face into Dedue's chest and smiled.

"That didn't take very much convincing," he teased.

Dedue laughed softly. "I never need much convincing when it comes to you." Dedue rolled over, trapping Ashe between his arms again, but this time as they kissed, he rocked their hips together, with Ashe arching his back to grind as well. Hands tussled hair, teeth nipped, hips bucked. They may not have had sex yet, but this foreplay was nothing new to either of them. At a light touch, Dedue rolled onto his back, letting Ashe climb atop him, kissing his neck until he slid down to match their hips up, eyes falling half shut as he took both members in his hand, stroking them together. The way Dedue watched him through those blown-out green eyes always drove Ashe wild. One of Dedue's hands rested on Ashe's leg, tracing comforting patterns while the other snaked up to take hold of Ashe's dick, stroking in time with Ashe's hips rocking them together. Ashe stifled a moan as he felt the need rise up in him. He wanted this, yes, but he also wanted more.

"Please, Dedue." Ashe could only imagine what he looked like, flushed with need, hair wild, dick leaking precum. "I really want to feel you inside me. Please."

Expressions warred on Dedue's face, lust coming in just behind compassion. He swallowed hard, the ball of his throat bouncing. He pushed himself up to sitting, then said: "Come here."

Ashe didn't need to be told twice. He scrambled into Dedue's lap, wrapping his arms around Dedue's shoulders and kissing his neck as Dedue slid open the drawer in the nightstand, taking out the bottle of lube. Ashe shifted and shimmied, putting himself in easy reach as he buried his face in Dedue's neck; he'd never get through this without moaning and he wanted to stifle the sound as much as possible. Dedue wrapped one arm around Ashe's waist, crushing them together, then slowly, gently, teased Ashe's puckered entrance. Ashe tried to push back, but Dedue's arm around him was like a band of iron. The last thing Dedue ever wanted was for Ashe to be hurt, and that included his own attempts to hurry this process along.

Ashe went limp, giving in to Dedue's control, whimpering softly against Dedue's skin as the first finger slid inside. Not all the way, not at first. Dedue always took it so slow, which, at first, Ashe had been enormously grateful for. Now, though, he found the pace unbearably frustrating. They were supposed to be getting him ready to take Dedue's massive cock--it wasn't going to be easy no matter how they prepared for it and no matter how big Dedue's fingers were, his cock was way thicker and longer. Still, Dedue insisted they hold off and because Ashe loved him, he agreed. Sometimes.

Though Ashe didn't have a lot of movement available to him, he could roll his hips enough to feel the slide of Dedue's finger inside of him. He moaned into Dedue's neck, feeling the digit sink deeper, give a gentle twist, a bit of a curl, then withdraw almost out before pushing in again. Ashe whimpered, wanting more and waiting on Dedue's mercy.

One finger slowly became two, and the gentle prodding became more stretching, flexing and curling. Ashe scrabbled at Dedue's back with his fingernails, whispering "Please please please" over and over, rocking back as much as he could. It felt so good! If only it could be Dedue's cock instead!

"You're taking it so good tonight," Dedue murmured, turning his head to kiss Ashe's hair. "Maybe we should consider drinks when we're ready to go for it."

"I'm ready to go for it now," Ashe panted. "Please, Dedue, don't you want to?"

"You know I do." Those soulful eyes would be Ashe's death! "But you know I couldn't bear it if you were to get hurt."

"Can't we just accept that it's going to hurt no matter how well prepared I am?" Ashe unwound one arm and reached down, giving Dedue's considerable length and girth a few quick strokes. "I promise I'll forgive you. And I know you'll stop if I--"

Ashe cut off with a sharp yelp as Dedue inserted a third finger. He buried his face in Dedue's neck in time to stifle a moan. Three fingers were still just a little much for him--the stretch, the pull, the thrust. His body had tensed at the intrusion and it took long moments to relax it again. When he did, he found that the pain in perfect conjunction with the pleasure. He drew a shaky breath before once again rocking his hips back onto Dedue's hand.

"We're not ready yet," Dedue whispered. "I don't mind taking it slow, Ashe. We can take our time."

It was so comforting to think that way. That even with all the changes coming up--the twins graduating, Cinda finding work, Cole starting college, Ashe hopefully beginning the work to earn his high school certificate--nothing between him and Dedue was changing. They were coworkers, friends, cooks and lovers and to Ashe, there was nothing better.

He could wait.

Dedue must have felt it when Ashe relaxed, because he picked up the pace of his thrusts, wringing tiny moans and whimpers out of Ashe. There was a brief pause, then a change: Dedue was only using two fingers again. Before Ashe could ask why, he felt those fingers curl and electricity shoot up his spine. He felt certain that if Dedue were not holding onto him, he would have leapt for the ceiling. He bit back a yelp by biting Dedue's shoulder, earning a sexy, deep-throated growl that excited him almost as much as the pressure against his prostate. Ashe tried to protest--he didn't want this to end too soon--but as the pressure continued with long, steady strokes, he knew he was already lost. Dedue held him even more tightly to his side as Ashe began to shiver, no longer bothering to hold his moans back. Without so much as a featherlight stroke along his length, Ashe shuddered and came, biting Dedue's shoulder once more to muffle a scream.

Overwrought and almost dazed, Ashe allowed Dedue to lay him back on the bed and clean him up with a towel kept in the same drawer as the lube. Dedue smiled softly as he brushed the hair off of Ashe's face before kissing him. Ashe heard the snap of the lube closing and the slide of the drawer and quickly shook himself awake. They couldn’t be done already!

"Dedue, you--"

"Ashe." Even in the dark, with Dedue half-turned away from him, Ashe knew what kind of face he was making. "If it's alright with you, I'd like to try something. It's a little selfish of me, and perhaps a little awkward but--"

"Anything!" Ashe agreed quickly. He had no idea what Dedue meant by selfish and awkward, but Dedue was always overly generous in bed, often putting Ashe at a loss at how to respond. Before dating Dedue, Ashe had zero experience in the bedroom, but now he figured himself fairly well-versed in the basics--everything leading up to actual sex, at least. And he trusted Dedue wholly and entirely, so whatever he wanted, Ashe was willing to give.

Still, Dedue hesitated a moment. "Could you...get up on your hands and knees?"

Ashe's breath caught. Then he scrambled into position. Was this it? Were they actually going to have sex? A quick look over his shoulder showed Dedue slicking up his cock with lube. A thrill ran down Ashe's spine, as much excitement as it was fear. He'd thought himself ready but...was he? He'd expected to at least be hard his first time, not already spent and exhausted.

Ashe shivered as Dedue moved behind him, petting his sides and pressing kisses against his back. With a gulp, he started to widen his legs and was surprised to feel Dedue sweep them back together. Before he could question it, Dedue whispered: "Just tell me if you'd like me to stop, okay?"

"Okay," Ashe agreed shakily.

Ashe heard Dedue take a deep breath, then squeaked as he felt something hot and hard push between his pressed-together thighs. Oh! He understood at once, shifting to make the space tighter, firmer, giving Dedue something to thrust against. He was rewarded by a soft moan and feel of Dedue's hips flush against his own. It was exciting and erotic and left Ashe wondering why they hadn't tried this before. It might not be sex, but the simulated position was exhilarating and judging by the way Dedue quickly picked up his pace, it was at least as good for him--hopefully even better.

A hand on Ashe's hip made him cry out in surprise, but also made him rock back, meeting Dedue's thrusts against his backside. Thick, callused fingers trailed down from Ashe's shoulder, to his side, over his hip and slid down his thigh to rest beside his knee on the bed. The rocking was rhythmic, slow, a long push in followed by a long drag out. Rather than speeding up, Dedue slowed, then stopped with a deep, groaning sigh. Before Ashe could ask what was wrong, Dedue leaned over Ashe, supporting his weight on his hands, chest flush with Ashe's back.

"Is this alright?" Dedue asked, voice whisper-soft in Ashe's ear.

"Yeah!" Ashe replied, his ears burning at his overly enthusiastic tone. "It's like having sex but without...having sex. I like it. If, um, if you like it."

Dedue's chuckle was soft and deep; Ashe could feel it through his chest. "I do. Is it alright if I finish like this?"

"Yes, please!" The last thing Ashe wanted was for Dedue to be denied his release. Usually they frotted or stroked off together, or sometimes they exchanged blow jobs. But just because Ashe had finished already didn't mean that Dedue should be left wanting; he'd do anything to help his boyfriend get off and this was excitingly erotic anyway.

Dedue sat back once again and carefully pushed between Ashe's thighs. Ashe hid an embarrassed smile against a pillow. One day he hoped to be able to take Dedue's length fully inside himself, but for now, he enjoyed getting used to the length of the strokes, the rhythm of the motion. Dedue was probably being overly cautious in insisting they be completely ready first, but Ashe didn't mind. As long as they could be together like this, Ashe decided he could wait.

Dedue's hand stayed gentle on Ashe's back and hips, even as his thrusts sped up. Ashe tried to hold still, but found himself pushed forward by the force of Dedue's hips meeting his and had to grip the bedsheets for the leverage to push back. Worse, really, was how every time Ashe had to recover his balance, his knees would brace against the bed, subtly releasing the pressure Dedue was thrusting into. As the pace increased, Ashe felt less and less in the moment and more and more forced to focus on maintaining the form to help Dedue reach his release.

One particularly violent thrust knocked Ashe forward hard enough that he took a step with his knee to catch his balance. An almost feral growl sounded from Dedue's chest and Ashe found himself very suddenly flipped on his back, one ankle gripped tight in Dedue's hand. He met Dedue's lust-darkened gaze with exhilaration and just a tiny thrill of fear.

"Ashe." Despite those fully blown eyes, the pulse ticking in Dedue's throat and the thick cock steadily weeping precum, Dedue was still wholly in control. "Can I finish like this?"

"Y-yeah," Ashe replied, breathless. He had just enough time to brace his hands against the headboard before Dedue swept both of Ashe's legs up, pulling them tight against his chest and locking them together with a thick forearm. Ashe shivered and moaned as Dedue thrust between his legs, the shiny crown of Dedue's cock drawing in and out in time with the thrusts against his pinned-together thighs.

I have no control like this, Ashe realized. It was all he could to keep from being pressed into the headboard. There wasn't a single doubt in his mind that if he asked it, Dedue would stop, but even despite not being able to control anything, Ashe wasn't worried. He wasn't in pain, not even as the pace of Dedue's thrusts kept up. In fact, being able to see Dedue's cock thrusting and withdrawing heightened to act. Ashe trembled, licked his lips and braced against the headboard, relaxing as he let Dedue take over entirely.

A hard grunt and then Dedue was spilling all over Ashe's chest and stomach, the first spurt taking Ashe just beneath his chin. Ashe cried out in surprise; he hadn't expected it to feel as hot as boiling water, but it cooled rapidly. Even more surprising than the heat was the amount: In short order, it was spilling off Ashe's slim stomach and onto the bed below. Even then, Dedue still held Ashe's legs together, resting them against a shoulder as each of them caught their breath.

Ashe's arms felt like overcooked noodles when he let them fall from the headboard. He smiled lazily up at Dedue, who still held a note of concern on his face. Ashe felt as if he could have fallen asleep right there, but a tender stroke along his thigh kept him just on the close side of awake.

"Was that alright?" Dedue asked.

"Mmhmm," Ashe hummed. Despite the heaviness of his arm, he reached up towards Dedue. "Come here. Wanna kiss you."

Dedue chuckled softly. Gently, he released Ashe's legs and set them down on the bed before moving up Ashe's side and kissing him softly. After only one or two kisses, Ashe's eyes were falling shut and his breath was coming deep and even. Sleep was an inevitability he no longer wished to fight.

The mattress shifted beneath him. "Come on, Ashe. Let's clean up."

"No." Ashe turned his face into Dedue's chest. "I'm too tired. Morning."

"Ashe." He didn't have to open his eyes to know what Dedue's tiny amused smile looked like. "You can't sleep like this. Just a quick shower, okay?"

Ashe only hummed a response through a yawn. Dedue was probably right: he was gross and he should clean up, but between all their activities and the alcohol and stress from earlier, he couldn't summon the motivation. If Dedue wanted him cleaned up, he'd have to do it himself.

Ashe squawked out a gasp as he felt himself gathered in strong arms and lifted bodily off the bed. Surprise and a surge of adrenaline driving him, he wrapped his arms around Dedue's neck and looked around. "Dedue?"

"We'll shower together," Dedue said decisively, carrying Ashe to the adjoining bathroom. "I'm not letting you fall asleep like this."

"But--" Ashe cringed as Dedue flicked the bathroom light on. As his eyes adjusted, he saw the mess Dedue was talking about for the first time and grimaced. "Fine. I guess you're right. Ugh." Dedue set him down on his feet inside the shower. Ashe made a face as he felt the viscous fluid slide down his stomach. Dedue stood outside the shower, running the water through the spout until it grew warm. Ashe squeaked when Dedue stepped over the edge of the tub, shielding Ashe's body from the cool spray of the shower head until it grew warm. Then he drew Ashe forward, kissing him as he swiped the mess away with a warm washcloth.

This was new. Yes, they'd done a lot of things together, but showering had always been separate. Ashe had thought it would be embarrassing, doing something so private and intimate with a partner, but as exhaustion had him swaying on his feet, he was grateful for Dedue's support. He smiled as he leaned into Dedue's chest, craning his neck back for a kiss.

"I think we should do this more often," Ashe murmured, half asleep again as the kiss broke.

"We could," Dedue agreed. "It is a new year, after all."

Ashe smiled. "Happy New Year, Dedue."

"Happy New Year, Ashe."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not entirely certain whether I will have the time to add more to this story or not (it was only ever supposed to be a one-shot, haha!) but if I do decide to add a new chapter, you can follow me on [Twitter](https://twitter.com/ShiroKabocha1) to see when it updates.
> 
> Thanks for reading!


	5. Valentine's Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dedue and Ashe spend their first Valentine's Day together, but with Dimitri out of town for a few days, will they finally decide to do the deed???

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dedicated to StardustCocoa, who’s suggestion made this chapter something I absolutely _had_ to write. I hope it's everything you wanted it to be!
> 
> (Side Note: Apparently this is my idea of a perfect date. I had no idea this was true until I wrote it. Anyone want to make me a baked brie? I'll bring the champagne. ^_~)

Ashe hadn't felt this nervous standing outside Dimitri's condo building since the very first time he'd visited. No, he was pretty sure he hadn't even been this nervous then. Then, he'd just been coming over for dinner, with no expectation of what followed. Now there wasn't just expectation, there was a plan.

A very carefully thought out and detailed plan.

Ashe had thought that would help him feel relaxed and prepared. Apparently, he'd been wrong. Ever since he and Dedue had decided on what their first Valentine's day would be for them, Ashe hadn't been able to look Dedue directly in the face--which made working alongside him at the club nothing short of an unmitigated disaster. Ashe had dropped an entire tray of glasses from the dishwasher just because Dedue had asked him if there were any more lemons. Lemons! That was all, no innuendo, no misunderstanding, nothing untoward, but Ashe had jumped anyway, and the entire tray of glass shattered. Dimitri had only laughed, of course, and no penalties or warnings had been given, but Ashe still felt horribly bad about it. And humiliated. Dedue had helped him clean up the mess without a word, just an aura of gentle, unending patience.

And Ashe had just about run away, finding any excuse not to have to look Dedue in the face again.

But it wasn't that he didn't want to...

He wanted to. Desperately. Every time he was in Dedue's arms, he begged for it, pleaded, negotiated, bargained...he knew this was what he wanted.

But maybe...it would have been better to let it happen organically? Rather than picking a date and time...

To lose his virginity.

Ashe swallowed hard, clutching the basket of food to his chest. It had grown heavy in his arms as he stared up at the intimidating building of homes that only the richest could afford to live in. The food should be refrigerated, he knew that. And if the bottles of champagne sweated too much, they might pop. He really should just go inside, but...he was nervous. What if he'd forgotten something? Should he have brought anything besides the food?

Did people usually bring their boyfriends flowers on Valentine's day? Maybe he should go and pick something out for Dedue. He didn't want to appear cheap or unprepared. It was an important day after all...

Ashe jumped as the door to the lobby swung open and the now-familiar doorman peered out at him.

"Were you going to come in sometime today?" the kindly old man asked with a smile. "Only, I have to run off to the restroom and I didn't want to miss it when you were finally ready to come inside."

Ashe felt his face burn a bright red. Was it that obvious that he was nervous? Did the doorman suspect...did he _know_ what Ashe and Dedue had planned to do?"

"Don't worry about it, son, everyone in a relationship gets nervous on Valentine's day," the doorman said with a smile. "Been with my wife nearly thirty years and darned if I still don't know what to get her! She says anything is fine, but she really doesn't mean that. Don't you worry, though. Your young man really will be happy with anything." The doorman winked and Ashe just about died.

"Th-th-thanks," Ashe stuttered, ducking his head as he headed for the elevator. If he ran into Felix, Sylvain or Ingrid on the way to Dimitri and Dedue's condo, he might actually, for-real faint. _That_ would certainly put a damper on his and Dedue's plans.

By some miracle, Ashe made it to Dimitri's door without any more overly embarrassing moments. He knocked once, then turned the doorknob, as both Dimitri and Dedue had asked him to do, assuring him that he was always more than welcome in their home. Ashe allowed himself a sigh of relief as he locked the door behind himself: the condo was comfortable to him by now, and the scent of food cooking and lemony cleaning products always gave him a sense of calm. But as Dedue rounded the corner from the kitchen, Ashe felt himself freeze up again.

Dedue's smile was as warm as ever, if just a little small. "Welcome, Ashe."

"I-I made it," Ashe said, laughing nervously.

"Do you need to refrigerate anything?" Dedue asked, pointing at the basket without coming any closer. "You're welcome to whatever you need in the kitchen. I'm still setting things up in the living room."

"O-okay." Ashe waited until Dedue has crossed the hallway into the other room before scurrying into the kitchen, putting his fruits and champagne away to chill and leaving the dry goods on the kitchen counter. Dimitri's kitchen was state-of-the-art and possessed appliances usually only available in a commercial restaurant; it was one of Ashe's favorite rooms in the house. He took a moment to appreciate the cupcakes Dedue had set on the counter and even took a peek at the delicious something baking in the oven. An expensive-looking fondue set sat in the middle of the kitchen island and Ashe practically salivated. It had been years since he'd had good fondue; if he could get over his nerves, this was likely about to be the very best date in his entire life.

"Ashe." Ashe jumped at the sound of his own name. Dedue stood in the doorway on the kitchen, not blocking it, exactly, but he was so big that he gave that impression anyway. "Could we have a moment to talk?"

"Y-yeah. Of course." Ashe backed up until the comforting heat of the oven was at his back. He tried a smile, even though his stomach flipped like he was about to be sick. "Is this about dinner, or about, um..."

Dedue gave Ashe a look of loving patience. "You know we don't have to. It's never an expectation. If it would make you calm down and feel more comfortable, I'd rather we take it off the table entirely."

"But, but I..." Ashe felt his ears go hot. He had to stare at the floor to keep from welling up with tears. "I really do want to, I just...just..."

Out of the corner of his eye, Ashe saw Dedue shrug. "I'm nervous, too, Ashe. Just because we talked about it doesn't mean that we have to. And if you're tense and nervous about it, neither one of us is going to enjoy it anyway. I'd really like it if we could just watch some cooking competitions together as usual and maybe share the baked brie I have in the oven."

"Baked brie?" Sufficiently distracted, Ashe spun around to peek into the oven again. "Inside a puff pastry?"

"With raspberry jam," Dedue confirmed.

"I guess I'm not going anywhere until that's done cooking!" Ashe said with a laugh. He ruffled his hair, embarrassed. "I'm sorry, Dedue. I didn't mean to make this so weird, I just--"

Dedue held out a hand to Ashe, a smile crinkling his eyes. "Please don't think anything of it, Ashe. Come to the living room with me."

Ashe took Dedue's hand and followed him out to where the picnic set-up of his dreams awaited. Dedue had moved all the furniture to the walls and spread out a red-and-white checkered blanket on the floor, each corner anchored with glass jars of candles already melting down. Champagne chilled in a bucket of ice in the center of the blanket right next to a small, wrapped bouquet of violets.

Ashe nearly cried.

"Ashe?" Dedue asked in alarm as Ashe stifled a sob. "Did I do something wrong?"

"No, no, I just--I just--" Ashe shook his head, tugged his hand free from Dedue's, then grabbed the collar of Dedue's shirt, hauling him down for a long, wet kiss. Ashe sniffled a little, but he couldn't bring himself to care as Dedue's arms wrapped around him and tugged him close. Ashe had the best boyfriend in the world. Bar none.

When the kiss finally broke, Ashe swiped at his eyes with his sleeve. "Who gave you the right to be so perfect?"

Dedue still looked mildly confused by Ashe's violently shifting emotions, which Ashe couldn't blame him for at all. "I just wanted everything to be special for us today. This isn't meant to make you feel pressured at all."

"No, I know that." Ashe smiled through tears. He grabbed Dedue's hand, unable to keep his hands off his lover. "It is special. Everything about this is special. Especially you."

Dedue blushed faintly. He made a suggestion about starting something on the TV for them to watch and Ashe settled down on a pillow after a few deep, cleansing breaths. Why had he ever been nervous at all? Of course just because they'd talked about this being the day they finally had sex didn't mean they absolutely **HAD** to have sex. He should have known Dedue would have been more than accommodating in that regard.

But... Ashe still hoped sex wasn't off the table entirely. Because he still did want to.

"So Dimitri's out of town for the next few days?" Ashe asked as a cooking competition show began on the television. Dedue settled down on the checkered blanket, resting on an elbow so he could face Ashe.

"London, and then Edinburgh. Ingrid is running the club while he's away."

"It must be amazing to travel as much as he does," Ashe said wistfully, propping a pillow under his head so he could see the TV. "I'd love to travel."

"He complains about it a lot," Dedue admitted. "Even traveling first class, he says the seats are too small."

"Yeah, well, Dimitri's really tall so--" Ashe snapped his mouth shut as he looked over at Dedue. "Sorry. Travel must be tough on you, too."

"I don't mind it on occasion," Dedue said, smiling slightly. "But if I had a choice, I think I'd rather take a cruise."

"Mmm, that does sound nice." Ashe sidled sideways, pressing up against Dedue. They probably would have talked more, but the show as starting and neither of them wanted to miss it. After the judge described the rules and limitations of the first challenge, they casually discussed what each of them would make and why, and how they would make it original enough to win the competition. Ashe kept listening hopefully for the timer in the kitchen; cooking shows always made him woefully hungry.

"Are you going to pop that bottle soon?" Ashe asked, pointing to the champagne.

Dedue considered for a moment, then said: "I was thinking perhaps we might forego alcohol. It's always had a bit of an...amorous effect on the both of us before."

Ashe laughed. "I hope we do get amorous. It is Valentine's day, after all."

"Ashe." Dedue's emerald green eyes were guarded. "Are you sure?"

Ashe leaned forward to catch Dedue's lips in a kiss. "Yes. I'm sure."

Reassured, Dedue sat up and popped the cork in the champagne, Ashe hiding a grin as he watched the flex on Dedue's biceps. He'd worried (and it had been a very small worry) that Dedue might lose muscle definition by switching from the club's bouncer to its second bartender, but Dedue hadn't given up his workout routine. Ashe was fairly certain those muscles were the reason Dedue outpaced him in tips every night, but it was hard to hold a grudge over that: Dedue usually only used his tips to buy them both dinner once or twice a week, anyway.

They toasted their champagne flutes, each smiling shyly, then settled in to watch the rest of the episode--Which was precisely when the timer from the kitchen went off. Dedue set his champagne down and carefully climbed to his feet.

"Can I help?" Ashe asked.

"If you don't mind," Dedue replied. He never denied Ashe an opportunity to work in the kitchen. "I thought we could eat the brie with some apple slices and crackers."

"I can cut apples!" Ashe was careful to step around the champagne flutes and followed Dedue to the kitchen. The bake brie smelled divine--like warm bread, melty cheese and just a hint of sweetness from the jam. Ashe washed and cut apples while Dedue made a plate of crackers, grapes, and candied nuts. Together, they walked their snacks back to the living room, getting back just in time to see which contestants won the cooking challenge.

When Dedue cut into the crust of the puff pastry, brie oozed out like a lava flow, carrying the raspberry preserves along with it. Unable to wait, Ashe grabbed a slice of apple and scooped up a good-sized dollop of it. The heavy, salty flavor of the cheese was perfectly balanced with the citrus and sweetness of the fruit. He closed his eyes, reveling in the flavor, savoring it--and yeah, maybe getting just a little turned on by it. Damn, but Dedue could cook!

Ashe blinked his eyes open, embarrassed to find Dedue watching him closely. "So it's alright then?"

Ashe laughed. He swatted Dedue's hand away as he reached for his own helping. Ashe used a cracker this time, layering it carefully with brie and preserves before holding it up to Dedue's mouth. "Say 'Ah.'"

Cheeks faintly tinged with red, Dedue opened his mouth and allowed Ashe to feed him. He hummed appreciatively, chewing slowly before he swallowed. "I really should try making my own preserves. The jam could have been sweeter."

"Oh, stop." Ashe punched him lightly in the shoulder. "This is perfect. Just like everything else about today so far."

The cooking competition played on in the background as Ashe and Dedue continued feeding each other pieces of fruit and crackers layered with brie and jam. Ashe ducked out briefly, returning to the picnic blanket with a small container of rare goat cheese he'd found while out shopping and both of them enjoyed pairing the sour flavor of the goat cheese with the melty goodness of the brie and the sweet flavors of the fruit. By the time the brie cooled enough so as to no longer be easily scooped onto crackers, Dedue cut the pastry into pieces and they ate it with their hands, holding up small bites for each other to try, thumbs brushing crumbs from the corners of lips, eyes laughing, hands brushing. At some point, they finished the first bottle of champagne and Ashe got one of the ones he had brought. It was sweeter than the first one, and a little less fizzy. It cut through the sharp flavors of cheese on Ashe's palate and made his stomach warm and fluttery, his every nerve ending singing beneath his skin. Feeling brave, Ashe lured Dedue close with a bite of brie and pastry, then tossed it away in favor of pressing his lips against Dedue's.

They had already been reclining on the floor, propped up on pillows and elbows, barely watching the show as they traded treats back and forth. Now Dedue swept over Ashe, putting him flat on his back as he leaned over him, boxing him in with his elbows. Ashe wrapped his arms around Dedue's shoulders, pulling the tie free of his hair and knotting his fingers through it. Ashe gasped and moaned as Dedue's mouth followed the line of his jaw back to the sensitive skin beneath his ear. His hips bucked sharply as teeth gently grazed his shoulder. Ashe's fingernails dug hard crescents into Dedue's skin as he tried pulling him closer, closer. He clawed Dedue's shirt off and pulled their bodies flush, kissing every inch of skin he could reach but it still wasn't enough.

The world could fall away, leaving only the two of them on that checkered picnic blanket and they still wouldn't be close enough.

"Dedue!" Ashe said urgently. "Dedue, wait. Please, I--I want--I want--Ah!"

Cool air on wet skin made Ashe cry out. His vision was hazy, either from lust or champagne or both, but he was still able to make out those beautiful green eyes looking down at him.

"This is fine, Ashe," Dedue insisted. "I don't need anything you're not willing to give."

"I am! I do!" Ashe gripped Dedue's upper arms with a desperation he didn't know he possessed. "I want it. I want you! Please, Dedue, say we can."

Dedue looked doubtful. He cast a glance over at their empty champagne glasses. Ashe knew that look, knew the gentle rejection that was coming.

"Dedue, listen," Ashe said, holding a hand over Dedue's mouth to keep him from objecting. "I know I was nervous before. I was overthinking things and that's my fault. But even when I was nervous, I still wanted this with you. Today, now, while everything is perfect. I'm not drunk, I swear, I'm just comfortable and happy and in love and I really want to, Dedue. So...please?"

Though he knew it was way below the belt, Ashe ducked his chin and looked up through the fringe of hair in his eyes: a puppy-dog stare he'd seen on each of his sibling's faces whenever they really wanted something. It had taken him years to harden to that look and as far as Ashe had seen, Dedue was helpless whenever one of the twins fixed him with that look. It looked like it might fail this time, though, as Dedue drew back with a tiny shake of his head, but then Ashe went for the kill: the tiny, hopeful inner-lip-bite coupled with the softly furrowed brow.

Dedue heaved a sigh and looked away. "It's really unfair that you're doing that."

"Is it working?" Ashe asked, ever hopeful.

Dedue sighed and Ashe knew he'd won. "Yes. But only if you'll agree to certain conditions."

"Anything!" Ashe swore, his nerves and excitement all coming back at once.

"You're not going to complain about how long I take making sure you're ready."

"Okay." Preparation was key, anyway, although Ashe felt Dedue sometimes did go overboard.

"You'll tell me if it hurts too much and we'll stop."

"Okay." As if Ashe was going to tell Dedue to stop once they finally started--

"And if I think I'm hurting you, I'm going to stop."

Ashe tried to protest, but Dedue's jaw was firm and set: Arguing would be pointless. Still, though... "But it's going to hurt a little. I've done some research on my own and...I mean, no matter what, there's going to be some pain."

"Some," Dedue allowed, though he looked uncomfortable to admit it. "But I'm too afraid of you not telling me honestly if it hurts too much or not, so I'll make a judgment to keep from hurting you. Do you understand?"

Ashe sighed, giving up. "Fine. But now you've gone and made me think about it, so I'm nervous again."

"That's okay," Dedue said, sitting up so he was no longer hovering over Ashe. "We don't have to--"

"I'm getting another bottle of champagne," Ashe decided, pushing himself up and flipping his hair out of his eyes. "And the next time we get all steamy, don't stop to lay out the ground rules. I think it'll work best for me if we just move into it naturally."

Dedue considered, then nodded. He took some time tidying up the picnic blanket as Ashe got the bottle of champagne and the box of chocolates he'd picked up. No cheap heart-shaped box of Valentine's day candy for his man: These were artisanal truffles that Ashe had saved his tips for over a month to buy. He sat down right by Dedue's side and popped one into Dedue's mouth, smiling brightly as he did so.

Dedue's eyes widened with surprise while Ashe laughed at his expression. "Are these...alcoholic?"

"Yep!" Ashe showed him the box. "Whiskey, bourbon and scotch chocolates! Perfect for a couple of bartenders, don't you think?"

Dedue laughed and tugged Ashe into his lap. He took a chocolate from the box and fed it to Ashe, smiling warmly as he watched him eat it. When the chocolates were finished, Dedue popped the champagne but Ashe didn't want to leave the circle of Dedue's arms, so they took sips directly from the bottle, sharing kisses in between. Neither of them rushed it. They spent long moments in silence, fingers twined together as they watched the ending of an episode. They must have been eating and making out for quite some time; Ashe wasn't certain when his favorite contestant had been cut from the competition.

When they slowly started up again, it was Dedue's fault. He leaned low over Ashe, eyes closed, long hair dangling as he pressed a gentle kiss to Ashe's lips. Ashe felt a flutter of nerves in his stomach, but tamped them down as he kissed back, weaving his fingers through Dedue's hair, tasting sweet and sour flavors on Dedue's tongue. The champagne bottle got pushed away in favor of Dedue pulling off Ashe's shirt and rolling onto his back, making Ashe lie on top of him for skin-to-skin contact and continued kissing. Ashe kissed down the column of Dedue's neck, sliding back down Dedue's glorious body, teasing ticklish zones beneath Dedue's arms and along his ribs, making the bigger man squirm and scowl playfully. When he inched down enough, Ashe fit their hips against one another and rocked, gently yet firmly, still kissing Dedue's chest, wrapped in Dedue's arms.

"Dedue," Ashe whispered after long moments. "Please?"

A pause, then Dedue rolled onto his side, holding Ashe against him so he didn't fall. Instead of asking if Ashe was sure again, Dedue held his eyes for a long moment, as if looking for something, then nodded. Together they climbed to their feet and--ever diligent--Dedue blew out the candles anchoring the corners of the blanket. Almost as an afterthought, Ashe turned off the TV; he'd completely lost track of the cooking competition and would likely have to rewatch the season from the beginning, but he couldn't bring himself to care about that.

Even though Dedue had said at the beginning that they didn't need to do anything, he'd likely surmised beforehand that they'd end up in bed at some point, because the sheets were turned down and violet petals had been scattered along the floor. There was even a scented candle burning in a corner for light, something that smelled like lavender and vanilla with a hint of citrus. Ashe felt another flutter in his stomach, but this time he wasn't entirely certain it was all nerves--he was pretty sure it was part anticipation as well. He felt Dedue step up behind him, stooping low to kiss his shoulder and wrap his arms around him. Ashe moaned, hands going to his pants only to have them pushed gently away. Dedue popped the button on his jeans, slid the zipper down and--after only a slight hesitation, pushed Ashe's pants down his hips.

Ashe turned in Dedue's arms, one arm looped around the back of Dedue's neck to pull him down for a kiss--and also for balance as he shoved his pants the rest of the way down. Once free, he walked backwards to the bed, tugging Dedue along with him until the bed hit the backs of his knees. Sitting in front of Dedue, Ashe leaned forward to press a kiss on the delicious six-pack, then leaned back to take in one of his favorite sights.

Why it was so erotic to see Dedue's need straining against a column of buttons, Ashe couldn't say, but it was. In fact, when he was by himself at night--long after the twins had fallen silent and asleep--most of his fantasies started with the familiar image of this bulge and the five metal buttons it took to free it. And that wasn't mentioning the fine trail of wispy white hairs leading down from Dedue's naval, or the hollows of Dedue's hips. Ashe caught his breath, then looked up the plane of Dedue's body, smiling playfully. Before Dedue could say anything, Ashe leaned forward, catching the corner of Dedue's jeans in his teeth, then--without breaking eye contact--jerked his chin and pulled back, popping three of the five buttons all at once.

"Fuck!" Dedue looked instantly embarrassed at the outburst, cheeks coloring as his hand rose to cover his mouth. Ashe felt his toes curl, a delighted smile every bit as wicked as one of the twin’s on his mouth. He loved those seconds when he shattered Dedue's cool exterior; it felt like eating a chocolate-covered pretzel--silky sweetness coating a solid, salty core: a dichotomy of flavors that shouldn't work well together but did so in perfect harmony anyway.

Ashe took his time undoing the last two buttons--with his hands this time--just teasing the straining length behind them with "accidental" touches, leaning close enough to see Dedue shiver by the heat of his breath. He slipped both hands inside Dedue's waistband, sliding them towards the back to give Dedue's steel ass a squeeze before pushing his jeans down just enough to clear the boxer-briefs he worse underneath. Ashe leaned forward again, kissing along the top of the elastic band before tipping his head sideways and teasing Dedue's length with his mouth over his underwear. He heard Dedue's shivery breath above him, felt a hand gently rest on the top of his head, as he kept up the light teasing.

With the way things usually went between them, this was the only time Ashe really had any control. Because once Dedue got into the bed and they were both naked, he took over the pace and rhythm of their love-making. Not that Ashe minded at all--he often got caught up in the heat of it all and never had any complaints afterwards. But sometimes he felt a little bad, making Dedue do all the work. So he'd worked out that in the moments leading up to the actual bedding, he could remain in control just long enough to make sure he gave a little back to Dedue.

Although, in all fairness, he was taking a bit longer than he usually did. Ashe began tonguing the tip of Dedue's cock through his underwear, marking the cotton with a wet spot and enjoying the helpless little thrusts of Dedue's hips. Finally a groan broke through Dedue's patience and a tiny plea that sounded like "Ashe?" broke through his playfulness. Ashe looked up and as he broke contact, he felt the fingers in his hair firm and tip his head back, Dedue leaning over him and down as he pressed Ashe into the mattress. Arms slipped between Ashe's body and the bed, lifting him and shifting him back so Dedue could climb over him, elbows and knees resting on the bed as they continued kissing, hips rocking against each other, breath coming fast, hearts beating hard.

Dedue pulled away first, standing up to hurriedly kick off his pants and boxer-briefs. Ashe skinned out of his underwear quickly, arching his back off the bed to do so. They were only apart for mere seconds, but both were reaching for each other desperately as they came back together, a warm blend of soft skin, wet lips, and hard need. Ashe yelped when their erections came into contact, the delicate skin lit by a fire-like heat, then he shivered as Dedue's breath rippled through his hair and down his back. He pressed every inch of available skin up against Dedue. It still wasn't enough. He still wanted more.

Ashe nearly laughed to himself; only months ago, he'd thought it selfish to want anything for himself. He had his brother and sister to take care of, after all. But now, he couldn't imagine a life without Dedue, a life without this little bit of selfishness. He'd fight if he was told to give it up. There wasn't a thing in the world that he wanted more than these stolen moments with the man he loved.

Well, except maybe a thing the man he loved could give him...

Amidst the groping, kissing, grinding and fondling, Dedue managed to move them both up towards the pillows and the headboard, settling back as he drew Ashe into his lap. Without breaking a highly suggestive kiss, Dedue slipped his hand inside the drawer of his nightstand, rummaging around until he found a brand-new bottle of lube. Ashe would not have been surprised in the least to find that Dedue had done some independent research on best lube brands before picking out The One for their first time. The thought was almost enough to make him chuckle, but as Dedue's eyes grew serious, as found himself swallowing his humor. He traced the curve of Dedue's ear with his fingers and surged up for a kiss, trying for a nonverbal cue that he was still okay with what they had planned.

Dedue wrapped one arm around Ashe's waist, locking their chests together but splitting Ashe's legs apart over a thickly muscled thigh. Ashe rested his head against the curve of Dedue's shoulder, fingers playing in Dedue's hair as he took slow breaths and reminded himself to relax. Dedue would stop if he didn't think Ashe was ready and he was--really! His mind and his heart were completely on board--it was only his body that was a tiny bit hesitant, but the only thing that was going to solve that was just to do it. So Ashe focused on breathing, focused on staying loose and receptive, focused on his trust that Dedue would never willingly hurt him. It helped.

A little.

Ashe shivered as fingers cool and slick with lube eased between his cheeks and rubbed against that sensitive ring of muscle. This was neither new, nor scary. This was something they'd done many times before. Dedue liked bringing Ashe off with a prostate massage and Ashe certainly didn't have any cause to complain. They'd even used toys before, things bigger than Dedue's fingers, although nothing seemed to come close to Dedue in length and girth. Still, Ashe had learned the key to relaxing was to keep breathing and he focused on that now as the first finger slipped inside him.

His first instinct was to press back, to rush the feeling of being filled, but with Dedue holding him around his waist so firmly, Ashe wasn't able to do more than roll his hips. He moaned into Dedue's neck, hands tracing the muscles of Dedue's back, while he continued to focus on breathing. And patience. Sometimes Dedue moved through the preparation process more quickly, other times he was slow and methodical. Ashe was pretty sure he could guess which one it was going to be today.

Still, wasn't there really only so much a single finger could do on its own? Just because they had two full days to spend together didn't mean they should spend the whole two days just getting ready to have sex.

"Dedue," Ashe whispered. "You know I can take more than that."

"I know." The finger inside him curled and Ashe gasped. As his body tried to push back on it for more, it drew away. "But you agreed not to complain about me taking my time with this."

"I'm not complaining, I'm just asking for more," Ashe insisted. "Please, Dedue?"

Dedue sighed, the filling and emptying of his chest making Ashe rise and fall with it. "I love you, Ashe. The last thing I want is for this to be an unpleasant experience for you."

"I know and I love you, too." Ashe turned his head enough to place a kiss on Dedue's cheek. "But even if it does turn out to be unpleasant--which I don't think it will--it's not going to break me and it's not going to break us. So, please?"

The hand wrapped around Ashe's waist stroked his side comfortingly and the finger inside him withdrew entirely. Ashe craned his neck to see that Dedue was one-handedly adding more lube. "You are taking it very well. Still, I'm going to take my time making sure you're ready first. Are you okay with using one of the toys before taking me?"

Ashe wanted to say no, if only to hurry it along, but he agreed with only a touch of exasperation. He relaxed over Dedue's shoulder again, breath hitching only slightly when two fingers eased inside him, thrusting slowly at first before stretching and pulling, massaging his walls and lightly teasing his prostate. While Ashe knew Dedue had to be avoiding that spot on purpose to make it all last longer, it was still frustrating--being kept on the edge like this for too long was going to lead to a disappointingly quick orgasm later. But it couldn't be easy on Dedue, either. At least Ashe was getting some stimulation while they worked through the prep--Dedue must be dying without any contact.

With that thought in mind, Ashe untwined his arm from around Dedue's shoulders and reached down between them, grasping the hot and heavy firmness of Dedue's erection. He felt Dedue's breath catch and just the tiniest bit of a shiver before Dedue asked: "What are you doing?"

"Helping," Ashe said coyly. "Don't worry, I'll be gentle."

Dedue huffed a soft laugh, then added a third finger. Ashe keened softly, stroking Dedue's length in time with the Dedue's movements inside him. After long, silent minutes, Dedue stopped for more lube and Ashe held his hand out for some as well, using it to ease the slide of his hand along Dedue's length. Quite innocently, Ashe figured out that if he gradually increased the speed of his strokes, Dedue would unconsciously increase his pace to match. Ashe tried to keep himself quiet, but before long he was groaning and grinding back, the motion of his hand gone sloppy with need. And of course, that was when Dedue stopped.

"Wuh--what?" Ashe asked, gasping.

"You're taking it so well today," Dedue said, placing a kiss on Ashe's hair. "I think you're ready to take the toy."

"Yeah," Ashe agreed breathily. "Um, how--"

"Turn over."

Ashe flipped over onto his stomach obediently fast, his chest and stomach pressed over Dedue's lap, his knees and elbows holding his weight on either side. While Dedue fumbled with something in the drawer, Ashe sat back on his knees and twisted just enough to wrap his fingers around the base of Dedue's cock and pull it closer to his face. Dedue shuddered and gasped, dropping whatever it was in his hand as Ashe took his cock in his mouth, swiping the crown with his tongue and hollowing his cheeks out with suction. Dedue let it continue for long, long moments, head resting back on the pillows, until a violent shiver wracked his body. Blinking his eyes back into focus, Dedue reached into the drawer again and this time drew out the object he'd been looking for: a wide, purple dildo, one they'd used before. It wasn't as big around as Dedue, or as long, but it was bigger than Dedue's fingers and certainly stretched Ashe further.

"Are you ready for this?" Dedue asked, panting very slightly as Ashe stopped sucking long enough to stare at the dildo.

Ashe nodded mutely. He settled over Dedue's lap again, taking deep breaths and widening his legs just a bit. He felt Dedue's warm hand settle in the middle of his back, gently, comfortingly, as the cold, blunt tip of the dildo pressed against his entrance. Everything tightened by instinct--more by the cold than anything else--then with an indrawn breath, Ashe relaxed. He felt it press slowly yet insistently through the loosened ring of muscle. Instead of pushing it through to its full length, Dedue worked it around using only the first few inches, getting Ashe used to the feeling of short, shallow thrusts. As the feeling became more familiar, less foreign, Ashe felt his body relax more and slowly Dedue added to the depth.

It wasn't long before Ashe was rocking back against the dildo, moaning for more and trying to grind off against Dedue's thigh without little to no success. He felt Dedue's dick hot and thick against his side, felt the rough tug of Dedue's fingers in his hair, the short, uncontrolled hip thrusts that unexpectedly lifted and dropped him, making the dildo move in unpredictable ways. Ashe's back arched, his toes curled, his hands fisted in the sheets. It was good, it was so good, but it still wasn't enough.

He cried out in loss as the dildo was pulled free and tossed recklessly to the side. Ashe was turning to look over his shoulder, about to ask why, when Dedue rolled him onto his back, covering his body with his own, kisses hard and needy pressed against his mouth. He screamed helplessly into the kiss as his length met Dedue's in a burst of hard thrusts he couldn't have controlled if he'd wanted to. Dedue had to lift himself up on his elbows to put space between them for Ashe to recover his breath and his control.

Ashe blinked up at Dedue, peering down at him with both concern and love. Ashe smiled weakly.

"Am I ready, Dedue?"

Dedue shifted. Brushed hair out of Ashe's eyes. Smiled. "If you still want to."

"Yes," Ashe breathed. Dedue moved to lift him and Ashe helped by wrapping his arms around Dedue's shoulders. Somehow they'd ended up lying cross-wise along the bed rather than along the length of it. It didn't matter to Ashe, who was shorter than the bed was wide, but it made a difference to Dedue. Once settled, Dedue reached into his nightstand one last time and withdrew a foil square from the little black and gold box that had been inside the drawer ever since they’d started dating. Ashe swallowed as Dedue meticulously tore off the end, pulled out the little round rubber and rolled it down the seemingly endless length of his dick.

Oh shit, that's going inside me, Ashe thought in sudden panic, as if it was suddenly new information.

"Ashe."

It was a struggle to tear his eyes away from the massive, latex-wrapped monstrosity, but when Ashe looked up he found Dedue watching him carefully. He tried for a smile, but knew it must look weak. Still, he was grateful when Dedue pushed forward. He took Ashe's hand and squeezed a dollop of lube into it before placing it on his cock, guiding Ashe's hand through the process of slicking it. Fuck, how did it manage to feel even longer than it looked??

"There are a few ways we can do this," Dedue said, voice soft. "I want you to have as much control over this as possible so you can stop if you need to. And I think the best way for that--"

"I want to be on top." Ashe's voice came out thin, strangled. But he'd done his own research and had come to that conclusion on his own. "It's...I want to be able to see you. When we're..." He trailed off, blushing fiercely, although he couldn't say exactly why.

At least Dedue was blushing, too. He nodded, the ball of his throat bobbing sharply as he swallowed. "I can help with that. With keeping you from going too fast."

Ashe nodded, mouth suddenly dry. He wasn't sure where these nerves were coming from; he wanted this. Dedue wanted this. They were finally doing this!

Dedue leaned back against the pillows, shoulders slightly propped up but otherwise lying flat. Ashe trembled slightly as he swung a leg over Dedue's hips, s shivery gasp escaping his lips as he grazed Dedue's cock. For a moment, he felt a little lost, like he wasn't sure what to do next, then Dedue reached up, cupped the back of Ashe's head and pulled him down for a kiss. Ashe felt his body melt almost instantly. Dedue's hands on his skin and in his hair were familiar and warm, the kiss was loving and tender. They'd done all this before; nothing was too new or too scary. This was Dedue, after all.

Ashe didn't rush himself. He waited until the kisses had him feeling soothed, the gently stroking hands on his sides made him feel relaxed. The he pushed himself up to sitting once more and inched back down Dedue's body. Dedue opened his mouth to speak--but whether it was caution or support or assurance--Ashe didn't want to be taken out of the moment, didn't want to overthink, so he placed a finger over Dedue's lips. Dedue looked concerned, but nodded and remained silent.

Ashe reached behind himself, expecting a flutter of nerves as he grasped Dedue's length, but instead he found himself smiling. This really wasn't all that new; he'd held Dedue's length before, stroked it, kissed it. The weight and heat were familiar, comforting even. He leaned back, angling back until he felt the blunt tip of it pressed against his entrance. Facing Dedue as he was, he couldn't miss the little flicker of anticipation in Dedue's eyes, which made him smile. Ashe eased back until he felt the barest amount of pressure. Dedue had prepared him well and the slick, latex-clad erection moved easily against him. Still, he knew he if tried to move too quickly, he'd not only hurt himself, but Dedue would make them stop. So he paused for a breath, a reassuring smile, then slowly exhaled while he seated himself back.

A long groan from Dedue's throat, deep and needy as if he couldn't help himself. Ashe felt all the muscles coiled beneath him tense and jutter--not quite a thrust, though the effect was the same. Ashe gasped, eyes bulging as an extra inch moved into him quicker than anticipated. He went still for a moment, took a breath, then slowly continued. The pain was there despite all the preparation beforehand, but he'd known to expect that. Nothing had stretched him quite the way Dedue's cock was stretching him. And the length--it seemed to go on forever! Ashe took a moment to catch his breath, leaning heavily on Dedue's chest, head down as he reminded himself to breathe and stay relaxed.

Dedue's hands covered Ashe's, sliding up his arms, tucking hair behind his ears. Ever since that initial coiling of muscle, Dedue had held completely still--an enormously impressive task that Ashe found admirable. He wasn’t certain he could have done the same had their positions been reversed. He looked up towards Dedue, relieved to find him smiling.

"You're perfect, Ashe," Dedue told him, a slightly breathless quality in his words. "This is perfect."

Something twisted in Ashe's chest, making him want to cry, to sing, to hold Dedue and never let him go. Ashe wasn't the one who was perfect--that title belonged to Dedue.

Ashe chuckled as he swiped away a tear from the corner of his eye. "Stop distracting me, Dedue. This is harder than it looks."

"I love you, Ashe."

A laugh like a sob. "I love you too, Dedue."

Feeling refreshed, Ashe took a breath, closed his eyes and sank back another inch. Another. And--Oh! Pain made him stop, retreat a little. Deep breaths to get him past the worst of it, then he was sinking again, slow and controlled, reminding himself that this was the worst of it. After, it would be better. After, he'd finally finally feel like they were close enough to one another.

It actually came as a shock when Ashe found himself fully seated in Dedue's lap, ass against Dedue's hips, knees beneath him supporting his weight, hands braced on Dedue's iron stomach. He was panting with sweat dripping from his hair, along his shoulders and down his back. There wasn't as much pain as he'd expected--though there certainly was some--but it was more the uncomfortable feeling of pressure somewhere he wasn't used to feeling it. He curled forward, leaning low over his hands, then arched his back, stretching backwards. He shifted left, right, trying to find the right angle, the perfect fit.

"Ashe, please." The tiny, pleading voice stopped Ashe entirely. Dedue's head was turned to the side, his eyes shut as if he were in pain. "I can't--if you keep moving like that, I--I won't be able to hold back."

"I'm sorry." Ashe froze, ignoring his discomfort in favor of Dedue's. "Am I doing it wrong? I'm not hurting you, am I?"

Dedue huffed a tight laugh, his body moving just enough that Ashe had to clamp down on a sharp cry. "You're worried...about me?"

"I'm always worried about you." If he could reach, Ashe would have brushed the loose strands of hair out of Dedue's eyes. Instead, he reached for Dedue's hand, surprised to find it knotted in the sheets. "This should be good for both of us."

"So good." A shiver wracked Dedue's body, making Ashe squeak. "Ashe, I--you have to decide what happens next."

Ashe frowned. "What do you mean?"

"Either you need to get off and we'll stop, or--" Dedue's eyes were fever bright, giving Ashe the sense of iron-tight control. "Or I need you to start moving."

"Oh!" Ashe hadn't realized how difficult it had to be for Dedue to keep from thrusting, from taking control and just taking over the rhythm and pace. To keep from hurting Ashe. He'd been so focused on not hurting himself, he'd forgotten the agony Dedue had to be in. He lifted himself on his knees, incrementally, breathing in with a sigh that felt like relief, then dropped back down. Dedue's hips surged beneath him like a caged animal, surprising a shout out of Ashe. Their eyes met, both in a panic covering hard lust. Ashe swallowed and nodded he was okay and Dedue's eyes fell half-lidded once more. Ashe shifted forward again, rising a little higher on his knees this time before sinking back down with a sigh. At some point, Dedue's hands had found their way to resting on Ashe's hips, but they didn't add any pressure or speed to his motions, they just added warmth and comfort. Ashe covered one of Dedue's hands with one of his own, smiled, then repeated the motion again.

He wasn't moving all that much, wasn't thrusting all that deep or all that quickly, but he set a pace in time with his breathing, each motion its own release, its own reward. The more comfortable the motions became, the less they hurt and it wasn't long before Ashe forgot to think about his movements and simply let his body take over. The first time he sat back and rocked against Dedue's hips, they cried out at the same time, neither in pain, all in pleasure. He was only distantly aware that Dedue had begun moving as well, rolling his hips and surging up against Ashe's rhythm, adding a pleasant undercurrent, like a pop of citrus in a seafood dish. Ashe stopped thinking about sex and let it happen.

And it was amazing.

The feeling of Dedue filling him over and over made him look forward to every inch, each withdrawal made him hungry for more. His motions were speeding up, his body arched and shifting, seeking new angles, new positions. Dedue's hands were firm guides along his hips, keeping him from rising too high or going too fast. His hips ground down, back arching sharply, then--

An instant that stretched out into infinity as Ashe puzzled out that scream was coming from his own throat. His head tossed back, eyes half-shut as his world narrowed to a pin-point of pleasure. Everything else fell away. All he wanted was that sensation back, but he didn't know how he'd gotten it, wasn't sure how to repeat it, but then Dedue was there, hips and hands guiding Ashe onto that spot over and over again. Ashe clung weakly to Dedue's forearms, riding out torrents of sensation, lost to everything but the feeling. He felt like he should say something, but words lost all meaning. His eyes pricked with tears, his heart was full to bursting, sweat ran down his back in rivers. In a final moment of near-coherency, he locked eyes with Dedue and saw everything he was feeling reflected back at him--

And then it was over. Ashe's body convulsed violently around their point of intimate contact, his orgasm taking him hard enough to expel the air from his lungs, the strength of his legs, the sight from his eyes. If there was one thing Ashe regretted, it was losing that moment as he hovered somewhere between wakefulness and unconsciousness. By the time he recovered, the moment had already passed. Dedue was holding him up, quiet concern in his eyes, as Ashe felt him grow soft inside him. Ashe's passion streaked Dedue's chest and pooled between them at their hips, although some of that might have been Dedue's as well. Ashe tried to draw himself up and whimpered, the pain that had been ignored during their joining coming back at him all at once.

"Ashe." Dedue steadied him with one hand in the small of his back, the other reaching between them to pinch the base of the condom. "You're okay. Just help me out and move, okay?"

"Okay." The room spun in lazy circle as Ashe pushed himself up and off of Dedue, leaning heavily on Dedue's arm for support. Dedue saw him laid in the bed before he rolled to the side, peeled off he condom and swiped the mess off his body with a towel from the nightstand. In less than a minute, Dedue was back in the bed, lying beside Ashe, large hand cupping Ashe's face.

"Are you alright?" Dedue asked, skin still flush from their passion.

Ashe smiled and tried reaching out for Dedue, but even that small motion made him wince in pain. Why did it hurt so much more now, when he was empty, than before, when he was full to the brim? It didn't make much sense, but Ashe had found little enough did when one was in love.

"It hurts a little now," Ashe admitted, knowing Dedue would appreciate the honesty. "But I loved it. Every minute of it. I swear, Dedue."

Dedue's smile was like the sun. "I did, too. I'm sorry it hurts, Ashe."

"I don't mind," Ashe said sincerely. He still felt slick and stretched and part of him wanted to get up and take a bath while another part of him wisely warned against any attempt to move. Even just adjusting his position on the bed made him wince. Luckily, Dedue seemed to understand and helped him get a pillow under his head without moving him too much. Then he curled in close, one arm resting lightly over Ashe's side. Ashe smiled over at him. "Thank you, Dedue. For making us wait and for making sure I was ready. Thank you for making this perfect."

"It's not over yet," Dedue promised him. "When you're feeling up to it, we'll get you washed up and then finish our picnic in the living room. We still have a lot of fruit that needs to be dipped in chocolate and eaten."

Ashe laughed. Despite the pain it caused he inched forward until he could give Dedue a chaste kiss. "That sounds pretty good. But do you know what sounds even better?"

"What's that?" Dedue asked, looking amused.

"If we could do this again tonight after we finish our picnic."

Dedue laughed hard enough to make the bed shake. "We'll see. It might be better to just let you recover. Remember, we both work tomorrow night."

"I'll be fine by tomorrow," Ashe insisted. He shifted. Made a face. "Well, good enough for work. I am _not_ letting the twins see me like this."

Dedue laughed again. He smoothed hair back out of Ashe's face and kissed his forehead. "I think the twins may already suspect something, Ashe."

"Yeah, well." Ashe sighed. "They'll move out soon and then I won't have to worry about what they know or suspect."

"Did Cole decide to move into the dorms at his university?" Dedue asked, slightly surprised.

"Yeah, with work-study, it's actually cheaper," Ashe explained. "And Cinda has been wanting to move out on her own since she turned sixteen. She'll probably live at home for a little while longer to save up, but then she's threatening to move in with some friends from school."

"Does that worry you?" Dedue asked, concerned.

"No, Cinda can take care of herself," Ashe said, yawning. "But I guess it'll be lonely, living by myself for the first time ever." He snuggled closer, rubbing his nose against Dedue's chest. He laughed softly. "Hey, you want to move in with me, Dedue?"

Ashe was halfway to sleep and missed the sudden stillness that froze Dedue's breathing.

"We'll see, Ashe. We'll see."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, this was meant to be a one-shot, yet here we are 5 chapters later. I'd like to call it complete now, but who knows? If I add any more chapters, I'll announce them on my [Twitter](https://twitter.com/ShiroKabocha1). Thanks for reading!

**Author's Note:**

> This is so sweet that I thought I'd end it here. But should there be a chapter two, maybe check in with Ashe and Dedue after they've been dating for a while? (And maybe up the rating from M to E?) Let me know your thoughts in the comments or on [Twitter](https://twitter.com/ShiroKabocha1)!


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